Autism - Moving into Halls of Residence - any advice?

[BethanG]

Hi
My eldest has autism, and will be moving into halls in september (fingers crossed for results day) I'm so confused as to what kind of halls would be best. I want him to have friends but i know his own space is very important to him. He will hopefully be going to Manchester. Any general advice on choosing Halls would be helpful - thank you x

When DD2 first applied for halls we thought about:

Ensuite v sharing a bathroom - sharing with strangers would have been too much for DD2.
Self catered v catered - DD2 prefers cooking her own meals, whereas others find cooking too much.
Proximity to lectures/library/gym/supermarket - if close to lectures you can go back during the day between lectures/labs.
How many rooms in the flat and how many share a kitchen or is a studio necessary - DD2 is OK sharing a kitchen as long as it isn't overly large/busy.
Do you university have quiet halls or flats - even if they don't some halls are usually regarded as more outgoing, party halls.

Have you/DS spoken to the university's disability service and applied for DSA?

Thank you so much for your detailed response - it's really helpful - I had broken things down into the same questions - catered / self chattered, location and shared or ensuite. The website says there are "lifestyle modified" Halls but doesn't say which ones - I will ring on Tuesday and ask. I think he would be best with catered halls as he can't even handle me being in the kitchen as the same time as he is - so fir first year I was hoping he might accept catered so that's one less stress factor in his life - obvs he doesn't cope well with change and transitions.

I attended a webinar run by the Disability Service and will be sending off the paperwork this week. Can I ask if there was anything your dd found essential for the DSA to pay for?

How's your daughter getting on? Also thanks again for replying - it does mean a lot and was very helpful!

The problems with catered halls is that the dining room can be busy/noisy/overwhelming and if your DC has sensory issues with textures/tastes it can be difficult.

DD2 is in her third year now. She has settled much better than any of us imagined - made like minded friends, living in a house with 2 of them, secured a placement for next year before returning to university for her masters year in 22/23.

DSA provide a mentor, study skills sessions, a general allowance (e.g. for additional printing/photocopying required), laptop software and a travel allowance (DD2 rarely uses this). Prior to Covid most lectures/notes were put online anyway but when a lecturer didn't a note taker was provided. With laptops you pay £200 and any upgrade costs. For DD2 the mentor and laptop software have been the most helpful.

For university owned or managed halls the university is expected to finance the difference between a standard room and the accommodation needed because of a student's disability. Whereas, for private halls and private houses/flats DSA covers the difference as long as the need for a certain accommodation is included in the needs assessment.

Dd lived at home for the first year then moved into halls and had an en-suite but within walking distance of our house. They put her with older studious students rather than 18 year olds. Actually she did drop out (covid meant she couldn't cope) and she's going elsewhere in September, we have booked her a bedsit instead because sharing the messy kitchen was doing her head in. It's a block with a quiet after 10pm policy with mature and post grad students

Dd has autism and started uni last September. She also has a history of mental health issues, which at times have been severe. We got a letter from our gp to say that for her mental health she would cope best in the ‘quiet’ halls and that she would need an en-suite room - she would never manage to share a bathroom. She is in self catering halls as likes to be responsible for her own food - she is a good cook. She has made friends (which I was worried about) and next year will share a house with 3 of them.

This may or may not be helpful - dd is quite high functioning and very reluctant to tell people about her autism. She also has ADD and GAD. Her close friends know and they know she has had mental health issues, but they have no idea how bad (she has been an in-patient in an adolescent psychiatric unit 4 times). She is desperate to fit in and I have and continue to talk to her a lot about this, especially around issues like alcohol. She missed out on teenage experimentation and rites of passage and is vulnerable - I worry a lot about this and possibly always will!

I have two at university with ASDs and other issues.

When looking at accommodation the main aim has been to reduce stress as much as possible as there will be other stresses you and they have no control over.

I think an ensuite is essential as sharing a bathroom is stressful for most people.

Catering/ self- catering is more difficult and depends on the individual. It they like cooking and are competent then self-catering is likely to be better as it avoids the problems with catering which 10 green bottles outlined above. Bear in mind though that planning, shopping and cooking for every meal can be overwhelming and is different from cooking the odd meal at home.
There is also the problem of shared kitchens. Unless you are incredibly lucky shared kitchens will be messy.
A studio flat resolves that problem but they are expensive. If you want to go down that route make sure that it is very clear on the DSA assessment that it is necessary for disability reasons and why.

Not all universities have quiet halls or flats but it can be a good option if it is offered. They can however be too quiet if everyone has social communication difficulties. Ds was in quiet flats in halls for two years and I don't think he said more than a brief hello to any of his flatmates.

However that is not necessarily a problem as my two actually got to know people in other ways (course mates, ASD support groups and voluntary work).

Other things to consider is how much cleaning the halls provide and how they are managed.
DD is in halls on a large site with 24 hour security which sees itself as a welfare service. That has proved very useful at times and also makes me feel happier about her being there.

Neither of mine have had smooth paths through university and I continue to worry about them daily. However I have found the support and flexibility available from different parts of their university infinitely better than when they were at school.
(SFE is an exception, mainly because they appear to badly managed.)