Echolaliac 3 year old please advise

[Chocolatdreams]

Hello

My 3 year old ds hardly speaks. He uses 1 word for most things and is very Echolaliac whereas he says sentences from books and TV shows. He also has a few lines from previous things I have said myself. He knows tons of words and can labels things and knows their names and if I tell him the name of something he needs to ask for then he will know that word from then on too.

He asks for stuff by posing the question I would ask him. So he would say "want some water?". He can ask for whatever he wants but this is how he does it! I have been trying to change asking him to "I want ........". He now does this sometimes but hardly ever but something tells me it is just a learned phrase he doesn't really understand the "I" part.

I really don't have a clue what I need to do. He has asd traits and I am so so worried.I've been reading all your threads and you guys are so amazing but I am lost with all the abbreviations and what steps I need to take.

When I take ds to soft play and other outings I feel so lonely and end up crying on the way home as he seems so behind. I know crying won't help. I've been trying to get him a private speech and language therapist and it's been proving a bit hard as I am new to the area and don't have any recommendations and worry about choosing the wrong one. I am a single mum and don't have any friends or family in the area and I just feel so bad like I have done something wrong. I know this can't be true if he has asd but I keep thinking maybe he used the ipad too much instead of taking him out to groups and letting him interact more.

We had an appt with NHS speech and she will give him 4 sessions in March and referred him to a paediatrician for social interaction. That is also in March despite her saying there would be a 6 month wait so I am really happy about that.

His traits are as follows:

Hitting self in head
Saying same sentence over and over
Hardly any pretend play
Scrunching face squinting eyes
Has eye contact when you call name but if you are talking.
Watches hands a lot I even wonder what is so fascinating.
Laughs at stuff I have no idea about lol
Claps hand really hard when frustrated ( this could be normal but it is the way he does it and this swaps between doing this and hitting head)

He understands most of what I tell him to do and if I show him once he can then do it.

He doesn't have any conversational speech. I get down on the floor and if I talk too much during play he gets up and finds something else to do lol. When I say talk to much I keep it simple. I have reduced my language to 2 or 3 words at a time

Any advice please?

Oh yh he starts nursery next week but has been home with me otherwise

Oh man zzzzz. Those thing's sound like you want me to climb a mountain nearly as big as everest but I like it gives me a great place to start.

He can tell me if something is too hot. If it's too cold he just doesn't want it but doesn't say. Will say more or no more doesn't use less. Has even taken to saying no more when he doesn't want me to play with his toys as well and can say don't want it.

Probably will only do 2 part commands that he is motivated by meaning it's something he really wants to do. Thanks for giving me some ideas to work on.

bananas your son sounds amazing seems he has come a long way and certain things sound very similar with my boy. I know exactly what you mean about if it's even helping then he will surprise me so I know he is taking it in. I will keep at it. Everyday I keep at it. This board is very motivating too to come and read the posts.

polter thank you for recommendation. I was lucky enough to find pdf for the book 'the out of sync child' and also 'the out of sync child has fun' which is the second book so will try to give them a read. Still have to look for the one zzzzz was telling me about .

Thank goodNess he is starting nursery cos don't know where I would get the time to read.

Ooooooooh zzzzzzz he watched a show today and pointed at the TV and named a couple of things so I feel a lot better about that thanks. He has a new phrase but I have no idea where it came from and it's not the TV. It's so strange he can pull out a phrase from months back that he only heard once. I say strange it's quite amazing.

I also got a few ideas of what to teach him from a couple aba lesson plans so I feel much more confident and not so helpless like I did before I made this thread!

I just wanted to add he has never ever called me mummy but he knows that is who I am. He also has never said yes. But can sure as hell tell me no and no more. I've read lots of people say this does anyone know the reason behind it?

I have started to show him my picture a lot on my phone and telling him mummy and today I asked him whose that and he said 'mummy' (yes i was in floods of tears. Not for him to see i dont want him thinking it's a bad thing. I don't think he even understands crying) I am hoping it clicks for him soon.

How long did it take before you were called mummy if this is something you went through?

Hello. I know it’s a long shot you will even see my post, as it has been a long while, but I am going through the exact same thing with my son and was wondering if you could post an update on how have things been and if you found what helped at the end? Thank you!

Hi @ZigZagZ I'm not the original poster but my DS fit much of that description at that age or thereabouts (he's just turned 4 now). Ours is a good news story - though we're still not caught up on his speech quite yet!

He's still echolalic but producing more and more original speech (and does indeed call me mummy - I think some time around 3.5yo?) A really great resource for kids who use delayed or immediate echolalia (so, many or even most kids with ASD) that's working for us is an online resource/training course you can do on this website called Meaningful Speech www.meaningfulspeech.com/ they've also got an instagram page with really useful bite sized chunks of of info to get you started.

In a nutshell, the course explains the DC's path to learning language and how you can work with the echolalia to help them get to original, flexible language. The whole thing is super positive and if your DC is speaking or even vocalising at all, then according to this speech therapy approach, you've got your foot in the door and have plenty of reason to be optimistic. When I found it I immediately recognised my DS in what they were describing, and have found the approaches really easy to implement so far. He's not quite there yet with full, flexible speech but he's definitely progressing so stay optimistic!