I am a bad teacher - confession

[fisil]

I feel dreadful. I just tried an ambitious lesson with my bottom set year 9 - without my teaching assistant too. We were making 2D & 3D Xmas decs.

I lost my cool with a girl with mild cerebral palsy. She did not listen to any instruction, either when I was explaining what to do to the whole class, or when I was explaining to her individually step by step. So I acted out my emotions instead of doing my job and trying to help her.

Instead of understanding that she finds spatial stuff like this really hard, I ended up shouting at her. I rarely shout because I hate it and it doesn't achieve anything anyway. I just felt so fed up with her because she just didn't seem to be trying at all, and because I was at a loss for what to do.

I feel really really bad. I just wanted to let you all know how bad I feel, and how I feel I make a mistake, because I often read about people's frustrations with teachers on mumsnet, and in this case you can have the teachers side - and it is that I feel totally awful!

You're only human and we're all allowed to lose out tempers and make mistakes and stuff sometimes, the fact that you feel so bad shows your a good person.
Lots of love - Thomcat xx

You'd be a bad teacher if you did that without a second thought, and all the time. Your only human we all loose are patience sometimes, you sound lovely to me just from feeling so guilty and having remorse. Don't be too hard on yourself, i snap at my children and i love them dearly we're not saints or superheroes (well not all of the time anyway )

You are only human fisil. It is difficult week at school this week as it is. You feel bad and guilty - it shows you do care and it was a one off . You are not a bad teacher at all becase you do care. I think you now need to just move on and the next lesson, I am sure, will be just fine with her.

You are all so nice, I love Mumsnet. I did need a pick me up, so thanks very much.

But I didn't say this just to get lots of nice comments (although I'm not saying no) but because I think sometimes we are quick to get annoyed with our kids teachers/carers when in fact they could be feeling equally bad about it.

I suppose I'm saying always communicate ... if my girl went home tonight and told her Mum, she would be livid with me, but if her Mum just picked up the phone straight away, she'd find that I was also livid with myself!

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A bad teacher would have gone about their business without giving the matter a second thought. I get annoyed and shout too - and I'm only responsible for 2 children.

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Fisil, I used to teach and thought I was good but I made loads of mistakes too. Teaching is the most stressful job in the world (official statistics from H&S Exec!!) so it is not surprising we lose a bit of self-control once in a while. And Year 9 are the most difficult group to teach IME. Dont beat yourself up about it.

hey fisil, I'm a teacher and have lost it with kids too.It is just such a tough and exhausting job, but someone's gotta do it, hey? btw maryz I have no problem with apologising to kids when I have shouted that bit too loudly or got that bit too angry.I don't see it as losing face at all - in fact I have found it gains you respect from the pupils.Not that it happens too often!PS year 8 are my most difficult year IME !!

Yes, I will apologise. I usually do it there and then, and usually find it gets a great response from the student. Unfortunately I don't see her again til Thursday. I'll try and find time to go and see her tomorrow.

Thanks ladies, you have lived up to expectation!

Yes, I will apologise. I usually do it there and then, and usually find it gets a great response from the student. Unfortunately I don't see her again til Thursday. I'll try and find time to go and see her tomorrow.

Thanks ladies, you have lived up to expectation!

I have apologised in the past if I have snapped at a kid when it wasn't totally warranted!
They are normally great about it.
I agree that it is a very tiring and frustrating job sometimes, particulary this time of year when EVRYONE is tired and stress and the kids want to be excited and entertained!!
Don't get too upset - you are human and allowed to get cross sometimes!!

If it helps, you also have my sympathy. I had to send a boy with ADHD out of the class room today, and that was with a TA with me. His behaviour was getting to danger point so I had to send him out of the room to calm down. I didn't lose my cool with him and calmly told him that he could come back in when he had cooled down a bit. His behaviour continued to deteriorate (at one stage I did think that he was about to hit me, he is a big lad in year 8 and towers over me). In the end the class ended and he tore his book up, and threw it sound the playground. I feel so sorry for the poor kid, I know he had major problems and have reason to believe that he has stopped taking his Ritalin. But in the end I had to consider the well being of the rest of the class, and the boys own safety. Still doesn't stop me feeling like a failure thought.

Have a hug from me Fisil, and join me ina glass of wine tonight.

fisil, I don't want to be a meanie but if I were this child's mum and I heard what had happened I would NOT be pleased. Chances are the mum won't hear about it. You are a professional and shouting at your own kids as a parent is not the same as shouting at a pupil in your class.

Having said that, before you all start bashing hard on the keyboards, I can completely understand how it can happen and you must be feeling awful. As others have said, the fact that you feel awful means a lot and show that you ARE a good and caring teacher. SEN kids need teachers who can grow and learn with them and who keep going rather than giving up on them. You would be a loss to this child and the others in your class.

Davros, I'm glad you said that. You're not a meany, our children are the most important thing to us, and we put our trust in the professionals.

That is really why I brought it up here, so that next time any of us hears something like this from our little ones and is (quite rightly) not pleased, we can remember that maybe the teacher is just as displeased, and wanting to learn from it. I know that not all teachers are the same, but most of us do feel like this!

Agree, we are all human and we all have limited patience don't we? But it doesn't stop us feeling bad about ourselves if we give in on occassions.

Also, there's nothing worse than someone, teacher or otherwise, who thinks they're never wrong. The biggest problems are not with people who make mistakes or people who don't know something, but those who don't know they don't know iyswim...!!