I think that I need some professional help to deal with DS

[mckenzie]

DS was diagnosed in primary school with High Functioning Aspergers and dyspraxia. He has attended main stream schools and college an is now working. Lots of people would never know he has these issues; we just say that he is quirky.

He has always had quirks (doesn't like the sight nor sound of apples, can't use a or be near someone using a pencil etc).
But just recently, he's got some new phobias (is that the correct term) and I don't know how to deal with them. It's starting to really get me down and it's so upsetting for DS. I don't know what to do for the best and the rest of the family are looking to me for guidance and I just don't know.

Do I go to my GP and ask to be referred for some help?
Do I ask somewhere else?
Do I get a book for some guidance? any recommendations gratefully received.

TIA

Bump

Very hard to say anything as you've not given any indication of what the 'new phobias' are.

Is it sensory? Is it new sensory issues? This is for children but will give you some clue www.falkirk.gov.uk/services/social-care/disabilities/docs/young-people/Making%20Sense%20of%20Sensory%20Behaviour.pdf?v=201507131117

Is it affecting his work? If so, are they aware of his ASD and Dyspraxia and can they make reasonable adjustments?

Thanks for replying BT
DS has to rinse every item before using it or eating of it, even if taking it straight out of the dishwasher after the cycle has finished. We can’t then go anywhere near the plate, fork etc. If I’m dishing up and, for example, I lean my arm anywhere near his plate, he has a melt down, the food has to be binned, the plate rinsed and we start again.
I’ll look at the link you sent. Thank you

I think taking him to the GP would be a good place to start. Definitely ask to be referred on. It's hard to say exactly what to ask for as services vary locally. SENDIASS are excellent near me.

If I’m dishing up and, for example, I lean my arm anywhere near his plate, he has a melt down, the food has to be binned, the plate rinsed and we start again.

This sounds potentially as though it might fit within an OCD presentation (it might not, though, please take it with pinch of salt, obviously can't diagnose over internet). I would be a bit concerned that these behaviours could escalate if the root cause isn't dealt with.

Ocd-uk have a very informative website which might be worth a look.

Thanks for your reply Tableclothing but I've got zero chance of getting DS to the doctors (that's another issue). That's why I think I need to learn how to help DS and how best to deal with these issues.

I don't think you stand much chance to be honest, but in that situation, I'd find out what's cranking his anxiety up to such a high level, then remove that from his life.

As he refuses contact with professionals, then I'd research complementary medicine to see what he could possibly help.I understand you or he may not wish to do that as an option.

Jumping on this bandwagon, I don't think this is going to go away without addressing the root cause, and I agree it does sound like it would fit with OCD type behaviours.
I went through a period of this, though nowhere near as extreme, and I think it is common among ASD.
Try and get him down the GP, it is really something he needs to speak to a professional about. Are there any new stressors at work, maybe a change of job or something stressful that could have caused this issue?
Could you also maybe encourage him to cook or even just dish up his own food? Then no one but him would have to go near it. I'm not sure if that would feed into his phobia too much, but it might help take the pressure off you a little.