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new to this forum - adhd/dyspraxia in uni student

8 replies

Misthios · 23/08/2024 08:21

I haven't posted in this forum so please be gentle with me...

I have a 21 year old son who has always been quirky and different. Through school he was mostly OK. Struggled with coordination and handwriting, found it difficult to make friends and was allowed to do his exams on a computer rather than written. Got a dyspraxia diagnosis when he was 17 and that was no surprise to any of us.

Uni has been a massive struggle from the get go, he started in 2021 in Scotland when we were STILL under massive covid restrictions and he was online for all the year apart from about 5 or 6 occasions when he was in (socially distanced) for lab time. Despite this, passed 1st and 2nd year exams. Began to think there was more to the disorganisation and procrastination than dyspraxia and he started to investigate a ADD/ADHD diagnosis about this time last year, a consultant pyschiatrist agreed that yes, he had inattentive adhd. Again, no real surprise and looking back at his school reports from Primary they are full of "struggles to focus" or "requires prompting to stay on task".

Anyway. He has failed a module in his 3rd year of his degree and has been put in academic suspension for next year. This means he won't attend class and will have another go at the resit. We are very worried about him and what this means for him, something clearly needs to change as what he's been doing so far isn't working for him. He is looking at going back to the people who diagnosed him last year (privately) and discussing medication. Also things like tutoring, support, coaching. We're both (me and his dad) at a bit of a loss how to support him through this and what to do for the best - is it best to try to get him through this, bearing in mind that if he gets through this year there is a final year with harder exams and a dissertation/project to do, or encourage him to explore other avenues. I am most concerned that if he takes this suspension he'll just sit for a year in his bedroom and we'll be back here this time next year.

OP posts:
EndlessLight · 23/08/2024 16:55

Has DS spoken to disability services at the university? Would resitting the whole year be possible?

Is DS receiving support via DSA?

It is definitely worth looking at medication. However, before going private for medication, if continuing to afford private prescriptions would be a problem, you/DS need to check with DS’s GP if they are willing to take on shared care.

Misthios · 23/08/2024 17:57

He has been engaging with the disability and wellbeing people yes, they have been supportive but in a moral support type of way rather than a practical way. I don't think he'd be allowed to retake the whole year as he has passed 75% of it, but it's on the list of things to ask. He is not getting DSA either, will add that to the list...

OP posts:
EndlessLight · 23/08/2024 18:29

If DS has given/will give consent for you to speak to the disability service, I would speak to them. They should be providing practical support and they should have prompted DS to apply for DSA.

PolaroidPrincess · 29/08/2024 20:10

Definitely seek DSA. DC1 has inattentive ADHD and has found the weekly mentoring sessions very useful. He's had some struggles during his first year but I don't think he would have stuck it without the help provided by his DSA.

Misthios · 29/08/2024 20:54

DS had a meeting today with the student union advice team who were very helpful and reassuring, and they've given him extra avenues to explore for support. Starting to feel a bit more positve.

OP posts:
FlyingPandas · 02/09/2024 20:57

Please encourage him to apply for DSA, OP. As @PolaroidPrincess says it can mean the difference between coping and not.

My DS has ASD and inattentive ADHD and is about to head back to university for his final year, honestly his weekly support mentoring sessions have been absolutely invaluable. They are all online so really flexible (he's continued to work with his mentor every week whilst he's been at home for the summer for example). It is definitely worth exploring DSA alongside other avenues of support.

PolaroidPrincess · 02/09/2024 21:06

Our DS has virtual mentoring too and has also continued his over the Summer, fitting it in between his work and holidays.

Trainham · 07/09/2024 12:50

He should be able to resist .it doesn't matter if this happens

My son took 5 years to complete his 3 year degree.
uni were brilliant at supporting him once he asked for it.
If I got worried about him I could phone uni who would do a welfare check on him.

He was also given a mentor and the same guy supported him through the years of his degree

He didn't have it easy but I was even prouder of him for sticking with it and he got a 2.1 in the end.
At his graduation ceremony all of his tutors personally spoke to him and praised him for his determination to succeed.

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