Step kids rules and responsibilities.

[Cakelaur]

I have a 15yr old DSS.

What chores/responsibilities/rules would you expect him to have?

Do your kids and step kids have the same chores etc? Even if they're there a shorter amount of time?

Would you except them to carry wallet/keys/face mask? Or would you provide them a face mask as and when necessary?

Thanks

@Castlepeak

Very good point FishyFriday. Though I do think it can be hard for someone not in the house full time to be in charge of laundry based tasks. It is not automatically OP’s job. It’s also possible that it’s a job that might be delegated to a single household member.

Except that the laundry based task is just putting your mask in the laundry basket at the end of the day and picking up a clean one from wherever you keep them. That's not impossible for a 15 year old at his dad's for contact.

DS isn't here all the time. I still expect him to put dirty clothes in the laundry basket. It's really not hard.

My teens prefer disposable masks. I know they aren't environmentally friendly but I buy each of them some masks which are kept in their bedrooms and it's up to them to take them when out or going to school.

The key thing - he will only remember if he feels the consequences and is locked out. If his Dad picks him up then get him to ask if he has mask and keys before he comes. If you're at home, great but I would t change my plans because he's forgotten again.

I know it's not easy for everyone to remember but they can be trained to remember most of the time. I bet he remembers his phone because that's important to him?

I would not be staying home in case this boy has forgotten his keys, that's an outrageous expectation.

That. The first time he can't go out or can't get back in because he doesn't have a key, might just focus his mind on it.

If you wanted to overcome the key problem though, you could always get a key safe. With our very basic one, the key is attached to the front of the safe so it can't easily be appropriated or put in his pocket. It's just a case of opening the front door and then attaching the front and the key back into the safe.

Yeah agree with pp, I wouldn't be staying in for him, that's a perfect instance of actions (or inactions) having consequences.

I wouldn't be nagging him about his room as I think it's quite important for teenagers to have their own space and feel they can be themselves in it, but of course if clothes are dirty when he wants them or things can't be found as a result of the mess, well that's down to him to resolve.

Thank you everyone. You have all made me feel better.

My biggest issue here is the lack of parenting and training of this young man. He's such a great kid, but neither his mum or dad push his to grow. I expect very little (my two year old has more responsibility) 😂 BUT I do think he needs to be taught to carry certain items, and shown how to start being responsible. But no parent is doing this.

I will defo stand my ground in this one. Because I think it's important for his development.