Anyone fancy a support thread for parents of severely autistic non verbal children?

[parrotonthesofa]

Hi!
I have a lovely 10 year old boy who is severely autistic, non verbal with a large developmental delay.
We cope ok but I feel like I have no one to talk to who really understands what it is like. I've been in various autism groups but the spectrum is so large that children with the severity of mines needs are few and far between.
He's currently having a huge meltdown, I've tried to help but he doesn't want me there so I've just had to make sure he's safe and wait til it passes. I find it so heart breaking and it all feels every Groundhog Day. Same with bedtime, it is a slog every night.
Anyone fancy joining me for a support thread?

Social care cannot say they won’t back you, they have to hear you’re struggling and - I hate to say it, but contemplating care.

With the regards to finding a PA , social care can put forward your hours to care agency , they cannot just say “find one yourself”. I didn’t know that latter piece of info till recently.

My son is very similar to yours, but 14. I openly admit to social, education and his paediatrician thatI’m waiting till supported living kicks in and the transition starts around 16/17. so I’m hanging on till then. And tbf social care are giving me hours and more respite to get there.

can you ask for more respite -once a week overnight? Don’t be put off that they say no. They honestly cannot. They can find alternative respite if the original one cannot accommodate another 2 nights a month.
To put your child in a care placement if you cannot cope will cost them more and they know this.
if respite works for your son - ask for once a week.
Also ask for a care agency for weekend hours, after school hours.

For me, I know the transition to residential, then another transition to supported living at 18 , would be traumatic for my son, so I’m hanging on.. I don’t mind telling you some days with my fingernails.

Hoping this is still an active thread?
I have a son who's 5, been diagnosed recently with autism and learning disabilities. He has recently been very aggressive and right now we don't know how to cope. I wondered if there was anything we can do or give him? Any natural supplement because the docs won't give him medication due to age. I feel that he needs something to calm him down because it's almost as if he sees red and it doesn't matter who's in his way. Some instances it's clear because he's been told no or something isn't going his way but other times it's absolutely no reason. Eg he's having dinner and will randomly get up and come and headbutt me. I am hanging by a thread at the moment.

I know this feeling.
what has worked for me is a consequence of putting my son in his own room and leaving him to calm down . I don’t engage, at this age I would direct him to his own room safe space and wait till the meltdown had stopped and go in and say no hitting. And leave the door wide open for him to come out when he had calmed down.

My son tries to head butt me at times too. I think he enjoys the sensory feedback from it. Its so awful!! He's got a huge head too so really can be quite painful.
I agree with pp, if he is having a big meltdown, I direct to his room, make sure he is safe and let him scream it out if you see what I mean. He has a big double bed so he can roll around on it, bounce, head butt it etc.
It's hard though. Hugs.
I would say though that these kind of meltdowns have reduced with age, he has more when he was 5.