slings/baby carriers - help a clueless first timer?

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Hi, I'm expecting DC1 later this year and trying to work out what to get in the way of sling or baby carrier.

I think I would prefer a baby carrier type rather than stretchy or ring sling style - for two reasons, 1 I would prefer the secure feeling of something structured/not worry about whether I have tied it right and 2 DH will probably not wear a stretchy one.

However, I have a few questions!

Can baby carriers be worn round the house (if DC feels clingy or if I do) or is a stretchy/ring style much better for this?

Is a second hand one ok or will it have absorbed lots of dribble/vom/food etc?

Can anyone recommend a baby carrier? It needs to be suitable from birth, forward or backwards facing and very adjustable (I am 5' 3 and very small framed, DH is 6'3). I would also prefer it if most of the weight was carried on my hips rather than my shoulders.

So far I am thinking of Baby Bjorn or Wilkinet but haven't really done much research.

Thank you!

In a nutshell, for the newobrn a stretchy wrap is the most comfotable and secure thing in the world IMO. I had various other strutctures/semi-structured carriers for my first 2, and finally with nr3 saw the light and got a Sleepy Wrap - fabulous. DH wouldn't use it as the colour was 'girlie' (green ).

Baby bjorns are much beloved by fathers, I did not particularly like it although easy to put on and for short periods was fine. Baby gets too heavy for me to carry at the front fairly quickly though. Ringsling is even faster and good to stuff into a bag and take along.

Overall winner for me was the Ergo which I used lots, up to (occasionally) age of 2 years. Mei-tais are another good design (only ever used a borrowed one).

Overall I did not like carrying/slining babies as much as I'd anticipated - too sweatty, too heavy quickly - but my babies taught me what they needed me to do...

Could you try and go to a sling-meet were you live?? It is really helpful if you can try something out.

Yes, baby carriers can be worn around the house.
Second hand is fine - they can (mostly) be washed.

Carriers where the baby can be on your front facing facing forward are usually not a good idea as it is mostly not particularly good for the babies joints etc, and it means they can't block out the world by snuggling into you.

DH and I used an Ergo with infant insert from birth and it was great. Be careful though, there are loads of fake Ergos about.

For good advice, and a great second hand board (which I got most of my carriers from) google "natural mamas forum"

Also, if you can, get to a local slingmeet where you can try out different styles of carriers to see what you like.

I just noticed the big height difference between you and your DH: I'd seriously consider getting a stretchy wrap for the early weeks (for you to enjoy newborn cuddles) and an ERGO for later on as it is v adjustable, but even with newborn insert I find not that comfy for a tiny baby.
And yy to getting them 2nd hand - absouletly the way to go!

I have a Mei-tai to carry most of the weight on my hips. I do however wish I had gone for a structured version instead of the tie on. I have sling envy of my friends' Beco Gemini sling, and that or the Ergo is probably what I would recommend. I did go to a sling library to try a few on, you should see if there is one in your area.

I opted for a tomy baby carrier for my DS1, but did find it uncomfortable to wear for long periods, and found that it hardly ever got used because of the strain it put on my back once he got bigger. I also worried about his head not being supported properly. I'm expecting DS3 at the momment, and I'm planning to try either the Baba Sling or Sleepy wrap this time around as they seem more versatile, spread the baby's weight better across your back, and hold the baby in a better position when newborn. I think this option would prove to be better if you want to wear it in the house as well!

well wilkinets are good, bit fiddly but my 6ft dp has used one with our 5 when they were little and if he can get to grips with it anyone can and i am 5 2 and can also use it fine, just regular length straps (they do extra long as well) you can get them easily on ebay etc.

but i really really loved my moby wrap, they are brilliant tbh i would recomend them above and beyond anything else.

ergos are good as well, tho i find it a bit cumbersome but again dp has used it happily.

oh the close carrier/sling is quite good, not wrapping and its very easy to use, but i found the fact that is was stretchy not so good once my babies were getting bigger, which mine did quickly as they were 9lb+ at birth generally.

See, people get on with different slings (see ERGO with infant insert - I don't likely, AllIsGoingToBeFine liked hers).
Nothing beats trying them out - and then you might still change your mind as time goes by!

Btw Sleepy Wrap vs Moby Wrap: they are very much the same kind of thing, basically a long length of stretchy jersey that you tie. Sleepy Wrap is allegedly a fit thicker and support a heavier baby better.
Re tying stretchy wrap: you'd be surprised how quickly you get the hang of it. I used to put mine on first thing in the morning and take it off as I went to bed, popping baby in and out as required .

Our daughter is 7w and we bought the Baby Bjorn Miracle carrier as very adjustable and most of weight on hips. It's fantastic!! Very comfy. Dm me if you need more info

Thanks everyone! Loads of helpful ideas here

I didn't know there were sling meets! I live in a very family area (though it's mostly more Gina Ford than baby wearing ) so I bet there will be one, not sure how to find it though. Do NCT run them maybe?

Will also have a look at the forums mentioned, many thanks.

The Ergo sounds like a good option, but looks quite large from the pictures I've seen - I am really quite tiny on my top half, will it swamp me?

Same question for the Moby wrap, do you need decent shoulders/chest width to use this (I have very narrow shoulders and 28 inch chest and I can imagine the material just falling off??)

Interesting what you say Fine about inward facing baby carriers being bad for joints, I didn't know that.

I'm now thinking maybe a stretchy type one for newborn stage (when I guess it will mostly be me carrying the baby not DH) and then a more structured type thing for when the LO is older and wants to face out more and getting heavier. Does that sounds like a good idea?

Puddleduck thanks, it's funny I see Baby Bjorns everywhere near me but mumsnetters mostly seem not to go for them it seems...?

Any other thoughts re Beco Gemini vs Ergo vs Baby Bjorn vs Wilkinet?

Have a look and see if you live near a sling library

www.ukslinglibraries.co.uk/

They are brilliant!!! There are so so many slings and they can be do expensive so I would really recommend going along and seeing (and trying) for yourself the different types!

You can go before you have baby as most will have weighted dolls for you to try though of course it will be harder with your bump! I rented a couple of slings before buying so I was sure! I had an inherited baby born which I loved until DD hit 4 months and my back couldn't take it anymore!

I have winced branched out and have several slings. DD is now 9 months, 18lbs and I carry her everyday with ease as we have the right sling for us! But what works for us will not work for everyone. Personally both me and my DH adore our ring sling, it's soft, snugly, perfect for around the house, small to carry in my baby bag and best of all I can feed DD in it, she falls asleep and then I can lie her down, slip the sling off and walk away without waking her! You can carry on hip and front and its 100% adjustable for different body shapes!

So go try one out! You might love it!

Outward facing carriers are not so good for joint/baby boy's genitals, particularly if used a lot.

Re narrow shoulders: that's the beauty of a stretchy wrap it fits everybody and anybody. And babies usually love being in them .

Sling meet home page
There might be one in your area?

Thanks llama! There is one not too far, but only open on weekdays when I'm at work .

Just wondering, don't you find the asymmetry of a ring sling buggers up your back?

Carriers like Baby Bjorn and Tomy etc are not good for long term use as the babies weight is all on their crotch, not healthy for them at all and a baby should never, ever be carried on your front facing outwards as their spines aren't in alignment which also causes them problems

Something like an ergo, Beco, Moby, close carrier, mei tais and the like are ergonomically safer and as they distribute your babies weight better you'll be able to use them for many more months, even years, than you would Baby Bjorn style carrier

If you want something special Melkaj custom made mei tais are incredibly competitively priced and are supremely comfortable

Maybe once you are on maternity leave you could go?

The South London Sling Library have a fab website and are on Facebook. I know that they do postal loans if that would be any use to you? Maybe to try out your top two perhaps?

I don't find the ring sling hurts my back but I only really tend to use it for short journeys, round the house etc and that tends to be for under an hour. If I'm going out for longer then I use my solar weave connecta (perfect in this hot weather) my baby hawk mei tai or a woven wrap (a sling for every occasion.... Be warned it can be addictive!!

Personally I found it hard to find a "one sling fits all" so I have a couple for different purposes. I could live with just two though, a snuggly ring sling for the house and a two shoulder something for out and about. I prefer soft structured carriers rather than baby bjorn types as I find it easier to carry my DD. Her legs wrap around me rather than just hang and once they get bigger this really helps with the comfort of the sling, makes it easier on your back, is more comfy for baby and ultimately means you are more likely to use your sling and get good value for money (not to even get started on how wonderful it is to carry your baby everywhere!)

I love my ergo, it is comfortable both front and back and long lasting. Very occasionally I still use it for my four year old (eg getting though airports on long haul trip), and it is getting more use again by my two year old as he starts to need the pushchair less.
When they were both tiny it got lots of regular use, both of them slept really well in it while I got on with house work etc.
I think if you google it you can get official ergos for about £80 and there is a list of recognised sellers on the ergo website.

a baby should never, ever be carried on your front facing outwards as their spines aren't in alignment which also causes them problems

is this true? I see loooads of babies being carried this way. They seem to enjoy it a lot so it's a shame if this is true.

Any thoughts on whether an Ergo will swamp me (v small torso/shoulders)?

I agree with stretchy wrap to start with (I had a Sleepy Wrap, now called Boba Wrap) and then soft structured carrier (SSC).

And also second the advice about outward-facing and Baby Bjorns in general.
www.bobafamily.com/blog/2011/10/11/nine-reasons-not-to-carry-your-baby-facing-out/

The Ergo is quite soft as SSCs go so fairly adjustable. But if you get a special small mei-tai or something instead it might not fit your husband. I'd go and try out an Ergo at a sling meet, or from a friend. Manducas are another good SSC but more rigid so might not fit you as well. Connectas are good in that they're quite thin and light and adjustable, but they don't have an integrated chest strap, so they're really intended to be used with crossed straps, which I dislike.

It is true that outwards facing is bad for joints.

Lots of people say that their baby enjoys facing out, but actually I'm not sure that that's entirely true some of the time. Yes, they might enjoy it for a quiet walk in the park, but once you start looking carefully, small babies in busy shopping centres etc often have a slightly overwhelmed 'rabbit in headlights' overstimulated look about them. And unlike facing in, they can't snuggle into you when they have had enough. Babies are very good at nosing about facing in, or on your back once they are older!

Agree Youlllaugh about small babies - I was thinking of older ones but I guess they're generally better off (and easier to carry) on the back by then. But can they see the world from a back carrier?

I really recommend the sling meets, I had no idea and now I am a babywearing convert :) I found I really got on with the Close Carrier

I had a tiny preemie and she loves being in the sling. I really can't see a down side, DH loves it too.

GotmyLittleLamb was it the close carrier your DD liked? I am looking for a sling for my preemie DS, he's now 7 weeks old (/37 weeks) and I want something that will support him while he's small but that also that we can use for a while yet

On DD sees so much without having to forward face.

She has the best view on my hip, looking forwards and backwards and this is her preferred position for supermarket shopping so she can have a good nosey around but equally when she is facing me or on my back she turns her head from side to side and looks out. She doesn't "know" that we are going forwards and that direct viewpoint is denied to her! She can still interact and see so much!

When it all gets too much she can turn away, snuggle into my body and sleep. Of all the forward facing babies you see being carried...how many are sleeping?

Sorry cheeser I wandered off, yep, my preemie loves the close carrier she's 6 weeks corrected but still only 7lb. She just sleeps in it, it's fab :) she's also on oxygen and I carry that on my back whilst wearing the carrier.