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Mumsnetters share with Cancer Research UK the life admin that they never get around to doing, including updating or writing their Will

313 replies

LucyBMumsnet · 20/01/2020 10:30

This sponsored discussion is now closed. Thank you to everyone who posted on this thread.

Often when we have children, it feels impossible to find the time to do anything that isn’t absolutely crucial…and before you know it, there are things on your to-do-list which have been on there for well over a year or decade. Those little jobs around the house, buying a gift for your OH, clearing out the wardrobe or – one you might not have thought of – sorting out your Will. With this in mind, Cancer Research UK would like to hear about the things you struggle to get around to doing.

Here’s what Cancer Research UK has to say: “We know that updating your Will or writing one from scratch can be a daunting prospect, and one of those things that you might feel just isn’t a priority right now. However, we think writing a Will is far too important to ignore; if you don’t, not only could you leave your loved ones with distressing admin, but it also means the law would decide how your estate is distributed – and this might not be in line with your wishes. Cancer Research UK offer a Free Will Service open to anyone over the age of 18 which guides you through the process step by step, and you can have your Will written within 30 minutes, and tick that job off your list.”

What are the odd-ends you never seem to get around to doing? What are the things that stand in the way of you sorting these out? Where does writing or updating your Will feature on your to-do list (if at all!)? Do you think Cancer Research UK’s Free Will Service would help you?

All who share their thoughts and feelings on the thread below will be entered into a prize draw where 3 lucky MNers will each win a £100 voucher for a store of their choice (from a list).

Thanks and good luck,

Insight T&Cs apply

*If you'd like to find out more about CRUK’s Free Will Service and legacy gifts please click here

Mumsnetters share with Cancer Research UK the life admin that they never get around to doing, including updating or writing their Will
OP posts:

Peony99 · 25/01/2020 03:06

I never get around to switching energy!

Now that I have a DD I know writing a will should go further up my list too.


kateandme · 25/01/2020 04:14

i worry about this alot.all the things youd want to think of so that its easy on those left.
also how would it be ok if i went suddenly.i often think should i write just incase letters!i have so much id want to say to them.tell them every day how much i loved them!you know the usual parent stuff.that scares me.
ive seen what can go wrong though without doing a will.
i think having some help would be really hepful.
i was also incredibly poorly when i was younger and had to go through with my parents how i would like things to be once i went.somehow im still here so it trigger alot in me having to think of these things.some support with that would be nice.


kateandme · 25/01/2020 04:17

Peony99 i know this isnt the point of the thread.but go on the compare websites and do your dont need to even switch.the money man did a program on this and on the compare website they are offering hhuge money saers within the supplier your currently on.ones which your suppliers will NOT offer you if you phone them direct.people saving hundreds.we didnt believe it.....but we just saved £500.


Wolfcub · 25/01/2020 09:24

A Will is definitely something that's perpetually on my to do list, along with cleaning the vacuum filter. I think a lot of it is the cost, there's never been any spare money at all to make it happen. I saw a divorce solicitor this week and they were adamant about the need for a Will right now. The big question now though is that I wouldn't want ds living with stbexh if I died (he's not mentally well enough) so how would I work my way through the guardianship issue.


DisgraceToTheYChromosome · 25/01/2020 10:40

We need to redo ours, as the current one is designed for a childless couple. As DD is nearly 24, this is somewhat lax. I can do it myself, as we're well under the CTT threshold. Give DD the house, give the lifeboat a grand, half of the residual cash into a trust for DGS' uni fees.


elizaco · 25/01/2020 11:18

Writing a will is definitely the most important piece of life admin we're avoiding. Usually I'm quite sensible and practical about stuff but really seem to struggle to get this sorted.


SaintEyning · 25/01/2020 11:23

This was a hugely important reminder - took less than 30 mins and very easy. My dad died last year - with a will - but nothing in the way of a record of all his bank accounts, pensions, insurance etc. It’s taken almost a year to get to probate. I’ve left a gift to CRUK as the service is free through their collaboration with the will company (incidentally had a leaflet from same company and it had been sitting on the side to do). So that’s a huge tick off the to do list. Thank you CRUK for the important reminder and the service.


del2929 · 25/01/2020 11:40

it is something i am meaning to do but dont know where to start really.


PickledChicory · 25/01/2020 13:00

No wills here tho stuff like life insurance, think only issue is if we both die. Mum, dad and my uncle dont have either!
Heaps of other life admin not done. Random pension schemes floating about. Should also fill in the form to become s breast feeding peer supporter too!


WarmHugs · 25/01/2020 15:16

Making a will, and updating it when the DC were born is/was a priority for me. I was 24 when I first got one, and I’m always surprised at people who don’t have one because they are “too young”. A relative died without a will because he thought he wouldn’t die at 50, and it left no end of trouble.

It’s easy to do, get one done!


EchoLocation · 25/01/2020 17:38

Tidying paperwork... it's trying to take over! I am pretty organised in dealing with the actual issue, then it just sits around cluttering up the place Blush


balletpanda · 26/01/2020 00:50

This is a very interesting question as honestly, I've never considered writing a will and actually that is so neglectful of me. I guess I don't feel enough of an adult to need one, even though I have savings, assets and dependents so really I need to get on and do it. The free will writing service would be of interest although if I'm totally honestly I know so little about writing a will that I didn't even realise it cost you money to do so.

Other life admin jobs I despise include anything involving having to go to the bank and also anything insurance related. So dull!


Goingovertosusanshouse · 26/01/2020 09:04

I’ve not written a will and I’m currently in process of sorting life insurance. I have a good death in service payout but I’d want the children to be comfortable financially after I die. Having the time to sit and do this is hard though.


CheeryCherry · 26/01/2020 10:25

I’ve never written a will before I’m separated and struggling to drag my abusive ex through divorce proceedings I guess I should look into this seriously now. In theory it should be straightforward splitting everything between my 3 children, so I would probably not be enticed to write one if I have to pay.
I also should look at life insurance/sickness schemes as I’ll be on my own and unable to cope financially with a mortgage without working.
I’m also putting off Power of Attorney for my mum who has dementia.


lemonjam · 26/01/2020 11:13

Ugh yes will, and life insurance, and pension...


yasmin0147 · 26/01/2020 18:19

We have tried to write a will, never get round to it, problem is we don’t have any assets whatsoever, so there’s nothing to leave in a will anyway


gamerwidow · 26/01/2020 18:26

We've written a will including a stipulation for custody of DD but I keep forgetting to update it to our new address since we moved last year.


evespudding · 26/01/2020 19:56

Something I know I should do but never get round to. Appointing children's guardians is a sticking point.


LucyBMumsnet · 27/01/2020 10:53

Hi @MissKittyFantastico84,

Thanks for your post. Cancer Research UK have asked us to pass on the following response:

"We’ve removed the age limit on our Free Will Service and it can now be used by anyone over the age of 18." Smile

OP posts:

Onlyme39 · 27/01/2020 15:09

I've had cancer and can honestly say its scared the living daylight out of me , my son was 13 at the time , never evev thought about writing a will upon having the cancer!!! Its a very scary experience Smile . I have now made my will and have everything in place


StinkEye · 27/01/2020 16:15

For me, it's writing down all our bank account details, ISA's, various savings accounts, should the worst happen to me. My husband would not have a clue where our money is. I also have multiple pensions which really need sorting out.


Sam1904 · 27/01/2020 20:09

Will writing is always a difficult topic. No one wants to think about their death or their partner's death. It's rather morbid but its something I've been putting of for a while. My main concern is who would care for my kids. I plan to get my will done in 2020!


emphasisofmatter · 27/01/2020 21:17

We only got around to doing our will last year. I would like to be more organised around pension planning. also the monthly bills and outgoings and knowing when subscriptions like broadband come to an end - need to be more on the ball with these things!


Evo141 · 27/01/2020 21:55

My estranged wife & I had a will but now we're divorced I know I need to set-up a new one but re-opening all of that up after a somewhat acrimonious divorce fills me with dread!
Oh & since then I have had an illness scare that may see my critical illness cover payout which would complete change what my estate would look like (AND the illness really means I need to sort the will!)


RitaHayworthHair · 28/01/2020 01:35

All my finances are sorted and I have a robust will covering all bases.

But I desperately need to de clutter Confused

Also I don't have any funeral plans in place! Never thought of that before.

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