Shape after 40? Harder to stay slim!

[Landscapehorizon]

Most of my adult life I’ve been a size 8, briefly a 10-12 after my children but the last few years I’ve been a 6-8.
Im 5ft6 and have been 8st 4lbs for quite a while but since turning 40 I’ve put on a couple of pounds, round my middle, which I can’t get back off.
Periods are still regular but could this be the start of peri-menopause?
Im very strict with what I eat to maintain my weight, five days a week I have approx 900 calories and then two days I eat under 500. I’m not underestimating the calories I eat as I’m very careful.
How have people managed to stay slim as they enter middle age? Exercise? I don’t do much exercise as never seem to have time between the dc and working 37 hours a week but I think it might be the only way.
I feel like my shape is changing and I don’t like it much!

Your metabolism will be slow if you are eating so few calories and you won’t be getting enough nutrients. I think you should find time to exercise and eat more.
Im 46 and don’t have a problem maintaining weight - but size 8-10 as opposed to 6. I eat a balanced diet, at least 1,800 calories a day, run and lift weights..

In order to maintain balance as we get older and to build muscle etc you need exercise. A few of my friends like you existed on low calories all their lives and now have osteoporosis. They have to take calcium and walk...mandatory..10,000 steps a day. One of them has already broken two bones at different times in quite simple accidents. Their faces look very thin which l feel is more aging. I am your height and weighed the same when younger but did find it difficult to maintain that in my 50s. But l am not prepared to exist on those calories. However l don't have osteoporosis and do lots of exercise: gym/ walk/ golf etc and actually feel better in my body with lots of energy and strength. Exercise is fun and very good for your mental health as well as socially so good to keep it going all through your life.

Way too few calories 😳 your body won’t be healthy on that diet. Not at all. I would also be concerned about your bone health - as we get older you need to incorporate a lot of calcium rich foods as our oestrogen drops and that makes our bones more brittle. HRT is important but so is diet.

I have put on a lot of weight as I’ve hit my 40s. I’ve always been a size 8/10 most of my life but then I developed a lot of autoimmune issues (lupus, Addison’s, all sorts) and ended up taking a lot of steroids so I’ve gone up to 14.5 stones, roughly a size 16. I am still very healthy and active though. I make sure I get a brisk walk in everyday - download the active 10 app - and I walk about an hour or so really fast (can’t run / do cardio due to joint and eye issues). Personally I’d rather accept I’m a bit larger and just go with it rather than spend my life worrying about what I eat the whole time.

That's a valid and very significant point. Trip or fall and OP is royally f*cked. Incredibly dangerous.

I was surprised that so many people had posted before you without stating the obvious - I know a few had commented on how low the OPs daily calorie count is, but most hadn't acknowledged how disordered her eating is.
The OP has existed on very few calories in order to maintain an unhealthily low weight for her height/body type for so long, that she probably doesn't think she has an eating disorder, but she definitely does.

I suspect @DietrichandDiMaggio that most of us were thinking the same but trying to gently introduce the concept of eating for health and nutrition rather than coming out with a statement that may possibly result in the OP feeling defensive.

It's hard to know the best way to phrase things on a forum.

I hope you are ok OP

Im very strict with what I eat to maintain my weight, five days a week I have approx 900 calories and then two days I eat under 500. I’m not underestimating the calories I eat as I’m very careful.
How have people managed to stay slim as they enter middle age? Exercise? I don’t do much exercise as never seem to have time between the dc and working 37 hours a week but I think it might be the only way.

What are you eating typically @Landscapehorizon because I think that's an unhealthily low number to maintain.

Exercise and healthy eating, no alcohol. I'm a size 8-10 (waist size 6-8) but I exercise daily (obsessed) run and lift (light) weights. But I eat more, and consequently my calorie count must be higher (I rarely weigh myself and never calorie count).

You couldn't exercise on those scant calories, it would be like a car trying to run on empty. You'd probably faint or make yourself unwell without fuel.

I suppose I look at it more as let’s not normalise starving yourself to stay thin (underweight in the OP’s case), so that other people don’t read this and think that’s what everyone who is slim does.

Yes I do understand @DietrichandDiMaggio . It's hard to know what to say for the best isn't it.
We don't have the context of a human voice or knowing who the audience is which makes it tough

There is no scientific evidence that meno causes weight gain, or that it is more difficult to keep off.
Meno will cause the weight to redistribute differently, in some women. This hasn’t happened to women in my family, although my sister developed larger breasts.

it may be harder to shift accumulated weight due to lifestyle factors - middle aged proclivity towards wine, lol, and routines. Middle aged people tend, on the whole, to move a bit less and diet more - often thwarting efforts to lose weight.
I would say habits are more insidious than calories, and it depends where you are sourcing those calls (again, wine, sugar free crap). And it will be different for all of us. Some women’s bodies alter after having children, it is difficult to pin it down.

I am 50 and haven’t found it difficult to stay slim, but this is more that my routines haven’t changed and I am still active (rarely drive, love yoga), and I don’t much like booze. I would say it is more genetic than age related.

You’ll have to just accept it. Unless you want to literally starve yourself as going lower calorie wise is ridiculous. Are you not worried about osteoporosis?

@VanessaBellsDressingGown

Interesting. So it’s not a full gone conclusion then that you will struggle more. I’m 35 so not going through meno yet but everyone tells me there’s no hope once you get to meno.

I would just strongly advise you @Landscapehorizon not to attempt strenuous exercise on a daily calorie intake of 900 or 500 calories.

Posters need to say it outright. You have an eating disorder. This isn't normal and you're going to end up with massive health issues.

You’re on a starvation diet. You need to increase calorie intake via healthy eating as pp have suggested, and do some (preferably weight bearing) regular exercise.

OP I’m closer to 50 than 40 and an easy size 6. I’m the same height but weigh a few pounds more than you want to be. I probably eat double what you do, but I also do quite a bit of exercise.

Restricting your food intake to the extent you are over a long period is eventually going to negatively affect your health. You can maintain your figure without going to such extremes. Exercise is the key. There is a photo of me on here somewhere if you want confirmation.

I fear so. That's why I strongly advised OP not to attempt exercise on such few calories. It would be dangerous.

The trouble is with eating such a low amount and keeping thin, as you get older you will start to look a lot older and haggard

I was always slim but am now 53 I have put weight on but I am not too bothered, there is no way on this Earth I am going to starve and deprive myself of the pleasure of eating good food. Life is too short. 😃