Tired and Desparate Mum

[Doods]

Dear All
I am new to Mumsnet and would gladly recieve advice on my 2 year and 2 month old who has a sleep pattern all of her own! Her typical day is woken by me at 8am and then off to nursery. She has 45 mins sleep at around 12.30 at that is all during the day. She will then come home, have dinner at 6.30pm and a bottle at 8.30pm and will then not go to sleep until around 10.30pm. I don't know where she gets the energy from! I am a working Mum with a partner and we just don't know what to do. We don't get anytime for ourselves at the moment and would dearly love some advice and any accounts of how others have dealt with similar problems.
Thankyou
Doods
Ps. It is lovely to know there are others out there who we can talk to.

Just to let you all know - her sleep patterns did improve towards the end of our stay at my dad's, and mine improved a lot with the arrival of dh! I slept downstairs for 2 nights, and although I could hear her, and felt guilty for ignoring her plaintive cry "I want mummy", I managed to get some semblence of sleep.
I think the whole thing was a bit of a shock, as dd1 has always been a great sleeper, no matter where she is, and I just expected dd2 to be the same. This is a mistake I'm making in lots of areas, but that's another thread.....

Again I am up in the middle of the night. Ds (15 months)has for the last couple of weeks been waking up anytime from 12am to 2am and can be awake for anything from an hour to 4 hours. He has slight ezcema and once awake he starts scratching (mainly his head which is dry) and rubbing his face (something he does when he is tired or upset). He was sleeping from around eight, sleeping till around 2am then he would come in with us, which is not too bad, but we cant go on being up most of the night. I am going to go back to the doctors asap to see if there is anything else they can give me for the itching, although Im sure we are running out of things to try (I bought the new oilatum shampoo which seemed to work but I can only use twice a week). I cant believe he woke tonight as he hasnt had a sleep all day. Controlled crying is out as I am not strong enough for that and he will just itch and rub till he is really sore. It is funny though as soon as we come downstairs or go into his nursery he stops itching. Maybe when I go back to work next week and back to a routine he may sleep better. Has anybody gone through this and does it get better. Any advice welcome.

Joe1 I take it you can't rub cream or moisturiser or anything into his scalp to stop the itching? How about aqueous cream - at least it would rinse out in the morning with water, comes in big tubs and is cheap. Ds too has mild excema but on his hands wrists ankles and face. I tend to slather his face during the day with Neutrogena handcream as it is quite greasy and as long as I remember this seems to do the trick as his face doesn't get too dried out.

Alison222 Aquaous cream seems to irritate him got diprobase now but that has made him itch today. I have got some cream called Self heal cream (a flower essence cream) which is really good for moisturising but expensive for the small jar but really has cleared his back up and has kept everywhere else at bay and not too bad. If I put anything on his head it seems to make it worse as I think he gets that horrible feeling when your hair is dirty.

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oh bum, just wrote whole long message and then forgot to send. aaargh.

basically, we have used a fab cream on our son who has eczema and it really has worked really well - he never ever itches, and eczema itself is now really mild.

Company is called VERDE, based in Hampstead in London. Cream is based on Egyptian chamomile - costs about £7 or £8 for a small pot, which has lasted us months and months. If you call them (don't have number - sorry - you'll have to try directory enquiries, that is how I found the number originally) they will recommend the best cream and will send it to you.

his itching may be stopping at nursery etc as he is distracted so doesn't think about the scratching so much.my son also has exzema and wakes frequently in the night itching we give him piriton syrup which used to knock him out but not anymore though it does still take away the itchyness.also how long is his hair, could he be getting a sweaty head which is adding to the itching.when our kids had chicken pox and were scratching like hell we used aloe vera gel on them which we kept in the fridge,it raised a few eyebrows as it was so cold but it stopped the itching,worth a try.

Thanks for the replies. I use Piriton syrup twice a day and tried all sorts from the doctors. I went in today to buy some more self heal cream and got talking the the lady in the shop. She does intolerence testing (something she got into when her son was ill) and says ds shows typical signs of yeast intolerence. As I am still feeding and had all the same symptons as a child we are cutting out bread etc as of now. Although I dont suffer from the same itching as him apparently it can change its form as you get older say to PMT or headaches. I will also, next week, take him for a test with her and see if there is anything else. Something to look into if any of you are having the same symptons as us. Its not always straight forward ezcema, maybe thats why nothing from the docs has worked.

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I'm probably teaching someone's granny to suck eggs here, but have you asked for a referal to a skin specialist, Joe1? If your GP can do nothing more, then I think it's only fair they try to get you some help elsewhere. My friend was amazed at the strategies available from the skin clinic when her two DD's were referred.

SueDonim, I have an appointment with the doctor on Tuesday and that is what I was going to push for. Im going to go along the lines of the yeast intolerance anyway, never know how long the appointment will take to come through for the specialists. Yeast intolerance can cause bad PMT, bad periods, migraines, headaches, etc etc. Im told I suffer pmt by dh so that is probably how my yeast intolerance has developed. Dont know how Im going to do without peanut butter on toast for breakfast.

Good luck with that, Joe1 and I hope you don't have to wait long. As for the yeast intolerance - I couldn't give up Marmite!

Marmite is another of our favourites on toast and very fresh bread, but I have to do it too, one to see if I have it too and second because I am stll feeding him. Forgot to mention we had a good night last night, I think I only woke up to see why he hadnt. Fingers crossed for tonight.
Robinw, I have never heard of a coffee intolerance. I dont drink much but I wouldnt like to miss out on my Starbucks coffee or such like when I go shopping, keeps me going.

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Yes please Robinw that would be great, thanks.

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Went to the docs on Tuesday but wanted to try one more thing before he puts us forward to a specialist clinic, I will give it a week or so. Saying that I tried the cream as soon as I got home not using the self heal cream and he was itching after a couple of hours. I have decided to have him tested privately on saturday for any allergies so will let you know. I would so love a night of undisturbed sleep, or even just up once, Im sure it would do ds some good too.

Joe1 - I am coming late to this thread but something you wrote got me thinking : " It is funny though as soon as we come downstairs or go into his nursery he stops itching.".... This may sound funny/weird but could you not try to explore if the reason your son scratches and wakes may be "psycholgical"... He may be stressed/distressed about something. Has there been a change in his (or yours even) life recently, does he need some king of re-assurance ?
I met with a therapist in France last month (at a party so didn't go in great details) but I mentioned to him that my son had had eczema quite badly on his face. He suggested that my son's eczema was related to a "psychological" problem I was facing at the time. Probably some kind of separation (not necessarily with a spouse but with relatives/friends) and that I was trying to deal with it... this is (according to him) how my son was reacting to it. This may or may not be (I haven't made up my mind yet) loads of baloney but I do think it is worth asking yourself the question. Also he said that once you had figured out where the separation was, you had to let your child know (litteraly by telling him) that Mummy had resolved the problem and all would be fine.....
Good luck what ever path you follow.

P.S. I am not sure that control crying would be beneficial/working in your case (from what you describe)

I've spent ages tonight looking for an article in the Sunday Times either this wek or last week about a woman who had terrible excema (can't spell) and rheumatic pain and who went to a resort at the Dead Sea as a sort of last hope. She said that the doctor there told her to just go and get in the sea and gave her other instructions which she thought were just like rest and relaxation. The effects, she claims have been rapid. Anyway the upshot is that for the first time in many years she has been free of all the symptoms. Apparently it is usual for this effect to last about 6 months. I'll try and find it for you. I was thinking more in terms of trying out a mini spa for your son, perhaps at a health clinic. did anyone else see it?

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Yes! Found it! 5 Jan Sunday Times Mag. It's called 'klimatherapy' just thought if you live near a big enough city you might be able to find a practitioner. Otherwise you'll have to go to Dr Kanan at Jordan's Zara Medical Centre on the Dead Sea! I wonder if they have a website? The article did say contact the Jordanian Tourist Board for more details. Sorry have to go, some generous soul made an appt for me at 9am and then didn't turn up to assist!

PS: just seen your message Robin - can you not buy a dead sea salts range at holland and barratt?

Pupuce, yes I have considered this and Im sure that some of the itching is because he doesnt really want to be awake and is still tired. Last night he went to sleep around 8pm while having a quick feed, I didnt expect him to fall asleep as he had slept for 4 hours up until 4pm in the afternoon. I just cuddled him as I planned an early night as we hadnt slept well the night before. When we went up to bed he woke up then wanted to play with daddy. He was back to sleep in half an hour, by then I couldnt sleep, fell asleep around 12 and he was back awake by 1.30am. We went downstairs and was there, awake, until 3.30am, scratching. In this time I tried feeding him massaging his head and back as this sometimes works, cream and washed his head. We finally went back to sleep sometime around 4.30 to 5 and back up 6.30 (and that is late) ready to go to work a 7. As you can imagine I am knackered and am so tired I think I have gone on overdrive and cant fall asleep for a quick catch up. I dont feel I have anything on my mind other than the normal day to day worries of money etc. He has loads of reassurance and cuddles and play and sleeps with us most of the time (something I want to stop when the itching is sorted). He comes to work with me so its not seperation. It is quite hectic at work sometimes as the children I look after can be very naughty and angry but he happily plays with them. I dont know and the doctors are no help. I believe something is causing it whether it be allergy or worry. I am having him tested tomorrow so we will see if that will help.
Kia, someone mentioned to me a while ago that sea water helped her dh and dd's skin problems and I did buy some sea salt and I did try to put it his bath etc a few times, maybe I should have tried longer, I will have to look in the health food shops for the treatments. Dont think the budget will stretch to a trip to Jordon right now.
Sorry to ramble on.

Joe1 I think you are absolutely doing the right thing by trying to figure out what is causing this so I do want to encourage you in that way.
When my son had eczema (quite badly on his face), a woman I had never met stopped to talk to me at the dentist and said that her son had had terrible eczema, etc. She then told me that she swore by the products from Elena Schalburg (only available by mail order I think).... As it happens I live 10 minutes from Elena so I went to see her with my son. She is a burns unit nurse and had initially developed her creams for skin problems of her patients. She has later found that they were VERY efficient on eczema. These are plant based creams. I have been VERY impressed with her products I have to say.
You can call her and discuss it with her. She sends sample so you don't have to buy anything if you are unsure. I know that people have written to the Eczema society and raved about her products but as her products are not from a pharmaceutical company and "tested" like other products might be, the society cannot endorse her but I know that they publish letters from happy users !
Her number is 01892 783 753. She makes the products in her house, I have seen her lab - very clean.
For my son I could see a major improvement in 3 days and it was seriously better within a week.
If you can resolve the itching you can then look at restoring his sleeping patterns and CC might be needed then but 1 thing at a time !

Thanks Pupuce I will keep that number to hand. I am all for natural remedies and self heal cream I am currently using is so much better than the stuff the docs gave us. Depending what comes out in the tests tomorrow (being done by a lady who is into alternative remedies and moved into this field when her son was ill 16 years ago) will decide on what action to take, it maybe something I can just remove. Poor little mite, you feel so helpless and you should be doing more. He has just fallen asleep and not an itch in sight, everything will go down now until he gets tired later on.