I'm allowed one S&B thread per year and this is it...

[ShowOfHands]

With the advent of the picture option on S&B, I thought it was probably about time I started my annual thread begging for help.

You'll all be horrified to know that I've already purchased a dress. I had a baby 11 months ago and have lost a lot of weight due to lugging him around. I'm also an entirely different shape and very little fits. It was necessary that I shop for the first time in two years. The dress is a done deal. I like it.

We have not one, but two weddings to go to. One of them is in the dead of winter, the other at the height of summer (so it'll be the same temperature at both of them and will no doubt rain). Winter wedding is in a medieval castle. I was thrilled when I heard. DH noticed and informed me that "if you wear that godawful velvet cloak, I will divorce you. You are not auditioning for a part in Merlin". Bastard. Anyway...

The summer one's in a church in Ireland, v Catholic, v posh. No doubt I'm not allowed to wear my cloak to that either.

The only shoes I own are Dr Marten's and the clumpier the better really. I don't wear heels. Is there something I can buy that is flat but will go with that dress and I can wear in winter and summer? Can I just wear tights in winter? I quite fancy some tan leather boat shoes. They're not really wedding wear are they? What do you wear at weddings? Do I have to wear a hat to the church (I have hundreds of hats, all ridiculous, one says 'ban the bomb' on it in tie dye, oh yes).

And what do I wear over it? Cardigan? Jacket? Er, my cloak? Money is very tight. I could KNIT something? That's probably a resounding no too, right?

[CountryCob]

Your dress is beautiful, go and have fun in it

[Tee2072]

Well, the turtles didn't change, but their clothes did...............

::goes to the total geek corner::

[TeamGlaikitBritain]

Are there new turtles??? I only remember because my dbro was obsessed by them back in the day

[Trills]

"Original turtles"?! That is some impressive geekdom.

[Tee2072]

That's Raphael, Glaikit...assuming original turtles...

[DontmindifIdo]

Are we still looking for shoes? If so, I like these also these would be good for the summer wedding...

Not sure about jackets...

[EduStudent]

Well, not many S&B threads descend in TMNT.

[TeamGlaikitBritain]

Ok Michelangelo was the orange turtle, Donatello was purple, so that means ds is either a da Vinci or a Nadal! Blue and red, which one is which?

[Tee2072]

There was some discussion of the names Riley, Willow and Tara in this house....

You gave birth to a turle?!?!

[ShowOfHands]

DS...

[ShowOfHands]

Seeing a solicitor tomorrow. He can have half my cloak.

You are such a geek. DH is more of a geek though. He wanted to name DS Sinister after the postapocalyptic gunshark in 200AD. He's lucky I didn't divorce him. Of course we named ds after a ninja turtle instead...

[TeamGlaikitBritain]

Dh suggested Arwen as a possible name for ds if he had been a dd! He would dig me I that cloak!!

[Tee2072]

And are any of your cloak pins made from Mithril? [geek emoticon]

[Tee2072]

You're divorcing your husband, then?

[ShowOfHands]

A cloak pin? No, I have several. I use them as skirt/wrap pins too and a couple of them work as brooches.

I'm watching a couple of pairs of (new) shoes and a (new) jacket on ebay, all based on suggestions from this thread. Both due to finish in the next 24hrs. If I get them, I'll post pics of them. I'm going to crochet something for my head too and am working on making some jewellery to match. I think I'm going with the cloak for the winter wedding. I'll stride and swoosh a lot. Probably take out a few fellow guests and come home with a couple of extra children hiding/trapped within it.

[Tee2072]

Okay, now I really want your cloak.....

For the non-geeks in the audience.

Do you have a cloak pin?

[TeamGlaikitBritain]

Are you any further forward Showy?

[ShowOfHands]

Ina DMs link for you coco. They're nice. I have some chestnut coloured DM mary janes which are sort of similar. And you can indeed still get loafers.

Thanks Glaikit. It's not style tbh, though I like your description of quirky and kookie. My brother says my style is 'special' with a certain look. Sarcasm and mild revulsion usually. I am not as mismatched as I pretend to be. I just have a predilection for patchwork, velvet and patchouli.

My cloak btw is v much like Arwen's silver cloak if that means anything to anyone.

[TeamGlaikitBritain]

you could wear either of those c oats to a wedding imo.
if you do id match shoes to that rather than the dress.

I like your style. quirky and kookie!

[cocolepew]

On the James and James website there are tan DM mary janes, called Ina, £55. Sorry can't link on phone.

[cocolepew]

I think the loafers are still your best bet. You used to be able to get DM loafers, can you still?

[ShowOfHands]

Nice jacket Remus. I absolutely do not have a purple version of one of those. Nope. I last wore it to my niece's christening. My sil was Not Impressed. I like the colour of the crazy shoes but I don't like the ballet style tbh. They're honestly what all the tweens and teens wear here. With jeggings and silly tiny bags which are too tiny to contain anything.

Today I want this in teal. Cheaper alternative here but still ££ and probably not weddingy enough. The namaste site is my happy place. I need to win the lottery.

Dilys, red shoes are awesome. I have a lot of DM shoes and at least 3 of them are bright red. They're a bit ban the bomb protest march for a wedding though.

[RemusLupinsBiggestGroupie]

Crazy red flat shoes

[RemusLupinsBiggestGroupie]

Great slippers. :)

There's nowt wrong with pirate jackets btw. I say that as somebody who yearns for <a class="break-all" href="http://www.google.co.uk/imgres?imgurl=img.costumecraze.com/images/vendors/franco/49387-Red-Coat-Soldier-Costume-large.jpg&imgrefurl=www.costumecraze.com/TRAD1048.html&usg=__lhsNBujQ97KpgMKTZ5D0XYVCnho=&h=1795&w=750&sz=138&hl=en&start=13&zoom=1&tbnid=UGmasn0S7xxZ1M:&tbnh=150&tbnw=63&ei=bIYlUPHtDs2Z0QWD-YGoCg&prev=/search%3Fq%3Dredcoat%2Bsoldier%26um%3D1%26hl%3Den%26gbv%3D2%26tbm%3Disch&um=1&itbs=1" rel="nofollow noindex" target="_blank">one of these to wear to work.

[DilysPrice]

The first thing I said when I saw magic appearing dress picture was "Pillar Box Red Shoes!", so am glad you have worked it out for yourself.
I think you should get the red Schue broguey-loafery things, they are good quality and you will wear them for ever, as opposed to spending a tenner less on something from New Look which will hurt your feet and you'll never wear again.

I am a total convert to the cause of red shoes, having given in to what I thought was a ludicrous urge to get some in the sales. Turns out they're incredibly versatile.