At breaking point- split nights.

[55christmasmagic]

My 15 month old has split nights probably 4/5 times a week. It's more often than not I'm up for 4 hours in the middle of the night. I work evenings due to childcare and DP daytime and therefore dp needs sleep at night, and I can't have an early night as I'm at work. It's breaking us. We have became miserable people. I called a doctor crying begging for help and he told me 'babies don't sleep, did you not know that before having one?'

He dropped his second nap at 10 months. No chance of reintroducing it.

We have tried
Waking him at the same time every day
Moving bedtime back
Moving bedtime forward
Eating high protein dinner
Cutting nap at 1.5 hours

Moving nap later
Cutting out dairy
Cutting out rice.
Cutting out tv
Porridge at bedtime
Banana at bedtime
Change of bedtime routine

CIO has been contemplated but he once screamed and cried and was awake for 10 hours when I refused to feed to sleep.

Please be kind . We are at breaking point.

Thank you for all the responses.

I agree he's definitely over tired. We did try moving his nap back but I'm going to try again.

The issue is with his naps and wake up time is that he naturally wakes, so if he wakes up after 50 mins from his nap- he refuses to go back down again and the same at night.

He has a few food allergies so meal times can be tough too.

I have considered a sleep consultant but I've heard so many mixed reviews- I think I've tried so so much with such little success I don't know if it would be worth it. I hope this gets easier soon!

Re the waking up naturally. I found being super stubborn worked when I needed a specific routine. For example if DS woke before 6:30 then we just stayed in his room 'sleeping' while rocking in his chair till that time. He would fight for a few seconds but then would be happy to settle in my arms (sometimes to sleep, sometimes just chilling). Then I made a big deal about it being awake time after that. You could try the same with naps, keep him in the room in the dark till it was time to wake up?

@55christmasmagic I would suggest that it doesn't matter if he wakes naturally after a short amount of time, just take him out/up/about and then put him back down after the wake window of a 10 month old which is 2.5-3.5 hours. This may mean he's having 3 naps a day but does it matter if he sleeps better at night? X

We used a sleep consultant, from Good Night Baby Devon. It wasn't expensive- £80 I think and the best money I've ever spent. Ongoing support for free which was priceless.

I imagine she will tell you what she told me - one nap around 12:30-2ish, and drop the breastfeeding overnight. He's waking for comfort, which you can give in other ways, but he isn't hungry and doesn't need the breast milk.