Drugs are fine..it seems

[LaBoheme]

Just wanted your thoughts really. SS (14) has told DH that M told him Ectacsy and Cannabis were fine (she dosen't mind if he tries) although Cocaine is not so good. I am totally horrified but DH is not so surprised or as upset as I am...I think he needs to adress this with her immediately but he disagrees. Am I overeacting to this?

With regards to the OP, I would say that you can't deny to your SS that drugs can make you feel good in the short term and that some people can use them and never have any problems but that the long term cost of drug aguse is not worth the high.

I agree with F&Z that you need to have discussion and maybe SS wants to hear another opinion than his mums and that it's good that he can talk to you about this.

However, finding the balance is tricky

Are you sure SS has given dh a full report of the conversation? Is it possible his mother said something more along the lines of 'drugs are not good but if you do try something, make sure it's a spliff or E'?

I wouldn't advocate drugs to a 14 yo at all but I do think you have to have more than a blanket 'all drugs are evil, try any of them once and you are on an inevitable path to death and destruction' approach. Because most teeenagers will know that isn't true. And will not listen to anything else you say on the subject. I was at university when Leah Betts died and I can remember we all thought the newspapers/government/experts were barking because they clearly knew far less about E than any of us did.

Have you looked up the sites of any of the drug education charities, or the government one (Frank, IIRC)? Might give you some ideas about approaches you could take.

Oh, and the 'experts' were responsible, in some way, for the scare stories that led poor Leah Betts to drink herself to death.

this is interesting and i think it ties in with mn views on drug use

"Levels of any illicit drug use varied considerably by ACORN area. Those living in Rising areas (which comprises affluent urbanities in town and city areas, prosperous professional metropolitan areas and better-off executives in inner-city areas) had by far the highest levels of use (20.5%) while those living in Thriving areas (wealthy achievers in suburban areas, affluent greys in rural communities and prosperous pensioners in retirement areas) reported the lowest levels (9.7%)."

I think the demographic of mn is probably very similar to that where the highest level of recreational drug use occurs

this has some excellent info on drugs and is very interesting to read

i think it has a lot of meaty stuff to discuss with a 14 year old

do read it

it's addressed to journalists but interesting

I agree totally with F&Z and motherinferior.

Think you have to be realistic about what teenagers are exposed to. I would go for the softly, softly approach myself and just try to make sure that your dss is aware of the pitfalls. I showed my dsc the picture of Daniela Westbrook (not sure of name, but ex-Eastenders girl) with only one nostril and explained it was due to cocaine abuse. I wouldn't be bothered about any of my children having the odd spliff, but again, you need to make sure they're aware it can have downsides if smoked long-term. The reality is that people know cigarettes and alcohol are bad for you, but still do them so you're never going to stop someone simply by saying "drugs are bad".

I agree with franny