Learning disability and autism

[Heytheredelilah1987]

Hi there

We had our first paediatrician apt for our son who is just 2 yesterday. The paed said it's very likely our DS has autism (which we expected ) and a learning disability. When I queried the LD she said he's too young to tell, but he's behind by around a year with communication and speech- obviously the full assessment will determine his exact diagnosis.

I'm just a bit worried as I didn't expect the LD. Is this a common part of children with autism?

One think that in a weird way annoys me, dds paed writes "xxxx is an able little girl". She is obviously compared to many children seen at the CDC, and compared to her starting point..BUT it confused nursery. They expect her to be a super bright aspergers stereotype as she's "high functioning" but dd compar d to mainstream peers does not keep up well, listen in a group and is different. It does her no favours, she can generally cling on to the lower expectations but she isn't "able" in the way an educational setting defines able. Able in the CDC means more "doesn't have a clear huge delay"

My DS is 2 (28 months). He is still very little and people keep saying 'a lot can change in the next year' which is great, but he is definitely on the spectrum, I have no idea where he will be IQ, functioning wise. Some days he seems so far from typical and other days I think if he can get his communication improved he could be high functioning.
It's all just labels, in the end he is just my beautiful little DS.

2boys - I too struggle with the not knowing. A lot.
I've heard of ABA. Will look into it more over the coming months. Glad it's working so well for you guys.
Zzz - my son is only 2 so he doesn't say a lot anyway ... I'm unsure how that'll go for him when the assessment takes place, but I'm assuming not very well? Though I imagine they'll take into account his age obviously ! I think it's very unfair that language delay can impact the assessment for their overall iq...

At 28 months my dd had no words, a bit of a big passive baby. Seemed delayed to varying degrees in all areas, even sitting in mess without a quirm or hovering round me. Funny, unless I recall I've clearly chosen to forget!

At that age my dd Tbf could only score for motor skills whilst watching her wander/ fiddle as she didn't acknowledge tasks or the examiner. I remember being shocked she carried on with a snack when lifted up and examined, no protest at all, limp to test reflexes. Zero acknowledgement (I now know she does this when stressed, blocks out the world). They thought she had epilepsy as nursery said she'd often lie rigid on the floor, totally unresponsive

Heytheredelilah - I was struggling a lot more with the not knowing for the first few months after I realised something wasn't quite right. Gradually I have started to accept the fact that I can't predict the future! Nobody can.
Now I am concentrating on early intervention to give DS the best chance of finding a way to understand the world. strangely I think the whole situation has made me a better mum to both him and his NT 6 year old brother. I have more patience and letting go (almost) of my previous vision of what mine and my families life would be like has been quite eye-opening.
I do still have hope that DS will maybe be independent, have a girlfriend/job/friends. But regardless, he is happy and loved!

2boys- yes, on the whole I remain positive but I still have my dark moments and for me not knowing can be the worst thing of all.

Filo- that's so funny; my son fell once and continued to eat his crisps as he fell and lay on the floor!! We all laughed , but it's little things he does like the his that make it so apparent he can seem oblivious to the world and sometimes even to his part in it physically!

I definitely still have days where I feel incredibly sad or worried.
Yesterday I must have been having a rose tinted day!!!

2boys - I think it must be the same for us all!