Help me! Is it autism

[gemsynermal]

My DD has just turned three and she's been undergoing speech assessments for the past 9 months. She can speak in two part sentences, can follow instructions, likes to be around other children (will play alongside them, occasionally asks what they are doing), can share, wait her turn, sings nursery rhymes to her little sister, has no sensory issues and can sleep solidly for five hours, however...

She still repeats back most things I say to her (always in context as in 'want a juice', she'll say 'want a juice'), she mostly ignores me when I call her name, she talks only when she wants to in that she won't answer open ended questions, she's never ever said the word 'yes'. She struggles with eye contact, if I ask her to wave goodbye, she'll say 'wave goodbye' and not actually wave.

I feel like she mostly operates in her own little bubble and only occasionally lets us in. Sometimes I get glimpses of this lovely sociable interested little girl and other times it's as if theres nothing behind the eyes. She's very affectionate and cuddly and loves me to pieces and I'm desperate to know more about what's going on in my little daughters head.

Has anyone got children who are similar? Can you help me?

I knew there was a theoretical risk of autism with DS because his Dad was diagnosed with Asperger's as an adult. I genuinely thought there was no sign of it for at least 2 years. I started getting a bit concerned about his attention around the age of 3. He's bright, chatty and affectionate, has intense interests, struggles with some social skills, food, sleep and anxiety are problem areas.

He's now in Reception, it's not been a good year for him. After months of encouragement I eventually and reluctantly applied for DLA for him. We're waiting for formal NHS assessment but as things got more and more difficult I decided private assessments would help me start doing some of the right things at home. We're in the middle of that process now so, as yet, no diagnosis but also no doubt that there's something going on.

I really am battling with my own denial.

The reason I'm saying this is because getting support for myself by gradually engaging with a local support organisation and looking for and accepting help from wherever possible has made all the difference. I'd suggest that, odd that it may feel, don't wait for a definite diagnosis before looking for local support groups. There are lots of fantastic expert parents willing to share their experience and knowledge including lots of fun activities suitable for the particular needs and interests of your child.