I'm not sure where to start, so I'll start from the beginning - this may be very long. Apologies in advance.
DD is 11.7 and we've always had little things with her development.
She didn't sit until seven months, but then sat for two hours straight.
She was a later walker - had physio and had to wear special boots - two before she walked.
Her speech was poor and unintelligible - we thought it was down to glue ear - grommets fitted at age four - speech therapy from age three until she was seven.
As a little one everyone said how bright she was but then she lagged behind massively with reading and writing at school - finally put on the dyslexic pathway at the end of year three.
At the end of year three my school loving little girl said that she didn't want to go to year four as it would be her last year in 1st school (three tier system).
By the October half term of year four she was physically clinging to me screaming at the start of school. The deputy head suggested that I take her in to 'help the teacher' ten minutes before the start of school. We started a long process of me withdrawing. First I took her into the classroom to her lovely teacher, then just to the doorway, then to the end of the corridor etc. etc. School were amazing and they supported her massively with transition to the middle school (which is on a shared site).
Year five was better than expected - she had an amazing teacher who offered massive support and DD really clicked with. However the nightly stomach ache, which started in Y4 continued and homework was an enormous battle with what I can only describe as meltdowns - not a tantrum. DD would be totally out of control, curled up in a ball under the dining table screaming and crying. School didn't see any of this - they saw a hardworking, happy child but agreed to put pastoral support in the form of THRIVE in place.
Y6 was horrific for the whole family. Every evening DD would have terrible stomach pains, be anxious to the point of hyperventilating and finally fall asleep in our bed. DH would then have to carry her through to her own bed when he came up. Homework resulting in screaming, shouting, more meltdowns under the table. THRIVE practitioner at school was lovely and tried to support as much as possible. Teachers overlook incomplete homework etc as they knew how hard she worked at school and we kept them up to speed with home. Finally, the decision was made to withdraw DD from the English portion of the SATs but to get her to sit the maths - this helped her anxiety go down a little and she was thrilled when she passed it.
Now, we are in Y7 - THRIVE practitioner has left.
DD is 11.7 and has a reading age of eight, but is secure in the majority of subjects, which is testament to her "fabulous work ethic" and perseverance. I am immensely proud of her but something is not right.
On top of the educational problems and anxieties she is anxious about loud noises and always has been - she wore ear defenders to school discos when little, hates change with a passion.
She has known that we are spending Christmas at my IL's for a year but is still struggling to come to terms with it - "but we always have Christmas at home - that's how we do it!".
If we say, "Yeah, we'll do that tomorrow", then as soon as we wake it is a constant, "When are we doing it, can we do it now?".
Her school shoes have been the same style for the past three pairs, she won't have new trainers (which she desperately needs) because "they aren't comfortable", her leggings have to be a size 8 or she won't even try them on. If she thinks something looks uncomfortable she won't try it or feel it. We've had meltdown in M&S because she couldn't find anything comfortable.
She can't keep up with conversations with groups of her friends, either on chat or face to face.
I could go on, but I've probably bored everyone. I have a doctor's appointment tomorrow, alone, to discuss DD. It's not worth taking her along as she seems to put a mask on when around others - only immediate family see her behaviours. How do I get the GP to take me seriously. When I've been before they have prescribed antacids for her stomach and that's it. :(
If you have got this far, thank you for taking the time.