Please make it stop :-(

[Laubs]

Make it stop. Someone pass me the wine..... Anything to make the screaming stop. Our life feels completely ruined by one 8 year old high functioning ASD boy. Everything good in our life is ruined. There are literally no good moments... Not in a long time.. he doesn't go to school (He's been expelled and the council can't find him somewhere suitable) he doesn't sleep (pediatrician prescribed meds that do nothing) he won't get up when he needs to, go to bed when he needs to or anything else that involves him being asked to do anything.

You can't have a family meal, go out to a restaurant, play a board game...

There's literally nothing we can do to enjoy life as a family or enjoy our childs company.

His sister gets shouted at just for winding him up, which she does often, and we always feel guilty for shouting but if she doesn't stop it, he goes crazy.

I feel that the light at the end of the tunnel has gone out. I have no family apart from my 80 year old dad who lives with us and doesn't get autism at all and is probably autistic himself as he has no social awareness.

I'm rambling, I know. But I've been unable to eat tonight because the screaming over nothing hasn't stopped in hours and I just think, could I call social services. Could they make it all to away. And then I cry because how can you think that? How can you not love your own child?

I can't cope. He can't cope. Our family can't cope. And there is no god damn help from the council, they don't care that he's not in school and we're struggling.

He said to me when he was expelled from school that he wished he didn't exist. That no other kids have to cope with this.

It was heartbreaking. He can't make friends, just gets picked on and the anger and outbursts just yet longer and more frequent.

Pointless rant just to get it off my chest and make me survive another few hours.

I won't ask if it will get better because I know that it won't. This is my life.

Your ASD team is a group of professionals with an interest and experience in treating children on the ASD spectrum.
I'm not UK but here it is (usually) Psychology, Occupational Therapy and Speech and Language Therapy +/- Paediatrician.
There would usually be access to a Dietician, Play Therapist, Child Psychotherapist...depends on the individual child's needs.

Is there any way that you can assemble a "team" by having some private sessions?

Yea, nothing like that here. Everything has to be arranged through pead or GP unless you're rich maybe. I'm definitely not, but not on a low enough income to qualify for any help. You have to be living on beans and toast every night to get help 😂😂

Not true for short breaks , and I would definitely contact the children's disability team to ask for an assessment. Your other child could attend Young Carers for example.

laubs, actually the social services has a duty of care to your family, especially as your son has special needs.

he WILL have a designated social worker - not a child protection social worker, a disability social worker.

You need to ring social services and be firm. He needs respite. YOU need a break.

In the meantime yyou need to enforce an extremely rigid routine that suits YOU. He will hate this but he hates everything anyway, so it doesn't matter right now. I would advice he has aset hours for access to technology and that you make these hours 6am to 7.30 am, and the whenever suits you in the evening but only for an hour or so. (if screen time is a thing he feels he enjoys and needs)

At the moment he is not a happy boy. My ds1 has always struggled being out of school at holiday time because he's out of the measure of his days, I imagine if school is 'never' and the rest of his time is spent twitchy, exhausted and angry (and at the moment potentially too hot and dehydrated as well) it leads to horrible behaviour.

In September start ringing round specialist schools. In the meantime ring his social worker and tell them he hasn't got an EHCP, therefore no school and leading to family breakdown