Prestigious schools are upping the ante at their school fairs. A tin of value baked beans and a panda pop just won't cut it on the tombola anymore. And forget the cake stall's crispy crackles and squashed cupcakes These days it's all sugar craft and bespoke baking.
"We won't sell any chutney less than £7 on the produce stand," Camilla Made- Up- Name of Pretend PTA declares. "Nothing cocks a snook at the credit crunch more than my hand-churned lemon curd at 12 pounds a pop. "
"We consider it a failure if we don't net at least twenty thousand pounds for school funds,' adds Fiona I-Never-Really-Said-That-Obviously.
The contributers of godsend-to-a-lazy-journalist internet forum Mumsnet may disagree.
"Prizes are plastic tat, much loved by the children.
There is a second hand toy stall where you donate back the stuff your children bought the year before." -SoupDragon
"No, not the experience of a school in the Midlands, we charge 50p entrance fee. Who in th ename of god, goes to a school fair in anticipation of spending £7 on feckin chutney?!! madness." - HuwEdwards
"The fair is just the normal home-made cakes (decorated with smarties etc), tombolas, bouncy castle type affair.
Dancing display and footie tournament.
The usual mix of fun and tat." - GrimmatheNome
etc etc...ByAngelaoftheTimes
(That'll be £150 please...)