Help! Keeping newborn warm at night without overheating - cold feet/hands/face?

[Aberforthsgoat]

Hello!
I have a newborn DS a week and a bit old. He was born at 37 weeks and is a under six pounds.

I have a room thermometer one of those egg things that says my room is a toasty 20 on average overnight although it can drop down to 18-19, which I know is still optimum window for babies.

However, to me it feels draughty and a bit chill sometimes. A few times at night, I've picked up DS and he feels cold when I put him against me. He was a c section baby and when he was born his hands were bluish purple tinted which was apparently normal, they pinked up a bit yesterday but then today when I picked him up from a nap his little hands were like blocks of ice and back to how they had been. His face was cold too.

I'm really bad at judging temp with my hands - I know it sounds silly but I can't really feel how warm his skin feels when I check, I can just tell that he doesn't feel hot or ice cold but struggle to tell if he feels too cool or just pleasantly warm.

I put him down in a short sleeved vest and a baby grow (both cotton) with feet. Then I cover him with hand knitted blanket that's doubled up and tucked into his moses basket - he tends to wriggle up a bit so it ends up not covering his chest completely sometimes as he sleeps - and then if the temp drops I add another blanket.

I have a grobag 2.5 tog but I think he's too small for it at the moment :( i've tried it on him and I'm not 100% convinced it won't go over his little head so don't want to risk it yet.

His head always feels cool but I know that's a good thing to stop him overheating. I'm just at my wit's end and starting to dread nighttime because I'm panicking that I've not kept him warm enough and I'm going to make him ill or there's something wrong with his circulation.

I guess I'm asking, is it normal for babies to have cold hands/feet/face? When the room is 20 ish? Are gro-eggs reliable? It seems to be.

I did have a thermometer but it ended up being inaccurate and telling me his temperature was REALLY low - like hyperthermia low - and did the same for DH who was clearly not that cold - so the midwife told me to ditch the thermometer and just use my hands.

Which I'm terrible at.

Sorry for the long rant, I'm sleep deprived and anxious and on the brink of ringing up the midwife ward for advice on how to keep him warm which is making me feel like a crushing failure of a mum and it's barely even been a week.

DS1 was well under 6lb here and a few days old. You can see it fits tightly around the neck.

I have a grosnug cozy and light. I started using it when she was 5lb5 and she filled it enough. It's not tight around her neck (she's now 7lbs) but she is a little dot!

She wears the cozy at night with a short sleeve vest and a long sleeve vest. My room is 19 degrees on average according to the gro egg

Ignore the hands and feet, they aren't a reliable indicator of temperature. 😁

If u use the light gro snug with the room around 19 degrees they say to use a sleepsuits with legs I think. There are pictures on the packaging to guide you what to wear at what temperature

Cold extremities are normal. Please stop worrying! You can always pop a little hat on if you are worried (big head in comparison to adults with little hair). If he is sleeping well and feeding well you are doing just fine.

Cold hands is normal, nothing like a winter baby for putting icy hands in your cleavage during night feeds...

Plenty of gro products or you can just use sleepsuits with built in mittens and a cardigan over the top if chilly. Or cellular blanket. 18-19 is fine, we have an ancient draughty house and temperature in our bedroom goes a lot lower.

And dont use a hat, that's bad advice

www.jojomamanbebe.co.uk/elephant-print-newborn-sleepy-sac-b1500.html We had one of these when our baby was newborn I liked the sleeves as knew he wouldn’t wriggle down into it x

I found that my children slept best wearing velvet sleepsuits like these:
www.laredoute.co.uk/ppdp/prod-350146051.aspx?dim1=2

I discovered this by accident when I put my first baby in a cute velvet suit that my relative bought her - she woke up fewer times and we realised it was because she was waking up with the cold. I do tend to have my house a bit cooler at night that it says on the gro-egg charts as it was too hot for me. As long as they are tucked up well and not in a draught, they will be fine.

I had a June baby and our room was 26° even with air con on! Her little hands were still cold during the night but she was often in just a vest and light blanket and sometimes just a nappy and blanket and I was terrified of her overheating or getting too cold but when I checked her tummy or back it felt okay.

I was very anxious about this too in a very old and draughty house, but a colleague said to me 'cold babies cry, hot babies die' which is obviously tongue in cheek but correct in essence. Far safer to be too cold than wrapped up too hot.
My dd always has icy cold hands and never seems to mind! She has only been in her gro bag a week as I waited until she was the correct weight for it. But when she was smaller we had her in a vest, baby grow and a doubled over cellular blanket. If her hands are cold you could buy those baby grows with the scratch mitt things attached and fold them over so your dc is nice and snug.
Finally, I think being anxious as you are about the sleep is utterly and totally normal, our little ones are so precious.

You are so normal to be worrying about this, I think we’ve all been there as a first time mum and just unsure what temp is ok. Everything you’re doing sounds fine, agree a sleeping bag that fits may reassure you a bit. Only thing I’d add is that in winter I would always use long sleeve vest, not short. That’s perhaps not the guidelines but it’s not going to cause them to overheat and I don’t want them to feel cold. Over time you’ll get a feel for temps, by comparison. Ie at their first jags at 8wks, they are likely to get a temperature, and you learn what a top hot baby feels like then. But relax, you can’t know everything until you go through it and sounds like you are getting it right.

It does get easier when they fit in the sleeping bags, won't be long I'm sure. To check temperature, slide your hand down the neck of the sleep suit and feel how warm baby's back is. Don't worry about being worried 😊. Being anxious is normal as a new mum. I once cried because I thought DS1 had a scratch, turned out the "dried blood" was chocolate I'd dropped on him when scoffing whilst breastfeeding 🤦🏻

We are using gro snugs with DS who was born at 33 weeks and came home 3 weeks later, weighing under 6 lb. Home seemed very cold after NICU which was about 25 degrees and they bundled him up there under 3 layers of blankets on top of sleepsuit and vest. We use an extra blanket with the light gro snug, or no blanket with the cosy one. Room varies between 18 and 20. In NICU they were very concerned about premature and low birth weight babies getting cold so I've found the gro snugs very reassuring and well worth it.

This is my baby at 6 weeks in the grosnug, you can see the poppers under the armpits which keep it snug

Thank you all, I’m really touched by how many replies I’ve got.
He’s been cluster feeding since 10pm - literally haven’t been able to put him down. I’ve just put him in the Moses basket in long sleeved vest, baby grow with feet and integrated scratch mittens, a doubled over knitted blanket and a another single blanket on top.
I’m in the living room due to the cluster feeding as it’s more comfortable and it’s around 20 degrees with a chill in the air - so far he’s been down for ten minutes which is a record tonight.
But I can tell that I am going to be up all night now checking he’s not overheating!
I wish I could be better at judging his temp just from touching him

You've got some great advice here but just to echo what a lot of previous posters have said, midwives and health visitor all said if in doubt go on the side of too cold as the baby will let you know

I use this as well and have the same thermometer as you:

www.babycentre.co.uk/a25024140/what-should-my-baby-wear-at-night-infographic

Thank you. He stayed down for a couple
Of hours so I think he must have been warm enough. He was just stirring and whining but the blankets had dropped down so I’ve tucked him back up and he has gone back to sleep...