toddler in a bed, now up 2 hrs early!

[Rkayne]

We're expecting a baby in June, so we've just put our 2 year old in a bed to give her plenty of time to get used to it before the new baby needs the cot. It took her a couple of nights to get used to it but now she seems to really like it. Only problem is, she used to stay in bed until almost 8 and now she's getting up at 6! It's no good for me because I don't need to be up until 7, but worse, it's bad for her because by 9 she's so tired and grumpy my normally darling toddler is having temper tantrums constantly.

My husband gets up at 6 and I think she hears him and thinks she can get up too. In her cot she used to hear him but because she physically couldn't get out by herself she would just settle back down for another hour or two. The first couple of mornings in her bed she got up and came into her room by herself. So we tried letting her come into bed with me for another hour's sleep but she won't go back to sleep (she's never been able to sleep in bed with us, not since she was tiny). We've tried telling her she's not to get out of bed until mummy or daddy come to get her, which she understands. So now she sits in her bed and screams until we come for her and let her get up.

Any tips on how to get her to stay in bed for that extra hour???? She's always been such a good sleeper and this is the first time we've really had any trouble and I just don't know what to do.

This is really frightening. I was about to post a question on putting my 18 month dd into a bed. (We don't have a choice as the friends who loaned us the cot need it back for their new baby).

We do have travel cot. Would other parents recommend that we use this in stead of putting her straight into the bed? Or are we just delaying the day when she goes for a wander and get into the same situation as RKayne?

Message withdrawn

We bought a cabin/captain (i'm not sure which is correct) bed for our ds a month before our dd was born. He was 21 mo. or so. We put it into his room next to his cot. One night a few weeks later he decided that he was going to sleep in it and never went back to the cot. It has a rail around it and a little mini ladder. Although we never told him that he couldn't get out of bed without us, he didn't in the beginning. However, in the last few weeks (he's now 27 mo.), he has been getting out on his own and trundling off to the toilet. Since he can't actually go to the toilet on his own, one of us has to get up to help him. However, I'm kind of glad that he is doing this as I think it may make night time toilet training easier (he's been trained during the day for 7 months).
Rkayne, I think that you just have to wait for her sleep pattern to change again. You could try leaving some books or toys in bed with her so that she can play with them in the morning without getting out of bed. This sometime works with our ds.

Message withdrawn

Actually, I think the problem has pretty much sorted itself out - partly from a little encouragement from us and partly from ds just adjusting to the change.

Personally I don't like the idea of a gate or lock on her door because I don't want her to feel trapped in her room. There's already a bedside rail to keep her falling out of bed and a gate on the stairs to keep her from going downstairs on her own. Besides, the real problem is not disturbing us but the fact that she needs the extra hour sleep - she's so miserable when she gets up before 7:15 or 7:30.

For our part we explained to her that she shouldn't get out of bed by herself in the morning. If she wants to get up she should call for mummy or daddy and we would come get her. At 24 months she was able to understand this (mercedes - don't know if she would have had the understanding 6 months ago?). The other thing we did was change my husbands alarm clock and simply try to be a bit quieter in the mornings.

For a few days she was still waking up early and calling to us but when she got no response she settled back down for another hour or so before trying again. I never went in to check but judging by the complete silence from her room I can only assume she went back to sleep. Now, after almost 2 weeks she seems more settled and doesn't call for us until at least 7 or 7:30 or sometimes even later! Hooray. And as a result she's much more cheerful during the day as well! And so am I. :-)

Oops - did I say ds? Meant to say dd!

Mercedes - It depends on your dd. My 19 month old ds tried climbing out of his cot so we had no choice but to try him in a bed for safety's sake, he is a nightmare and we still have to sit with him until he's asleep so he'll stay in bed,, he is up when he wakes although he will sleep in our bed after 6am, he wants to be put back in his bed before 6am. He's 26 months old now. Having said that ds number 1 was about 20 months when he made the cot/bed transition and we had no problems with him!! I think you need to look at you dd's development and make your decision based on that really. Good Luck!

Tend to agree with Bloss. Maybe you could get another second hand cot and perhaps just buy a new mattress? Also, sleeping bags are quite good for curtailing climbing toddlers

A gate on the bedroom door worked very well for my first two. Unfortunately with no.3 he shares a room with ds1 who needs to get out for the toilet. Also ds2 would have climbed over the gate, just like he climbed out of the cot, which the first two didn't.

In a nutshell - depends on the child.

I've now encountered this probelm and am looking for advice.

Ds (2 1/2)is making the transition from a cot to a bed - still not complete. Thursday and Friday nights after numerous false attempts (ie ds coming out of his bedroom all excited), we ended up putting him back into his cot. Saturday night, we hooked some stretchies to the handle of the door and onto the hall cupboard, so he could only open the door an inch or two. After one attempt at coming out, we didn't hear any more, so we thought we'd cracked it - but when we went into his room to check, we found that he's climbed INTO his cot, and was sleeping under all the soft toys (including a giant hippo!) that we had piled in there to get them off the floor. Sunday night he stayed at his grandparents, so was in the travel cot.

Monday night, we used the stretchies again, and he did go to sleep on his bed, with no attempts, as far as we could tell, at trying to get out. Last night, he did try three or four times, but then silence. When I went in 45 minutes later, I couldn't find him anywhere - not in the cot, not in the bed..... eventually I found him fast asleep UNDER the bed! I left him for a bit, until I was sure he was sound asleep and then put him into the bed.

So, the stretchies technique (a variation of the "Toddler Taming" rope trick) seems to be working - some may not approve, but he doesn't seem to be distressed by it (and beleive me, he would let us know if he was!).

My problem is ths: yesterday he came running through to our bed at 6.15 am, full of life and expecting us to entertain him. This morning (so dh tells me), it was 4.54 (I was trying not to open my eyes!). Normally we get him up at 7 - although we knew he was often awake earlier - but was always happy to play with the (many!) toys in his cot. His is definitely his father's son (dh is a morning person - I am NOT!)

How do we discourage him from coming though this early? We do try to tell him it is still "sleepy" time, but it only works for a few minutes while he "pretends" to sleep. Do we put the stretchies back on to the door handle (we'd been taking them off once he was asleep), so that he can't get out? Do we take him back through to his room when he comes through before a certain time? A stair gate on the door is no good, as he's be able to climb over it.

Or do I just have to start going to bed earlier to cope?!

My best friend last night on the phone "sympathised" by saying "welcome to the real world - you've had it easy for the past 2 1/2 years!".

JanZ, I've no advice based on experience I'm afraid, but just wanted to say that you ds sounds very sweet, and also I can sooo imagine my ds being just like that when we move him to a bed - the exact reason I'm really dreading it (he too is a lark, but at the moment happy to play in his cot until the acceptable hour of around 6.45-7).

Only a couple of things to say - my mum says my brother always used to fall asleep on the floor of his room (often behind the door which I guess he couldn't open!), so you may need to continue putting him back in his bed for some time! Also I think all your ideas sound worth a try - if he can't get out of the room he may be happy to play for a while in the morning as he did in the cot. Good luck, I sympathise. 7 am starts I can cope with, 6 am I cannot!

Can anyone explain why my ds always wakes up half or a full hour earlier at weekends than he does monday to Friday??

Will dh and I ever get our morning cuddles(and ..... ) back???

lol

I would be interested if you keep us posted JanZ because we're thinking about moving in this direction with DS. We're on holiday for 5 days soon and intending putting him a bed because his travel cot is too small. If that goes OK we will then put him into a bed at home. He currently has a sleeping bag and I was thinking of continuing with this.

Rkayne,

Haven't read all the replies so sorry if I am repeating someone else. We put a stairgate across the bedroom doorframe so that, although they could climb out of bed they couldn't get out of the room. My kids usually played with toys for while before demanding attention.

Sorry Janz - didn't see this was your problem. Sorry the gate didn't work. Is he standing on something to climb over it? Mine couldn't do that. You might have to just keep putting him back till he learns.

We've never actually used a stair gate with ds (just "taught" him stairs early on), but given that he can climb out (and into!) his cot, I don't see the point in getting one for his door entrance, as he'd just climb over it. He's intelligent enough to work out how to get some height if it's too tall as well! (That was how he got out of his travel cot the first time - pulled in some jumpers that were within reach on the arm of a sofa to create a ramp!).

At the weekend I popped out to speak to the bloke that was chopping down some trees for us, and when I came back in, I found his wee red Ikea chair beside the front door. I can only assume he had dragged it downstairs to try to get to the door catch! (fortunately it's a Yale, so he would have had to turn AND pull, so that was beyond him!)

JanZ - my kids could climb in and out of the cot but not over the stairgate. We didn't have stairs - got it purely as a barrier to toddlers getting out the bedroom. Meant they could also see out instead of having a closed door. Also meant we could see in.

Bozza - I'd also thought of keeping ds in the sleeping bag, but he seems to be OK with the duvet (when we finally get him to settle) - and anyway, he's learnt how to walk in the sleeping bag.

Mears - I can see the value of being able to see in (although we've always shut the door to his room, so I think the extra stimulus of seeing the landing would not help getting him to settle at night). However, I still think he'll work out a way to get over the barrier - he's a strong lad and already pulls/pushes dining chairs to wherever he wants to get up to! Little tyke!

Has anyone tried the "alarm clock" rabbbit, which has a "sleeping" rabbit which "wakens" at a certain time as an easier way of letting a child know when they ARE welcome?! (Rather than the impossible task of trying to teach the time at this young age).

Reading all these just makes me glad I've left ds1 (25months)in a cot despite the arrival of ds2 - we got a 2nd hand one for him - I'm in no rush to move him at all - agree with Bloss!

My main motivation for moving DS is that he is really too big for his travel cot. So I thought it might be easier for him to sleep in a bed all the time rather than just when we are away. Will wait and see how our five days in a caravan go before comitting...

I'd fully intended leaving ds in his cot until he was a teenager....!

However, now that he's learnt to climb out on his own, coupled with the fact that at night he is in a sleeping bag, so that he can't climb out "normally", which results in him waddling into our room, still in his sleeping bag, clutching his head going "hurt... hurt..." meant that the decision was made for me!

awww, bless...he just sounds the cutest!!
My ds is also in a sleeping bag and has just learnt how to 'walk' in it (dh says he looks like the baby from popeye with no legs...). I am hoping it will be a while before he learns how to climb out of the cot and will probably get a second cot for number two.
Do let us know how you get on!

Jan Z

We have the rabbit alarm clock and it did work to keep him in bed when ds was about 2.5/3. However things changed about a year later when he realised that he could "wake" bunny up earlier by pressing the button on the top (perhaps best put out of the reach of little fingers). He still likes it though (now 5) ,it has a clear face with numbers so he is learning the time and at least it looks cute! I think there is also a Winnie the Pooh version out now.

LIZS - any idea where I could get one?

We decided to leave it another night, before taking "special" measures - to be honest, dh wasn't keen on the idea of using the stretchie to keep him in - after all, 5 am isn't too early for him!

However - ds came through this morning at 4.22! (I did open my eyes this time as I was going to take him back through). We decided to let him stay with us and see if he would sleep, which worked for about 3/4 hour and then he started wanting entertained, going off and getting himself some raisins and wanting his cornflakes! Even dh had enough, so he put him back in his room and shut the door with the stretchies.

When he went to get him just before 7, ds was fast asleep on the floor on the other side of the door!

So, tonight, the stretchies will be kept on THROUGH the night!

BTW - ds apparently (I was out) only made one attempt to get out last night when dh put him down - and then went to sleep ON his bed. Progress there at least!

Hi Janz

Sounds as if you are making some progress. We bought our clock from the Blooming Marvellous catalogue but I think John Lewis may stock them.

One thought - did you give your ds new bedding when he moved ? Some kids like the familiarity of whatever they are used to (ours kept his cot quilt for a while) others may respond to using "grown up" bedlinen.

hth