Excluded from school for computer use

[Ltippytoe]

My 14 year old son has been excluded for 3 days for nearly introducing a virus to his school, and he could have been permanently excluded. How can I get him to take the school rules seriously? I think his ADHD is causing him to make bad impetuous decisions but I'm really worried he'll get into serious trouble. He loves coding and exploring what he can do with it, but he doesn't know where to stop!

I would really appreciate if anyone has any advice or just to hear from anyone who has had a similar experience?

Is DS on medication? What support is he receiving?

The SN boards are quieter but you don’t get some of the awful comments you sometimes get on the main boards.

We have just received his first prescription so he will be starting medication this weekend. I hope that will help, but what if it doesn't?

Thanks for explaining about the boards, I didn't know that.

He doesn't receive any particular support, just some adjustments at school. I'm not sure what would help him with this specific type of thing? He's starting the Understanding My ADHD and Autism course in a couple of weeks time.

There are lots of different medications to try, so I wouldn’t worry too much yet.

You could also look at coaching/mentoring too.

What did he do to 'nearly' introduce a virus into school? Sounds like he's going to end up going into something computer related though so I'd focus on trying to keep him really doing positive things that he can put on a uni application/cv. DS is autistic and doing a software engineering degree apprenticeship, he loves it.

Get him doing the Unity junior programmer course if he hasn't already (it's free), ethical hacking courses, cyber security, if he's already really good at Python then get him looking at minimax to program games to be able to play against the computer (ds wasn't doing this till 17 though so might be a stretch yet I don't know).

Turn it into a positive, get him thinking about this as a career and building his CV.

Thank you, that's really helpful. He does want to follow a career in this direction but I've never really known how to direct him to anything out of school that would help him. I will have a look at all of these suggestions. I feel like he does have skills that are being overlooked because he is directing them the wrong way, so it is useful to hear about how I can redirect them.

He nearly introduced a virus in that it was only the school's antivirus software that stopped him! He was experimenting with coding and got AI to write him some kind of really high level program that could have done damage to the school's system.

I'm just worried that he doesn't know where the boundaries are and what is dangerous.

'How can I get him to take the school rules seriously?'

Was it a one off? Does he struggle following school rules?

Only regarding computer use. He does struggle to follow those rules. He tries to push them as far as he can and look for loopholes. I'm just worried he's going to get into more serious trouble because he doesn't think of the consequences of his actions.

He didn’t “nearly introduce a virus” … he was practicing on the computers, and the checks & balances that school have put in place (the anti-virus) stopped anything bad from happening.

If they don’t want students writing code, they need to take those Applications off the system. It is thier responsibility to make sure that the system is safe & secure.

Yes, he shouod follow the rules, but the Cyber-Security at the school seem lax

Yes, they should be able to trust in their systems. It shouldn't be possible for one child to bring down the whole thing. We've got to balance supporting the school and the sanctions they want to use but also supporting our son and making sure they are giving him what he needs to make the most of his skills and interest. considering also the help he needs because of his special needs.

The thing that scares me is that they said that if he had been a neurotypical student, they might have permanently excluded him!

There is a fine balance between helping your child to follow rules (especially if this is something he repeatedly struggles with) and supporting his needs OP.

Perhaps he needs both.

I think he does. There's a lot of fine balancing in raising neurodivergent children!

He's gone back to school refreshed and seems to have a different outlook, so I hope this can be used as a positive reset. Something had to be done about his obsessive computer use so maybe this is it. I will need to keep track of how the school are helping to support his skills and interest as well as keeping him within the rules. He's on a tight lockdown with the school systems now.