aspergers tendencies

[rummum]

I don't know if you remember but the EP said daughter had aspergers tendencies.

At parents evening daughters teacher said that for daughter to move up a 'level' in English she needs to be more discriptive... ie.. daughter will write I walked in the wood.. the teacher needs to know what the woods was like and how she was feeling... I asked if this could be part of her aspergers tendencies, and she said it could be... (could it??) Now daughter doesn't do small talk let alone talk about her feelings! so i imagine she would find this hard..I feel that the school should be supporting her in this area.. as it obviously doesn't come easy to her... Also she needs to learn about emotions and feelings...

How have your children learnt these things??
has their school been supportive??
do your children have a statement

I have an appointment with the head tomorrow morning...
any advice will be appreciated

Rummum

it seems that a lot of schools vary in this. for example, at Sam's last school he got help without a statement (2 hours social skills a week plus loads of other stuff, once they spotted a problem) yet now he has a DX (as) he doesn't get anything (new school, he's yr1 BTW). School very reluctant to acknowledge dx, to put it mildly... even though he isn't progressing and spends luchtimes hurting other children.

the only way, I am afraid, is to turn into a pushy cow! Which unfortunately I am anything but and have therefore got nowhere , but i am sure you are infinitely better than me at allt his

I agree with peachy, you have to be pushy. It doesn't make you popular but it can make a difference.

Of course another alternative is to find another school. With ds we had to do this because his old school were so useless and made things so much worse for him we just couldn't leave him there.
His new school are great and I know that even without a statement they would still provide him with good support.

Contact IPSEA and ask their advice. They were really helpful to me last year. They can be hard to get hold of sometimes but persevere because they really do know their stuff.

Before your paed appointment try making a list/diary of dd's problems and behaviours that you are concerned about and give examples if you can.

Check out the stas for your school too to get an idea of how helpful it could be... for example, despite a role call of 300 or so, my school mysteriously doesn't have one SN statement... hmmmmm

I would be really tempted to move her but she only has one year left... she's in year 5 now and I don't think she would cope that well with the change...
I would rather have her happy and failing that unhappy without friends but learning more.. if that makes sense...

would the LEA tell me what help she could get??
maybe I could just mention that the school are at a bit lost in how to 'help her'... and could they give the school some direction.... oohhhhhhh

I agree you need to be more assertive and read up on procedures,

The Special Education Needs Code of Practice gives guidance to state schools, LEA's and anybody else that helps to identify, assess and provide help for children with SEN. It sets out the processes and procedures that all these organisations MUST or should follow to meet the needs of children. They must not ignore the guidance in the Code. They must also take account of the Code when they write their SEN policies.
You can get free copies of the SEN Code of Practice from the Department of Education and Skills on DfES website

I would start by asking the school for a copy of their SEN policy (may make them take you more seriously) HTH

Guess what now.............

Daughter has an appointment with the child and adolescent mental health service (CAMS) on Monday 28th November.....

It gives a list of the clinical staff and they have a lot of qualifications between them so I'm sure one of them can diagnose her!!

This appointment was actually made a while ago because daughter hated herself and wanted to kill herself... could this be part of the aspergers tendencies where she finds it hard to express her emotions/feeling and only lets us know when she's rock bottom??

Rummum

Ooh, luxky you- we've been waiting since June to see Paed, appointment 23rd December.

I don't know if that is related to the inability to express emotions part, or is a result of feeling isolated. I am reading this book at the moment, very good insight for me into how Sam thinks, 'pretending to be normal' by Liane Holliday Willey, published by Jessica Kingsley Publishers. It might help you?

Hi Rummum! I have an 8 yr old ds who was dx a few years ago with Aspergers and ADHD. He had no support or help at his old school so I moved him to a school a few miles away.

He doesn't have a statement there either but they are very good with him.

Because of self harming in the past and saying he wishes he was dead etc, he has been attending CAMH for over the past year. I'm not certain, but I don't think that they can diagnose? I'm sure someone will come along and correct me if i'm wrong shortly though.

The very best of luck and yes, I too am a pushy mum, it really is the only way to get listened to.

Peachy- i read that book u r reading,its what made up my mind that i was AS

As far as a dx is concerned I think it depends who is on the CAMHs team. Our paed is the consultant paed for community child health and as such he is part of the CAMHs team and he can make a diagnosis. Its doubtful that they will make one straight away though - I expect what will happen is that they will refer her on for an assessment. My ds is on the Aspergers team's lists but won't get an assessment until he is 7.

Good luck with it all. It happened a bit like this with us- nothing for ages and then everything came at once and we had appointments left, right and centre until I felt dizzy and couldn't remember who I had told what. That's why i now write the lists so that i don't forget to mention something important