Early waking habit 2.5year old how to break, and any recommendations of a sleep consultant for a toddler

[Flower0503]

Hi,
My 2.5year old is on the habit of waking around 5am for the last few months. We broke it for a week or so a couple of months ago with earlier bedtimes but now it is back. We tried without a nap (he only has about 30mims) but that led to earlier waking. He has a gro clock he ignores. He has a solid bedtime routine. He isn't waking hungry as can go for 1-2houra after waking before breakfast.

Any suggestions how to break the habit?
Any recommendations of a sleep consultant specifically with experience for toddlers please?
I need him to sleep later for my sanity!

I guess people do it differently, I never had any problems just moving routines. If you go out they nap in the buggy or car don't they?

In my NCT group was a mother who was always stressing about nap times, wake up times - all the stress was self-generated. It's a waste of energy. They grow up.

@carefulcalculator yes, that’s the problem.

Today DS woke at 6, has a swimming lesson at 9. All being well he will go swimming and be back for 1030, lunch at 1130, nap at 12.

Had he woken at 5 there is a very good chance he’d have fallen asleep on the way to swimming and then had a second wind meaning he wouldn’t be ready for another nap until 2, which is too late, so you have to somehow plough through until bedtime, which is early because child is exhausted meaning they wake early …

OP, I’ll add a better response than my previous one regarding ‘consequences’.
My youngest has always been a lark. I go to bed around 9:30-10 and I’m up at 6am every day. I didn’t do that when he was younger (he’s 8 now). I stayed up until midnight watching TV, insisting on ‘me time’. Me time after 10pm will wear you out. Make me time sleep time.
I focused on changing my DC’s pattern. In actuality, I needed to change my own. Sleeping earlier solved everything. And my little boy wasn’t always going to be up at 5am. Now it’s 6am… sometimes 6:30 (still, so early but better than 5!). With work and school looming on your horizon for many years, you’ll be so glad you have a lark, believe me. My other two were the opposite and it just makes the morning start a bit more uphill (they’re larks now but it took a few years). I’m not a morning person by nature, but my lark has actually made me a far more productive person (and coffee lover!). It’s a blessing in disguise. But you do have to go to bed earlier to make it work.

Honestly, this just doesn't seem a problem to me!

I personally think the people who are more flexible with sleep have fewer sleep stresses, it seems a bit self-fulfilling prophecy.

This debate will rage forever I assume.

I don’t think it needs to as it isn’t a debate. Getting up at 5 wasn’t a problem for you, which is fine. For me, it isn’t ideal, which is also fine.

While some people are probably naturally more laidback than others, I don’t think as a rule it’s the case that the world is divided into rigid, uptight people who create problems with their children’s sleep, and easygoing, carefree individuals who have children who sleep anywhere as a result.

The child maketh the parent. My ds has not slept in his pushchair for a loooong time. If he skips his nap, nothing terrible happens, but it isn’t ideal for him to be exhausted, is all. He is a much happier child when he’s had a decent sleep in the middle of the day.

It’s been a long time since I had a toddler that age but I do remember those early morning wakeups, and how hard it was.
I can’t remember the exact age these ideas were suitable - maybe a little older - so apologies in advance if it’s not yet relevant to you.

A few things that worked for me ..,
Putting a snack and a drink beside the bed after they had gone to sleep, for the next morning. I know you said they’re not hungry but maybe give it a try to see if it helps. Just a rusk or similar.

I had a child’s battery operated small CD player (tech has moved on obviously since then, but could be adapted), I recorded myself reading bedtime stories to them from picture books. No extra time needed for this, I just did it during usual evening routine of bedtime story.
In the morning, they could listen back to the story with the picture book and hear my voice and their comments. This worked a treat and they really enjoyed listening to the playbacks of my voice and theirs over and over. I built up a collection over several months.

I kept a collection of toys for under 3’s hidden away in a separate box from general toy box use. These only ever came out for early morning wake ups. One left at the bedside for them to explore the next morning and I rotated them every couple of days or so.

It didn’t solve the early waking but it kept dc entertained in the bedroom and gave a focus for an hour. That, along with lots of praise for keeping occupied until getup time.

All the posters criticising are completely missing the point. You are not punishing the fact the child is an early riser. You are treating their behaviour afterwards. You punish and praise how they behave. Do they stay in bed and read for example, obey the rules so get the choice of breakfast or a sticker. Or no tv. Or praise.

And yes, I'd go to bed earlier myself.

If you read my previous post, you'll see I commented on the fact that 4 is different to 2!

15 mins a day change gradually. Kids will adapt. Due to circumstances we travelled a lot long haul and they adapted to the hours difference easier than the adults, we were just strict on meal times so they knew when the "proper time" was

I should add, mine came into bed with us when they woke, dd1 this would be about 6am and she would sleep another 90 mins- hour, dd2 rarely made it past 2am in her bed

My son was like this and he's 3.5 now and sleeps until 730 or longer. It was nothing we did, I think nursery helps tire him out.

Lots of thoughts on here. I have a very early waker too. Is it OK to try to get them to entertain themselves for a bit longer in the morning, or is it mean leaving them alone? Ds is almost 4, he has potty, food and drinks he can access in his room, plus lights and TV. If I could just get to 6am that would be a lot more humane! Plus his baby sister likes to sleep until 7...

I don't think it's mean at all, as long as they're happy. DD1 is nearly 3.5 and has played by herself until her gro clock wakes up for at least 6 months now. If she's ever upset in the night or after she wakes then of course we go in, but generally we hear her chatting away as she "reads" her books, plays etc.

Wow lots of responses, thank you

He generally wakes at least once a night, sometimes i have to stay with him till he goes back to sleep again, sometimes he goes off himself. Before july time he slept until 6.30/7am. He is generally grumpy when he wakes now, or grumpy within a couple of hours (not resolved by food) so I genuinely think he hasn't had enough sleep.

We have tried him playing in his room, sometimes it works, sometimes he keeps coming to me or gets really frustrated and crying if he is particularly tired still. He goes off to sleep ok usually (although more difficult the more tired he is).

He made it until 6.10 yesterday and until 5.45 last week with me going in at 4am, putting his duvet back on and putting continuous white noise on (he has white noise to sleep at night and that reactivates for 20mims if he stirs in the night already, but thought continuous may block out any road noise that disturbs him initially). Didn't work today. His room is dark woth blackout blinds

He is waking his big sister who is really struggling so given the combination of both kids been tired would like to try anything else to see if he will sleep longer...