Any suggested routine for 7 wk old?

[bramblina]

Should i just let him find his own or watch how much sleep he's getting? No idea how much at this age? Any suggested routines out there? First time mum. Loving it

hmmm not sure

the problem we had was that our baby was getting her long sleep between about 8pm-3am. so she could sleep for 7 or 8 hours at a stretch, but I wanted that stretch to be after midnight, not before. we only cracked it with dreamfeeding

hmmm so if that's always another option if the nights aren't working out. Last night he slept 8pm till 5am so I was very happy at that. He's just gone down now (9pm) after a very niggly day (only had 2x three quarter hr naps today) so we'll see how tonight works out...

sounds like progress.... then again it will all be different tomorrow...frustrating, eh?

(just realised I'm going to be mistaken for Lavenderrrr with all these .... in my posts )

I'll bet you notice a pattern, just more of the good nights like the one you describe, and fewer bad nights. Does he go back to sleep after the 5am feed? I used to get up at that time with our baby, didn't go back to bed. Then the paperboy saw me, total state, not even so much as a dab of Touche Eclat to cover up the damage motherhood has inflicted....realised I needed to get back to bed!

At least the winter is coming, it will be darker, might help your baby settle into a good pattern. We have a nightlight in her bedroom, I'm going to start switching it off after the 11pm feed, cos although she's sleeping through, she wakes up at 5.30 and has a natter that's so impassioned you'd think it was a G8 meeting. I'm hoping she'll learn that total darkness means, well "shut up!"

hi there - you're both doing really well sleepwise! I've got ds2 of same age - not doing badly but longest stretch he'll do is about 7.30-4ish with bottle of ebm at 1ish. How do you get them to sleep so long - are they breastfed or do you use a bottle for last feed, also are they sleeping in their own room yet??
(desperate to be let in on any secrets here!)

late bottle at 11pm (not 1) btw

I had DD in a routine (she was SO much happier) from about 7/8 weeks. Certainly she was going to bed around 7-7:30pm from 6 weeks. She would cluster feed for a couple of hours beforehand, which was nice because I used to put my feet up & watch TV whilst DH made tea) She would wake in the night, feed, then go straight back to sleep.

During the day I would put her for a nap 2 hours after she was awake - she had a dummy for this & would settle quite nicely (we had a bit of a battle to begin with, but got over this in a couple of days).

I think the reason the routine worked so well was DD although great at night-time sleeping, she really struggled during the day, so became over tired. Once we had established daytime naps, we were fine.

could also check out Gina Ford's & Tracy Hoggs books as they have rountines/guidance which is helpful.

At the end of the day, I think babies will find their own rountine. If it happens to suit you, that's great, but if it doesn't (ie sleeping all day, awake all night etc etc) then can be handy to have something to refer to.

could also check out Gina Ford's & Tracy Hoggs books as they have rountines/guidance which is helpful.

At the end of the day, I think babies will find their own rountine. If it happens to suit you, that's great, but if it doesn't (ie sleeping all day, awake all night etc etc) then can be handy to have something to refer to.

Even if you are demand feeding the baby may have already developed his own routine, you only need to slowly and carefully adapt it to fit the needs of the family as a whole. It is not difficult, it just takes a bit of patience and lots of consistence.

DS was well established in one at that age, obvioulsy the routine included also night feeds, early wakings etc, but at least helped me to know when he was going to be sleeping so I could take a shower or have a short grown up talk with friends or family before he was was again on the go

What did i do so wrong? After 8-9 weeks of a good routine, ds has decided he'd like a bit of a change now. Is refusing randoms bottles (sometimes night time, some times morning, sometimes afternoon), and is crying for no particular reason. Its a really painful cry though. It sounds like someone has just come and smacked him but of course no one has! It just comes out of no where, and the past couple of days have been an absolute nightmare. Still sleeping at night, but every other part of his routine has gone down the pan. I'm just waiting for that one to go. Just to top it off.

Bramblina - Hope things are going well. And if not, you can join me in feeling

MissChief, in response to your questions, our baby has slept in her own room from the beginning and has also always been formula fed.

She sleeps badly during the day, which is why I think she sleeps ok-ish at night

sorry, should have said, I've switched back to my original name of Mogwai - I was using swizzles in deference to the passing of the Stephone threads.

As a respectable time has now elapsed, I'm out of mourning clothes so bak to Mogwai

I started a sleep routine with ds around 6 weeks old.

5pm - Nappy free time on bedroom floor!
6pm - Bath with lots of lavender! (johnsons)
6.30 ish - 9oz bottle formula
7pm ish - Bed

At first he would wake at around 2am and then at 4.30am, after about a week he dropped the 2am, which was great, and the 4.30am feed slowly moved to 6am. He wouldnt always go straight to sleep either, and would cry for a few minutes, but I let him cry.
He is now 9 months and still has a similar routine, and has learnt to go to sleep by himself. I dont think you can start any routine 'too early'.

Also agree with mogwai about having their own room - my ds has been in his own room since he was 4 weeks.
Think it helps everyone to sleep better, as you dont hear every movement!

i cant put my daughter in her own room because i simply dont have that option , but sleeping in our room also has it's benefits she is 4 months and still keeps changing her routine

1. swapping from breastfeeding at 10 weeks
2. having imnuisations
3. teething and then if she feels like beeing a little monster . so to be honest i really think routines just go out the window untill they are about 6 months

swizzles- yes he goes back to sleep no probs after night feeds. When he was newborn we had him in a moses basket and for the daytime naps he was always in the livingroom, amidst the noise and bright daylight, then on an evening he'd have his bath and feed and we'd put the basket in our room, and shut the door so he would know the difference between night and day. He moved in to his cot at 6 wks so now has to have his naps in our bedroom but we leave the curtains and door open so the light and noise are still there. I'm so glad we did that as now he would practically sleep on a razor blade. We always try to put him to bed sleepy but awake and it has been worth it as he has no problems falling asleep on his own. He has (so far) always gone back to sleep when I put him back down after a night feed. If he wakes at 8am or after I would feed him then get up for the day, anytime before that and I would treat it as a night feed and put him back to bed. It has worked out like that so far and suits us fine.
MissChief- ds is breastfed. We don't give him bottles and I haven't needed to express to top him up. He doesn't really sleep much most days- today he only had an hour and a half so I think he's just so knackered by bedtime he's zonked. Although on Monday he got up at 9am, napped 11-12 and 2-4.30, went to bed at 8pm and slept till 5am. He does seem to feed a lot through the day, sometimes every 3 hours which is a little more often than ideal (some days I feel my boobs are out constantly!) but it seems to me like he's almost "storing" it all up for the night time, and as it's working so well I don't really mind. Sound like Mojomummy's routine. I'd rather feed all day than have bad nights. He's in our room but we never whisper around him, as I said he'll sleep through anything. The worst night we had he was up at 2am 4am 6am and 8am but he took a feed each time so I just thought it was a growth spurt. Other than that we've been really lucky. Do you feed on demand during the day? Could you get more in to him in the evening?
I have no need to force him in to a routine as strict as Gina Ford etc but I borrowed her book from a friend- it was handy just to get some guidelines like mojomummy says. She has a small chart which shows how much sleep babies are expected to have, from birth to 1yr which I used as a guideline and it really helped. I strongly disagree with GF about strict times etc as I couldn't live my life like that so didn't read the whole book.
Newmumhelp- do you think it could be colic? Or even early teething? You poor thing. Just as it's going well we get all cocky and then they screw it all up, don't they?! But when you're over this I'll prob be about something else!
Swizzles/Mogwai am confused about name- eh?
We haven't considered putting ds in his own room yet, what reasons did all of you do it so early? Think I'm just being lazy as I like to feed lying down!
Hope I haven't bored you all too much...do you feel you could talk about them forever? Or am I the only one obsessed? I only joined mumsnet to start this thread and can't believe how much interest others have shown I'm very grateful. But then I just want to do everything as best as I can...we had 4 miscarriages before DS came along so he's a very longed for little boy.

Well he had his injections on Friday so i think that might of messed him up. The first lot, absolutely no problem, this lot...OMG!!!!

I think order has been restored though. He was an absolute ray of sunshine today and he was a pleasure to have today. He had all his bottles (even though he left half of the last one), and he has gone to bed without so much as a whimper. I hope he's back to his normal cheerful, hungry self now. The world feels a great place today.

Tomorrow may be another story

We put ds in his own room at about 6 weeks, as he has a habit of waking up at 3-4am and talking to himself quite happily for an hour or so (sometimes up to 3 hours), and then goes back to sleep. Unfortunately, it woke me up, and i couldn't sleep until he went back to sleep. Although dp could sleep regardless i was knackered.

Plus he is very long and was too big for his moses basket by about 9 weeks so we would of had to of moved him then anyway, as we don't have room for the cot in our room.

Very pleased you got your little one after all that heartache

I have 4 boys who have all had a routine but what works for one baby doesn't always work for another!!

The daylight/dark thing works as babies pick up the difference very quickly and lets face it, even as an adult it is easier to sleep in the dark!!!!

DS1 (now almost 6) was bottlefed and had a routine of bed at 7pm but always woke around 3am until he was 4!!!

DS2 (4 next week) was breastfed and had a routine of bed at 6pm (so I had time to sort out DS1 for 7pm) and he slept through at 12 weeks!!!

DS3 (15 months) was bottlefed and had a routine of bed at 5pm (getting a pattern now - time to sort out DS2 bed at 6pm and DS bed at 7pm) and he slept through at 8 weeks!!!!

DS4 (8 weeks) is bottlefed and has a routine of bed at 7.30pm (ish) as I have to feed him after putting all the others to bed - the unfortunate thing about being the 4th baby with 3 others so young!!!! He doesn't sleep through YET but after a bottle at 10.30pm he goes until about 3.30am and then wakes with the others at around 7am (not bad considering all the noise in my house in the morning)!!!!

He is the only one to be in my room this long. DS1,2&3 all slept MUCH BETTER in their own rooms and so did I!!!!

I don't know about any of you but I believe routine is absolutely essential especially if you have more than 1 but is hard to implement with the first as you don't have to leave them crying while you sort out any others!!

The more I have the more the youngest has to cry while I deal with the demanding older ones. DS1 was very demanding (because he had me on a bit of string)! DS2 learned to wait for a bit, DS3 learned to wait longer and is very chilled out and DS4 has already learned at 8 weeks that he is last in the pecking order of demanding attention and has to wait forever BUT is sooo good and laid back he is nearly always asleep!! He learned very early on that throwing a wobbly gets them nowhere - if the others need feeding or the toilet (for example) the baby just has to wait and believe it or not they get used to it!!!

ROUTINE, ROUTINE, ROUTINE ITS THE ONLY THING THAT GETS ME THROUGH THE DAY AND KEEPS ME SANE (WELL AS SANE AS YOU CAN BE WITH 4 BOYS UNDER 6YRS)!!!!!

would have gone loony bonkers without routine

Also, on the subject of crying, I hated my baby crying for any length of time when she was very tiny, but looking back, very often, nothing I did helped her, she just kept crying.

My life improved considerably when I let her cry a bit more . Sometimes she just goes back to sleep (when napping). I'd say, for the last two months, I've never "rescued" her from the cot when she was crying, and she has always fallen asleep within fifteen minutes. She no longer escalates to being "frantic", just on-off whinging

My HV gave me an article published in australia saying that research shows, children who have been allowed to cry themselves to sleep (within reason) develop better sleep habits in the long term. I always felt this would make sense, intuitively, but there was the research to back up what I felt.

Some people have said I've been hard on my daughter, never having her sleep in our room, allowing her to cry a bit, formula feeding her, establishing a routine early. I can honestly say she is a very contented baby (everyone comments on it), always happy to amuse herself for periods of time, loves social interaction, doesn't cry much. She's usually a delight to have.

I've been slated on MN (even before she was born) for my decision for her to sleep in her own room, told I was "cruel", told I would probably change my mind etc. I don't regret any of my decisions though, it seems to be working out ok for all of us, though I know that a second baby might be totally different!

Good for you Mogwai!!!

I was/am always being told how "cruel" I am for leaving mine to cry or settle themselves to sleep but like you everyone always says how happy and content my boys are and I get asked "how do you do it" all the time!!! Funny thing is, you tell them and get a reply of "oh I couldn't do that or oh thats too harsh"...... and that is exactly why "they" are having problems and you/we aren't!!!!

Leave 'em in their own room, leave 'em to cry a bit, formula feed if YOU want to and they will still turn out happy babies and content wel rounded children.

We are too quick nowadays to pander to a baby's every whim and look at some of the wimpy children around today because of it!!!!!

dazed and confused

I agree TOTALLY - the number of threads I read, thinking "FFS stop bloody pandering!". Suspect I would be accused of being a total cow - I can't bear to post a reply cos I know I'll get slated! Feel sorry for new mums who take it all to heart.

Seriously, yes, people also ask me "how do you do it?" and I think it's just by having a sense of perspective and staying calm? I dunno, it's my first baby, what do I know? I just know what works for us, and it's about keeping some balance

Mogwai, well done you! I agree with everything you are saying on sleep/crying/routine. With help from my mum (she insists on strict bedtimes, routines and cc) me and Dh have the confidence to put ds down to sleep awake, and he has slept through from 6 weeks.
I dont think it is 'cruel' either. It is teaching.

I believe to trust your insticts- nobody knows better but Mum. We may be first time mothers (everyone is at some point and there are a lot of wonderful children as a result) but we do know best when it comes to our own children. Our HV told my friend that when her 6 wk old daughter was crying "she just wants a cuddle"! Yes of course she did but you can't give them cuddles 24/7- our HV has no children and therefore has no idea what sleepless nights are like. Thankfully neither do I (yet) so for the moment I must be doing something right.
I don't think you two are hard at all for the reasons you said- if you start to give in to a little whimper you are only creating a rod for your own back. I admire your courage, and sense for looking to the future and taking an interest in how your children will develop from what you are teaching them -too few people bother nowadays.

I'm just wondering about the own room thing as it's something we have no thoughts on. I suppose for ease, it would work when he's sleeping through...?
Don't you think these people who say "that's too harsh" etc like you're saying- are next year's families on Little Angels, Tiny Tearaways, Supernanny......then in 15 years time they'll be on Trisha? I can definitely see a pattern...

I'm just a ridiculously light sleeper, Bramblina. I did worry about her being in her own room at first, I'll admit. But it just works out fine for us. Well, except now she's discovered the pretty picture on her wall so sits talking to that at 6am!!

Try more pretty pictures you might get 7am out of it! I see what you mean. I worry too much about SIDS, the guidelines are so harsh and when it's your first you do trust the "experts", don't you? As I said last night Mum knows best. I should have a bit more confidence. Still can't help but worry though as you say.