17yo DD potential ASD diagnosis - Long sorry

[WingsOfADove]

Hi all

Have posted this in chat and been advised to post here. I'm new to this so thanks for reading.

DD1 (17) has been refrerred to CAMHS after she has disclosed what appeared to be quite will hidden OCD tendancies.

I went with her to her first meeting with a MH nurse last week and we had a really long discussion about DD's behaviours now and when she was growing up.

I realised for the first time as I was answering the questions that she has always displayed ASD behaviour. I suppose the only reason I've never realised before is that she had quite advanced verbal skills when she was very young and is very affectionate.

At the end of the session the nurse asked me if I had any thoughts and when I suggested ASD she said that DD would need to see a psychiatrist for a formal diagnosis but it did look very likely that we've actually been managing it very well as family for all of DD's life.

She is going to refer DD to the psychiartrist and ask the school for their input to move towards a formal diagnosis. I know there is no 'cure' and that we just need to carry on helping DD to manage.

I've obviously Googled DD's current and past behaviours some of which are:

Seems to have a 'sattelite delay' when asked a question
hand flappng
sensitivity to touch, light and certain noises
repetative tics
hates making decisions
fixation on certain people
over the top emotional reactions
always asking "what if...?"
only socialises in specific organised activities
very driven in music and drama activities e.g. learning whole scripts, not just her own lines, although she switches off if someone talks for too long

Taking into account her early language development it looks to me most likely that she has Aspergers.

DH and I have spoken to her about this and she was not really surprised and is quite relieved that there is a reason for being 'different'.

We're really proud that she is a lovely hard working, kind and polite young woman who has done so well academically so far despite (by her own recent admission) the fact that she switches off half way thorough lessons.

My two biggest concerns are how she will cope when she goes to university next year. I really want her to develop independance but worry that she'll be overloaded with trying to cope with work and looking after herself. She's always been quite reliant on me but I always put it down to a mixture of her being our PFB and a bit lazy grin.

Also, she is really torn between applying for a degree in performing arts or Psychology. We haven't tried to push her either way, other than to discuss potential jobs after graduation, but now I'm thinking that perhaps she should follow her passion for acting rather than persue the more academic route if it's going to be too much for her (please don't think I'm saying that poeple with AS can't be academic, I just think she may do better following a true passion).

I don't really know what I'm asking here other than to just get my thoughts out.

Anyone with experience of teens (and older) with AS please feel free to share your thoughts.

TIA

Sorry not much help on offer here regarding uni, Dd1 dropped out of 6th form and skipped uni, despite being highly intelligent, she almost certainy has Aspegers but has no Dx.

I wanted to reply because your list of behaviours is sooo similar to mine for Dd3 she is 8 and is currently being assessed by CAMHS for Aspergers.

As I said no usful help on offer but you are not alone and you have come to the right place. I am sure someone with some experience will be along at some point.

Welcome anyway.

I have a v high functioning ASD step daughter who is doing fantastically at school, esp, the sciences. At the moment she wants to be a doctor. I do wonder whether the rejection and uncertainty of a drama career would be too much for an AS young woman, though as a degree course that might not be the case. Life and managing alone can be pretty uncertain, I wonder if a more academic subject might actually help - ie there are right answers, it's black and white, some certainty in life? The other thing is to just go through and train her in exactly what needs doing on a given day, ie approach her independent skills as lessons to be learned step-by-step and followed exactly. I am no expert though, just thinking aloud to when my DSD goes to uni and how we would maybe approach it.

I have been told Leicester Uni is v. good for ASD students.

Thanks that's really useful. I'll have a look at Leicester's website with DD to see if there is an open day soon.

It's not a million miles away either so that's useful. Like most parents I suppose I'd quite like her to be far enough away to be independent but near enough that we can her home if needs be.

I have just found this trailer on Youtube about the life of Temple Grandin.

I have a thread in SN Children about it, but I wanted to point it out to you OP, on your thread, as a really positive promotion of ASD. Temple Grandin was not held back academically by ASD.

I have a teen DD with AS and all the same worries as you OP, although my DD is a bit younger.

I did wonder the same as sick of re the drama? I thought drama was really draining emotionally so might cause a lot of anxiety????? I could be wrong though if your DD has a real talent for it. Also with drama there is a lot of group work, improvisation, social stuff, eye contact, sensory demands, touching etc. And working unsupervised? How does your DD cope on stage with light, noise, touch from other actors?? My DD recites whole chapters of books/scripts but could not cope with acting!

Thanks for that link visualthinking. What a remarkable woman Temple Grandin is and how fantastic that her mother wouldn't allow her to be written off.

The drama thing is what orginally made me dismiss the little voice in my head that DD may have ASD and to be fair we don't yet have a formal diagnosis, although the more I am reading the more her behaviours and reactions are slotting into place.

I've been looking into the correlation between autism (especially Apergers) and drama and it seems that for quite a number of young people on the spectrum drama is a real help because it allows them to learn appopriate and expected social responses within the structured framework of a script and gives them a character to hide behind.

I can really see this in action with DD as she is quite shy in real life situations but becomes a completely different person on stage.

She's fine making eye contact with people once she knows them well and feels she can trust them. She's also fine with touching if she knows it's going to happen, so interacting with others within the scope of a script is ideal for her as she knows exactly what's coming. The light thing is a curious one because she is really sensitive to bright sunlight or when the optian shines a torch in her eyes but she doesn't seem fazed by stage lighting. I wonder if it links to the idea that she becomes the character she is playing and so reacts exactly as the character would?

Sounds like drama is an option for your DD then wings. Did you see that programme that was on recently about teens with an ASD doing drama? Perhaps someone on here can remember what it was called? It might be on Youtube or something?

Its really interesting to me that your DD is so comfortable with drama. My DD doesn't like lots of eyes looking at her (the audience!) and finds improvisation a nightmare as there is no script. I do know some pre-teens with AS who enjoy drama though.

I hope that you will continue on the long and draining path to a dx for your DD wings. Its really hard but I think once you get there it is so worth it. My DD knows the difficulties in her life are not her fault. I'm sure it will eventually be a relief to your DD to get a dx to explain how she has experienced life so far and why certain things have happened. If its not an ASD then at least you can exclude that from your thinking and pursue other avenues to get her help and support.

Good luck wings and keep posting on this board. I'd love for SN teens to be as busy as SN children!

There is a big Hollywood film coming out soon called (and about) Temple Grandin. Sorry to hijack.
It is so great that you are getting this "sorted out" before she goes to uni. My sister, who has AS, left uni after 2 years and really hated it, couldn't cope etc. That was in the 1970s though, much has changed.