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Here are some suggested organisations that offer expert advice on special needs.

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Here are some suggested organisations that offer expert advice on special needs.

SN children

Why are they laying into Fanjo here?

85 replies

StarlightMcKenzie · 06/05/2013 11:42

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/a1748661-To-tell-my-friend-I-cant-see-her-because-of-her-3-yo-dd#38895441

OP posts:

Report

DisAstrophe · 07/05/2013 08:55

Hi fanjo. Slight hijack. I was on a first aid course last week. They said that ALWAYS after the hiemleck (sp) you need to take the person to hosp to be checked. This is because internal damage can be done.

Sorry to worry you - perhaps call nhs dirct to check?

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 07/05/2013 11:14

I know..I only realised that late last night, but realised DD must be OK as she ate 2 large platefuls of dinner then was laughing giggling and running around for hours.

I don't think he did it too hard.

But thanks, will keep a very close eye on her.

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 07/05/2013 12:07

It's off again, you cannot mention possiblity of SN and must assume all children are hideous vile brats.

I am kind of scuppered not being able to mention SN, having one DD who has SN.

StarlightMcKenzie · 07/05/2013 12:20

SN is like the elephant in a room.

People often quote 'excepting SN' as the end of the debate about SN in a kind of 'please don't make us talk about/think about it as I'd rather pretend it doesn't exist'.

People say thingsl like 'He definately didn't have any SN' in a way that allows them to carry on with their lives without SN impacting/impinging.

IMO that child had SN. Whether it stems from poor parenting, a disability, a mother who has some social difficulties of her own or whatever, SO WHAT. The child is 3 years old. Give them a fecking chance. Give them a fecking hand.

OP posts:

AmberLeaf · 07/05/2013 12:22

It is such bollocks isn't it.

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 07/05/2013 12:31

Yes..I keep bringing the elephant into the room and people don't like it.

They wouldn't like living with a fecking great elephant in room either methinks

StarlightMcKenzie · 07/05/2013 12:39

No. It makes some people uncomfortable and it puts them in the wrong for being smug about their superior parenting/children/education/morals etc.

If one in 88 children are now dx with ASD, then there are a blimmin lot of them. Add to that the other disabilities and it is fairly safe to say that most, if not all of the children who lack in social skills/awareness have something going on. And some of them will have shit parents, but most of them will have normal parents, with normal but increasingly stressful lives and some will be able to also parent in a style that brings out the best in their children, but plenty will not.

And this 'inability' is going to increase as families that have a disability are starved of more and more time and money. Being shunned and isolated may protect poor precious children of the Smuggers, but not when their generation has to then fund the mental health units, insitutions, increased prison placements and general increased levels of crime as a result of their intolerance now.

OP posts:

2old2beamum · 07/05/2013 13:13

I would rather our elephants than any of their precious brats

bochead · 07/05/2013 13:49

Social skills? The adults on that thread seem VERY lacking in basic empathy. I've yet to meet a 3 year old who was beyond redemption.

At what point in time did it become morally OK to start ostracising toddlers? I'm so glad I missed that particular Orwellian memo.

Somewhere along the line our society took a truly terrible turn for the worse as we collectively ditched compassion. I agree wholeheartedly with Star. I also worry that unless societal atitudes change and fast the millennium boomer generation reaching adulthood is going to cause massive negative waves throughout every section of society as these alienated, maladjusted young people lash out collectively in reaction to the awful predjudice they endured during their formative years.

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 07/05/2013 14:07

It is depressing.

I have given up on the thread now..my only hope is that they just the embarrass themselves.

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 07/05/2013 14:08

Excuse bad typing..on wobbly bus

StarlightMcKenzie · 07/05/2013 14:13

Fanjo, you know what. It doesn't matter if you haven't changed their minds on the thread. People don't like to admit they are wrong, but maybe, just maybe, them or other people who are reading will consider things they never have before as a result of your efforts.

I was explaining to ds' school a couple of days ago that I am absolutely delighted at how much his language has advanced, but also gutted, because as his language improves the gaps become more obvious in his development. It's a bit like that when you go out to the RL threads. Don't focus on the gaps in development that have been highlighted by that thread, focus on the fact that the issues have been raised and there has a been a voice for our children.

OP posts:

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 07/05/2013 14:29

That sounds sensible.

I think your DS has advanced amazingly well by the way, remembering your old posts about him and comparing them to the latest ones about things he says and does :)

MummytoMog · 08/05/2013 11:57

I only got a couple of posts in before I realised they could have been describing DD and decided that I was going to avoid that thread like the plague. I'm sure there are some people who avoid us because of the way DD can behave. They can bog off and take their automaton children with them.

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 08/05/2013 12:03

I see there's another thread with people mentioning violins when people mention SN.

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 08/05/2013 12:14

Am just going to play "belittling bingo" and see how many ways they use to put us back in our box if we mention our kids.

Already had "playing the violin"

"Being PC" ..'have to use the right keywords"....

Tick tick

ouryve · 08/05/2013 12:37

That OP has form, Fanjo.

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 08/05/2013 12:39

Ah..

Really feeling for people with kids in mainstream who have ADHD, if they read some of the posts :(

AmberLeaf · 08/05/2013 12:52

Where is this other thread Fanjo?

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 08/05/2013 12:56

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/1750549-To-think-that-no-child-should-be-allowed-to-ruin-the-learning-of-29-children

ouryve · 08/05/2013 13:00

Really feeling for people with kids in mainstream who have ADHD, if they read some of the posts

Quite. Hence my school dinner dig.

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 08/05/2013 13:02

Yes, touche there I thought!

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fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 08/05/2013 13:04

Mind you if people are so obnoxious and rhino hided they would call people talking about their child's difficulties as "playing the violin" then nothing will get through to them and it's best to ignore and file under "beyond redemption" :)

Dinkysmummy · 08/05/2013 13:10

Wow....

It's nice to see society has grown in the last 100 years

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 08/05/2013 13:11

There are a few decent people coming out of the woodwork there though, thankfully!

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