Do you 'plan' activities for when step kids come?

[Elizabeth120914]

Just wondering we are no longer going to be doing expensive things at weekends but previously I've been arranging picnics and finding places to go too. Just wondered if others do this or just do what they normally would with the kids in tow?

Been reevaluating a lot of things and was just starting the chore of thinking of something 'free and entertaining' as I normally do for Sunday just wondered if that's what everyone does..?

I've got a house in the middle of being decorated and a tonne of jobs that OH needs to do but we normally just stop everything to try to entertain dsd if it was our kids I'd get them helping but she won't strip wall paper etc she will sulk down stairs and want to go home!

Same here in that at their mum's they're left alone, feed themselves, do nothing for hours. Yet it's boring here?

Today we planned to do the garden this morning and go out this afternoon. DP needs to work this morning (from home) so we were setting the kids up to do some. DSD turned round and said "I'm not doing it, I'm not a slave".

No you're not.......but if you don't help us, we can't earn the money to take you out this afternoon.

It isn't that we expect them all to work all day, but we are trying to teach them that in life you work hard for things you want!!

It doesn't help that as their mum works full time, when she has time off they go out. Plus they regularly get spoilt with 'stuff'......DSD has more clothes than me and DP put together

We do a mixture of things, we do some just hanging round the house doing craft or cooking or reading or board games. Other times we will do fun things but there's loads of cheap things like kids a.m. at the cinema so we can have fun for a few quid.

SD's mum has inhereted wealth and so they do expensive holidays etc. We go the other way and do butlins or holidays with the sun vouchers, try to do old fashioned things like make a sandcastle.

I think I was one of the people saying about not feeling the needn to spend money doing amazing special treats all the time. For us we will never 'compete' with her mum for expensive treats, and her dad is a serious force in her life not just a play parent / entertainer. So what we focus on is time talking and listening, learning to enjoy simple cheap fun times, and our most important lesson that we aren't made of money, and even if we can afford to blow cash on something doesn't mean we will. She seemed sometimes to think that money is an endless free resource so I enjoy to sayto her no we can't afford that, if we spend money on that we won't have so much to spend at butlins. It does kids good to hear no sometimes and realise the world won't end.

Packet of loom bands each and see who can make the longest chain / dinkiest thing / most intricate pattern / etc?

And have penalties for asking what time is she going (10 bands off each time she asks) or rewards (10 bands a time so it can be little and often) when she does something nice/good/not bad...

We do a mixture of things, we do some just hanging round the house doing craft or cooking or reading or board games. Other times we will do fun things but there's loads of cheap things like kids a.m. at the cinema so we can have fun for a few quid.

SD's mum has inhereted wealth and so they do expensive holidays etc. We go the other way and do butlins or holidays with the sun vouchers, try to do old fashioned things like make a sandcastle.

I think I was one of the people saying about not feeling the needn to spend money doing amazing special treats all the time. For us we will never 'compete' with her mum for expensive treats, and her dad is a serious force in her life not just a play parent / entertainer. So what we focus on is time talking and listening, learning to enjoy simple cheap fun times, and our most important lesson that we aren't made of money, and even if we can afford to blow cash on something doesn't mean we will. She seemed sometimes to think that money is an endless free resource so I enjoy to sayto her no we can't afford that, if we spend money on that we won't have so much to spend at butlins. It does kids good to hear no sometimes and realise the world won't end.

Well I saw MIL yesterday and they are going away in the caravan this weekend and so we are going to meet them for lunch as it's only about 40 miles away.. Not telling dsd we will see if she wants to come before discussing activities from now on!

Not sure how exciting this will be for her but they took her out all weekend last time she came and spent a fortune so if they want us to go she's going!