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Sleep

Join our Sleep forum for tips on creating a sleep routine for your baby or toddler. Need more advice on your childs development? Sign up to our Ages and Stages newsletter here.

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Original poster

please reply this time!!

50 replies

carmenelectra · 16/01/2008 07:21

I posted this message last wk and only 2 people replied! Im hoping for more responses this time as im more desperate!

16 wk baby, previously mixed fed, now just ff. Happy contented baby all day, no trouble at all. usually goes to bed at 730 ish and wakes once in night, feeds and then goes back off until 7am ish. Except for more than 2 wks now, hes not settling at night. Goes bed same time but wakes for his feed and goes back off but then keeps waking(at least every hour)grizzling/moaning. IM rocking the bloody crib all night, plus putting dummy back in. HE then wakes up all happy as usual and fine all day again.

I had a few theories;
1.teething-he dribbles lots, bites his hand, red cheeks. Tried teething gel/calpol/teething powder. Not upset in the day by this though, so not convinced.

2.colic - was having colief for /suspected colic but i did start to reduce it. Ive 'upped' it again now though and has been having it regularly since last Mon, so again, not convinced its colic.

3.Does he just w ants his dummy more? Im thinking maybe getting more attached to it?And then becomes a nightmare in the night, keep putting it in. Hes not normally that bothered by dummy.

Anyway, today im pissed off. He woke at 2am to feed and only had 4oz so dont even think he was hungry. Then woke constantly till 6am when he was happy and cooing and wanting to get up. I didnt feel like smiling at all. Plus the dog woke me at 5am to go out(only happens on nights im knackered).

Tonight, im either tempted to put him in own room or ask DP to go in another room and i will ignore baby as much as i can to see if he will settle. Whats bloody wrong with him?

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

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PerkinWarbeck · 16/01/2008 07:33

ok - here's a reply!

what's wrong with him?

nothing. It's just what some babies are like. I know it seems unfair because others aren't, but there you go.

My daughter was very similar. we spent months rocking her, whilst eating one-handed, running in to replace the dummy, reswaddled, soothe etc all evening and several times overnight.

it was horrid. you have my heartfelt sympathy.

We sleep trained at an age we felt our daughter was ready for it - 6.5mo in our case, though many will say that's too early. I honestly don't think it would have worked for out DD any earlier - I'm not sure it would work for a baby as tiny as yours.

My DD also had a dummy. Again, at this age I found it very helpful. After 5mo it was more trouble than it was worth, and we plucked up the courage to ditch it when we did the sleep training. TBH I would recommend getting rid of the dummy for an older baby if you find it disturbs, rather than helps their sleep. But loads of people find it a great help.

This is such a difficult age, but things will get better, even if you do nothing.

In the meantime, why not pop into this thread for support. There's a lovely bunch of mums there who support each other through sleep deprivation, and who have bags more ideas on gently encouraging your baby to sleep more.

Original poster

carmenelectra · 16/01/2008 07:36

Well i do think theres something wrong cos he has only just started doing it! There must be something waking him and unsettling him if he previously was contented. Thats what i think.

Its not that im particaularly tired to be honest(obviously it was much harder when first born)more that i dnt know how to settle him or whats causing this.

OP posts:

booge · 16/01/2008 07:42

If he's not that fussed about a dummy why don't you just ditch now and then he won't become attached. Sorry I can't help much, if mine were unsettled I just had them in bed with me and they then slept like little logs.

PerkinWarbeck · 16/01/2008 07:43

Growth spurt. The little monkeys have them from time to time and it throws everyting out of kilter.

Here.

4 months is a really common time for a growth spurt. Plus if your DS is getting ready to roll, sit up, or achieve any of the other milestones, then his synapses will be fizzing far too much for him to sleep.

Hang on in there. It might well get better all by itself after a week.

Original poster

carmenelectra · 16/01/2008 07:43

He does sleep like a log with me, that why im suspicious there is anything wrong with him!

OP posts:

Karen999 · 16/01/2008 07:49

Could you take his dummy out as he is falling asleep so that he is not going to get used to it in the night?

What are his feeds like/sleeps like during the day?

Maveta · 16/01/2008 07:50

oh I wish I had some advice for you. My ds sleep like yours, waking once a night, until he was 4/5 months. He´s now 8.5 months old and has slept like you describe ever since. We are desperate, we have no solution but to accept it.

We moved him into his own room, it made no difference
We started giving him cereal before bed which worked for 3 wonderful, blissful, nights and hen stopped working
I can´t even remember other things we´ve tried. I think teething has a lot to do with it, and he´s just a miserable baby at night. Although during the day he´s an absolute sweetheart, ray of sunshine, etc etc etc.

Lately my ds doesn´t even sleep well in our bed, seems like he just doesn´t want to sleep!

It´s miserable, sorry I can´t be of more help and am in fact just the voice of doom but there you go..

Original poster

carmenelectra · 16/01/2008 08:16

Hes a little darling in the day! Feeds 3hrly in the day, naps after feeds for 30-40 min when in the house, or long time in the pram, but never when we are at home. Settled all day in between feeds.

I had thought about the growth spurt! Dont remember ahving it with my first ds.

He usualy drops his dummy when asleep in the day or sometimes in his pram he goes off without it. I feel mean taking it off him but i also dont want things to be like they were with ds1. Dropped his dummy every 5 min!

Gotta leave for school, be back in bit, anymore advice gratefully received.

OP posts:

Original poster

carmenelectra · 16/01/2008 09:28

Has anyone else got any advice, or is it a case of presuming its a growth spurt and things will get better soon?

OP posts:

Karen999 · 16/01/2008 09:32

Hi, sorry you may have mentioned this, but is he swaddled at all? I still tuck my dd in with a blanket which seems to help? Could he be waking up because he is wriggling?

StealthPolarBear · 16/01/2008 09:35

Maveta, I assumed this would be you bumping anyway

MegBusset · 16/01/2008 09:35

Oh god, great sympathy, 4/5 months was an awful time for DS's sleep. We found co-sleeping saved our sanity (too young for sleep training imo). If he sleeps like a log in with you then that would seem the perfect answer to your sleep woes!

Original poster

carmenelectra · 16/01/2008 09:47

Thanks girls!
Dont swaddle no, i did when he was very little, but now he is in a sleeping bag. Hes very big- 18lbs and i need to get next size bag. Although still fits, thers not much room. He sleeps in a swinging crib and he does kick his legs right up and back down and we can hear the thud downstairs! Dont know if that wakes him though.

I dont really want to put him in with us all the time to be honest. Again, i did it when he was first born and when bf, but he has been sleeping so well, that i would feel im going backwards. Also, im back at work March and was gonna probably put him in his cot just before. Oh i dont know now!

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BabiesEverywhere · 16/01/2008 09:59

QUOTE He does sleep like a log with me
I know you don't want to co-sleep but thats the answer if you want sleep straight away. Just cuddle up and get some sleep.

However maybe you can sleep with him during the day for naptimes so you can both get more rest during the day, even if he needs to be in his own cot at night ?

Original poster

carmenelectra · 16/01/2008 10:03

Babies,

I do put him in with me eventually when he doesnt settle. I put him in about half 5 this am.

He only sleeps for half hour intervals in the day and to be honest, im not really that tired once im up.Its just the nighttime i could cry!

Im very active in the day usually so forget im tired!

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IwansMam · 16/01/2008 10:08

I'd try the cot as you're thinking about already? Maybe the swing of the crib is no longer helping but hindering his sleep. Our swing used to get DS (now 6.5 months) off for his naps but now seems to keep him awake and has done for a few months.

Original poster

carmenelectra · 16/01/2008 10:14

Maybe the crib is annoying him.In between rocking, if he is settled, i usually lock it but if i forget he rolls right up to the bars cos he is so big. There does seem to be plenty of room tho still. I think i moved ds1 out of it at 5 mths and he wasnt so big.

If i do move him into cot though i would have to put him in his own room. I really dont know whether thats a good idea or not?

OP posts:

Karen999 · 16/01/2008 10:17

I moved dd into her own room at 12 weeks - up until then she had been in the same room with me. I think there are guidelines which say it is best to keep them in with you till 6 months, am not sure. Maybe someone could clarify that.

Original poster

carmenelectra · 16/01/2008 10:22

Yes it is 6 mths definitely but its stil my choice of course. I would obviously use monitors.

OP posts:

seeker · 16/01/2008 10:23

I know I'm repeating everyone else, but if he sleeps well with you, why not just take him in with you? I'm all for whatever solution gives the maximum sleep for the maximum number of people!

Original poster

carmenelectra · 16/01/2008 10:28

I know seeker, but what about when i go back tO Work. I dont want to struggle to get him out of it. I will be working one night a week also as part of my shift pattern, so DP would then have to have him in bed with him. Hes a heavy sleeper, though im sure he would wake for the baby.

I dont have a problem with babies in bed as a temporary solution but i dont want it to be a regular thing. Im worried he may get used to it.

OP posts:

Nip · 16/01/2008 10:31

Not sure if this will help, but when my DS was about the same age he had a dummy and was sleeping terribly. He didnt care if it fell out or not. However my HV said that having the dummy associates with having milk, and so he was confused, she suggested getting rid of the dummy and we may have a few crap nights but then it would be better.
We ditched the dummy and he slept thru for the first time. (I'm not sure if the association thing was true, but it made sense to me and more importantly it worked!)

Original poster

carmenelectra · 16/01/2008 10:36

i have thought about ditching dummy. Should i just take it away altogether? is it cruel??!

OP posts:

Nip · 16/01/2008 10:43

i literally got home from the HV and chucked them in the bin. End of.
HV told me that i should sit and discuss it with DH etc, and i realise some people have issues, but perhaps i'm cruel.
He didnt do anything, ok it took a little to get him off to sleep but that soon wittled (sp?)down again.

Nip · 16/01/2008 10:44

sorry that should have read:

ok it took a little longer to get him off to sleep but that soon wittled (sp?)down again.

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