Should dd go for a diagnosis.

[fuzzyfozzy]

Dd is 18, she already has a diagnosis of dyslexia. She accepts (begrudgingly) that she probably has Aspergers (I have sn experience and family experience, the senco agreed too) she didn't want the label at school.
My question is would this help her when she gets a job, she's very good at masking.
Or should she carry on as she is.

Hi fuzzy,

I think it depends if it is something she wants to do?
She would not need to declare it if she didn't want to, but could if it helped.
Even in a casual way, it could help for her to use the diagnosis to explain her difficulties .
At university, where my eldest attended, there was a young man who had poor social skills and in the end, annoyed people to the point no one wanted to share a house with him in the second year. It wasn't until the second year that he shared his diagnosis. I think people would have been more tolerant and understanding if he had shared his diagnosis straight away.
I think if you go ahead, you should talk through the kind of questions you might be asked and go through signs from her childhood with her - so she doesn't get upset at you saying things and there are no surprises. It will be important that you are involved, if she masks and if she doesn't remember a lot from her childhood.
My understanding is that people who mask can be at risk of mental health difficulties from the sheer effort of keeping up appearances. If she needed time off work because of stress etc, a diagnosis might help?
Just some thoughts :)

Thanks for that, it's good to have different ways to think of it.
I'd like for her to have people's understanding I guess, but equally it's not my life! Argh

Maybe show her this?

www.theguardian.com/society/2018/sep/14/thousands-of-autistic-girls-and-women-going-undiagnosed-due-to-gender-bias#top

Thanks I'll have a look

Hi
She's decided she'd like to be assessed. It seems gp is the way to go.
Does anyone have any advice?

Can you ask the former SENCO to write her thoughts on your DD's presentation as having AS/ASD and take that with you to the GP.

Also you/DD need to outline the difficulties she has with general life-stuff which her peers don't struggle with that would add weight to her being different enough to be assessed. More suggestions here.
www.autism.org.uk/about/diagnosis/adults.aspx
"Try to give your GP some examples of difficulties you've had in adulthood and childhood with communication, social interaction, sensory difficulties, friendships or employment, and the need for routine, and how much you think these affect the different areas of your life."

NHS waiting lists vary throughout the UK from a few months to getting on for 2 years.
If you want to go private, ask who your GP can refer you to who has a lot of experience in diagnosing autism in women because women present very differently to men.
The Lorna Wing Centre is the Gold Standard for diagnosing women, it's expensive and also recognised by the NHS in case your DD wanted to use the dx for help at FE or Uni.

There's a lot of discussion about seeing the GP to ask for a dx as an adult here www.mumsnet.com/Talk/mumsnetters_with_sn

Thanks!! Very helpful

We went to the gp. Who referrred her
She had a initial quick call then a half hour assessment/questions session over the phone.
She apparently scored highly indicating someone else would be in touch!