Why won’t my baby nap in the morning?

[Robin25]

Hello! First time mum looking for some help/advice. My nearly four week old will not nap in the morning at all. He can be awake from 6am to sometimes as late as 1pm. Surely this isn’t normal?
We’re trying to follow a routine where he feeds every four hours, starting at 7am then next feed at 11am then 3pm etc, but between 7am and midday he is just awake constantly wanting more food, he will nap for about 20 mins max and will then be wide awake. He can easily put away 5/6ozs of milk in one sitting and keep it down. I don’t think he’s cluster feeding as he’s been like this for three weeks, only sleeping in the morning for the first few days.

We’ve tried, swaddles, white noise, pram rockers, contact napping, being outside in the pram, swing chairs, he just does not sleep… and I’m at my wits end!
I thought babies nap for hours at a time… why doesn’t my baby? Any advice/help would be greatly appreciated!

Oh it wouldn't let me post the pic il try again with a link

https://images.app.goo.gl/hdggr8kHNCEzk7cj6

Well exactly and bearing in mind the guidelines change so frequently and every baby is different.
I can't post that cues chart but it was a godsend for me with my first.
Just Google newborn baby cues. The ones where it includes the different cries are so helpful for example neyyyy is more hunger whereas heh is more discomfort. Was a light bulb moment for me once I worked it all out!

My baby needs feeding after 1.5 hours sometimes - they'd go crazy crying if they were left for 4 hours!!

All babies are different, so for a HV to say every 4 hours is fine sounds a bit strange to me. My HV said just feed when the show signs of needing more - sometimes it is after 4 hours and sometimes 1.5, or anywhere in between.

Cluster feeding continued for me until about 3 months of age.

It might be that your baby just doesn't need much sleep, but I'd definitely try feeding more if they will take it, just to rule it out.

If he is draining bottles, give him an extra ouce. Personally, I'd aim more for 3 hours during the day to encourage more feeding during the day in the hopes he will then go longer stretches at night.

Over tired babies are trickier to get to sleep. Have a look at wake windows and see if you can get him down before he is so over tired, once you can do that then they tend to sleep a bit better during the day.

Feeding every four hours is a very long stretch of time for a tiny baby with a tiny little tummy to go without eating or drinking anything, because for a baby milk is what they’re eating and what they are drinking. Adults would struggle to go four hours without anything passing our lips and most of us have some reserves that we could live off if required.
Please reconsider the four routine you have been using, even if your health visitor okayed it.

Please don't try and get him into a routine. He's your baby. Follow his cues. Feed him as often as he wants, cluster feeding can happen for months. My babies never napped much at all and certainly not to any kind of routine. He's too little, honestly

That is a very long time to go without a nap at that age... perhaps he is too hungry to sleep?

What is your motivation for scheduling your baby so hard? Just... try to relax a bit more with it?

They're a person in their own right, and their wants and needs are only going to grow further away from yours.

As a mum who struggled with feeding, I remember asking a NICU nurse "how will I know if my baby has eaten enough?" Her answer was "she'll sleep!" This is why everyone is responding by asking about feeding.

The 20min post-feed "milk coma" you mention is still a nap. If they've slept relatively well at night, they're not likely to need as much nap in the morning.

Also - they'll be doing something completely different in 2 weeks time!

He is sleeping - OP said he does 20mins sleeps throughout the morning - which I would class as napping, I'm not sure what she means tbh.

But then she also says he wants more food but she waits til 4h so god knows.

A routine can work very well with some babies, it did with mine and it wasn't too young at all.

@Robin25, just as an experiment, would you consider feeding your little one on demand for say four days, just to see how he responds to it?

Each to their own but the importance of following babies' cues is stressed a lot, not imposing routines on them

You can do both.

Not recommended at this age though, by a long stretch.

No need to be snotty to people who you've asked for advice, OP.

When my son was born, I was advised by three separate midwives that 2h, 3h and 4h intervals were correct. One midwife insisted on tucking his umbilical cord into his nappy. They're not experts on nutrition, they just know guidelines (and some of them are frankly thick as shit).

If he's finishing bottles, then you can look out for signs of hunger such as tongue thrusting, or clenched fists (a baby's hand will relax when they're full).

Says who? As long as you are following babies cues, there's absolutely nothing wrong with building a routine around it.

The issue is when those cues aren't followed.

…and going from the information in the OP, it seems like the baby’s cues aren’t being followed. Very sad for the baby.

OP isn’t coming back but I do hope she is able to reflect on the comments and perhaps work more with her baby’s needs.