Autistic kids are weird but clever

[Jimjams]

Ds1 had one of his moments today when he stuns me.

He loves looking through home magazines. This week I've bought him three, we've looked through one at the dentist (where he sang happy birthday to a big chocolate cake) and about 10 days ago we flicked through about 5 at Mum and Dad's house. We've also looked though the local paper house bit together and he's been looking at his nursery manager's house details (she's moving).

Today we went back to mum and dad's- they have about 60 magazines beneath their coffee table on this storage tray thing. I picked up one at random. Ds1 immediately started shouting mmda mmda (hoover) I was flicking through looking for hoovers and the screaming was getting louder while he was trying to turn the pages. 2/3rds of the way thorugh there it was- a double page spread on hoovers. Instant smiles and 5 minutes of looking at hoovers.

How on earth did he remember there was a double page spread on hoovers in that magazine? He knew exactly what he was looking for. Dh is happy as he says it means he will be good at chess His visual memory is ridiculous.

I wonder where the spectrum starts - if it is a spectrum then there must be some people who are almost totally 'normal' but I don't think it works like that. Anyway I guess it helps me remembering things like that as I know how ds feels at times.

My ds used to hum incessantly about 8 months ago which was about 5 months before he started talking. He would also make other noises almost non stop at times. Drove me mad! He is also very fidgetty, and never keeps still - which also drives me mad ...

i used to do puzzles picture side down which i've heard is something that 'they' can do
i am very sensitive to smell and am a very 'touchy feely' person- and will often 'have ' to smell or feel something
people are always saying that i 'take things the wrong way'- i feel i am very literal
i find disruptions to my day disturb me (remember my ranting about the lining up/fence built at school....well it was me that was affected the most
and to add the icing on the cake ihave always been described as 'chatty,scatty,a shot away and from another planet'!...and up till i learnt about autism i used to joke that "i'm happy in my world....its just other people that are the problem"...but finaly after years of mental health issues i am about to begin a year long/weekly session with a psychologist so am hoping that i get some answers ...as despite the antidepressants i still feel 'like i am in my own world'

Eulalia- when ds1 was 2 I used to think he was the normal side of the auti/NT boundary iyswim. Oh how wrong I was!

err mrs forgetful you do sound a bit auti Have you read martian in the playground by clare sainsbury? Or the curious incident of the dog in the nightime (is that the right title?). You;d probably enjoy them. I think I am turning autistic having lived with one for a few years. I'now find myself "you can't put that there- he'll go mad", or I can't move the car an inch and get out, or I'm always searching for trigger points. Dinosaur you sound like ds1 with music. Talking fo which I got kicked in the face this morning and had my broken toe stamped on by ds1 as he missed the theme tune to winnie the pooh.

Jimjams, I wondered about Tourette's with my son too at one time and asked the paed who said he didn't think so and what would we do differently anyway? I do know a boy, now about 13, who I've known since he was about 5 who has a diagnosis of Tourette's and he is medicated (doesn't seem to be too successful!).
One way it might be useful in the future, I don't know what level of DLA you are on but, if you want to push for a higher level an "extra" diagnosis does help or you can use it to ask for a change between the times that they ask you to reapply. Anyone who wants to try to get a higher rate, if you can think of any extra dimensions to your child's condition that can be labelled, it will help, e.g. hyperactivity, dyspraxia, tourette's etc

we get higher rate care anyway. No mobility yet- I'll claim when he's 5. I didn't think there would be much point in getting a dx, and I don't want to use medication. I know some adult autis who said all their tics etc got better as they got older.

dinosaur- no geegeen dh trod on it! It was a while ago- it's fine - I just can't move it!

To be honest though, I didn't even bother to mention the Tourette's on my DLA form. It doesn't really seem very relevant - in as much as it just happens and it is no extra work for anyone (although mighty irritating).

mrs forgetful - I hope you get things sorted out - I think it must be worse for an adult to deal with these issues. I have had people say to me "I don't like your husband" which hurts. Of course autism was barely known about in his day.

I am going to ask about Tourettes at ds's assessment next month as I caught him doing the nodding thing again today although he used to be a lot worse... haven't applied for DLA as I don't think he is 'bad' enough but will also ask about this at the assessment.

One thing I may push for is a disabled sticker for the car so I can park nearer shops and particularly nursery. At the moment we have to park opposite the school on the wrong side of the road. Although there is a gate at the school entrance, often at the end of the session ds often runs off (he can run very fast) and pushes his way past people and gets through the gate and runs across the road to the car. I've been told we are not allowed to use the school car park but I may raise this matter again and see if they will make a special case for him.

Eulalia, you are very unlikely to get a blue parking badge without it being connected to DLA although it can be done in some circumstances (my bil who had a stroke for instance got one immediately). In a similar way to statementing, it isn't just a matter of getting funding or extra money for X,Y or Z but its getting access to things at all, you simply don't qualify unless you're in the rotten system. I really think you should apply for DLA, you don't need to worry whether he is "bad enough", they'll decide for you and, who knows, you may get a bit of extra cash that you can spend on something to keep him occupied or happy such as computer stuff, videos etc or books to help you understand him better. Also, you are probably so used to him that you just cope, I know I did, but that doesn't mean that he isn't entitled. Mind you, I'm not sure about doing those sodding forms if its very unlikely that you'd get it. Ask at asessment as you said.

Eulalia for what you've said you should get some DLA. get help fillinf the awful thing in though- how you write it down (it has to be in dla speak) determines whether you get the cash or not.

And how rude of people to say that about your husband! Stunningly rude, blimey.

Just finished the curious incident of the dog etc- wow what a brilliant book. The narrator (christopher who has AS) desribed having to make a map of a pace every time he goes somewhere new- he has to look around at everything before he can feel settled. This is exacty what ds1 does.

Someone else mentioned it on here, was it davros?

Yes it was me! I've been droning on about it for a while. I thought it was a great book and very original although I found it sad. Christopher is nothing like my son but I thought he was brilliantly written and I could really relate to how the parents felt. It was also quite funny in places.

I laughed out loud at the footnote "but of course I would never have shreddies and tea as they are both brown".

Thanks jimjams and Davros. Yes a lot of the time I do just cope (could do with a holiday )This is his 'big' assessment which lasts 5 days (the diagnosis was made in May at a 2 hour appointment). He sees a team of therapists including a genetisist (some issues not cleared up from birth). Best of all we can stay there as it has residential accommodation! I can't wait to get him seen properly and to discuss his strenghts/weaknesses and to get the ball rolling with proper support for nursery etc.

I just read that book a few weeks back and really enjoyed it.

I've only had a couple of people say that to me jimjams in the 13 odd years that we've been together but I know others have thought it. dh often just says exactly what he thinks. He had a very difficult childhood as well so some of that overlaps with the autism. I think he is actually only mildly affected now but then again he was 44 when I met him so difficult to say how much of it was him coping with it. I try to balance things between making allowances and bringing him up particularly if he has a go at me (he can have a right temper on him). I think some things are just 'in with the bricks' and never leave you which is why it is so important to have coping strategies and for others to be aware of what is going on.

Hope it goes well Eualia We have never had a full assessment of our dd and Im sure it is much more use if you do, good luck anyway

5 days - wow- good service. I always leave those things on a high then get really down the week after- it's normal if you do. good luck!

Agree, its great to have this 5 day assessment and to have the opportunity to talk about anything and everything. BUT, it probably will take its toll too so be kind to yourself when its over

It's strange really but ever since my ds1 was a toddler,i always felt we were 'in tune' with each other- ie when one was up the other was up etc- and even now he is very sensitive to my 'moods'- also as he got older and his strugles got bigger i felt enormous pain for him as it felt real to me too- i wonder now if the reason that i feel so involved is because i've been there too- however like jimjams said i also wonder if i simply get caught up in their routines and rituals and end up making more of them in order to keep the ship afloat!Just so i don't build my hopes up about the psychologist....am i right in thinking that things like Aspergers could be picked up or will this simply be a programme offering me solutions to my difficulties- ie cognitive therepy to make me 'think' rationally etc

depends on who you see I think. People are diagnosed as having AS as adults. Somewhere I think I had a link to an online screening test for adults. I'll see if I can dig it out.

Thanks for the support It is 5-10th Oct so need to get down all the questions I need to ask. I've been quite lazy over the summer about reading up as for awhile I got sick of thinking and talking about autism and having to explain to people but that was when it was all new to us.

I am quite looking forward to it as its the only 'holiday' away from the house we are having this year. It is a brilliant centre for children with special needs set in some nice grounds. You can have a look here Raeden Centre

Thanks for the support It is 5-10th Oct so need to get down all the questions I need to ask. I've been quite lazy over the summer about reading up as for awhile I got sick of thinking and talking about autism and having to explain to people but that was when it was all new to us.

I am quite looking forward to it as its the only 'holiday' away from the house we are having this year. It is a brilliant centre for children with special needs set in some nice grounds. You can have a look here Raeden Centre

looks really good eulalia!