AbbyMN needs your "failure to progress" anecdotes

[AbbyMumsnet]

More editorial stuff going on at Chez Abs, so I'd be really grateful if you could post your anecdotes re' labours that failed to progress. Did you have your waters broken? Did it help? DId you have Oxytocin? DId that help? Was the baby poorly positioned - or was he/she too big or your pelvis too small? How was it for you, essentially.

Cheers all - really appreciate your help with this, particularly as may not be easiest experience to write about.

hellfire I've got two thick thick wads of notes from The Whittington on just that very topic

well what I will tell you is that it is all pretty unspeakable but it is the WAY in which the doctor handles you that makes the difference:
first time the doctor told me before we had to sign the consent forms to go and be slashed open that it wasn't a failure on my part but just a medical term she patted me on the back and that made all the difference
second time I could see the look of terror and bafflement in the 12 year old doctor's eyes and that pretty much set the tone for the second delivery although reasons for and results off pretty much the same.

I'm not sure it's worth going into much more detail as I have my healthy Fragrant Boys now and an untorn fanjo

good luck with your research

DS1 got stuck for an hour and a half. My pelvis is buggered - it's mis-aligned. DS1 had a mahoosive head and didn't want to budge. I had been having strong contractions for 18 hours (My second contraction came 1 minute after my first - and it continued in that way until the end of labour) and I was knackered and in pain. I had been told to shut up by some silly bint of a midwife, as "it couldn't be hurting that much"

Anyway, I had an emergency CS when they realised that DS1 was in MEGA distress and all ended well.

The worst bit for me was people's reactions after the birth, including one woman telling me that "I could never have a surgeon come near me with a knife just to get a baby out" Fucking bitch she was.

DP also used to make a joke about how I couldn't be bothered to give birth to DS properly. Normally, I'd have told him to fuck off, but with severe PND, it used to upset and offend me.

DS1 was an emergency CS after I failed to dilate properly. He was induced as he was very late (40+15) and the whole thing was pretty hideous. Pessaries started labour in the ward, but then they moved me to a really cold delivery room which was full of stuff that had been abandoned in there (trolleys and things) and you couldn't see out of the windows. I remember thinking 'I don't want to have my baby in here'.

Unsurprisingly, labour slowed down. Then they basically talked me into having my waters broken, I really didn't want to, eventually I agreed as they wheeled in doctor after doctor to tell me I had to. They did it, labour stopped completely.

So then they brought out the Syntocinon and I finally managed to get moved to a nicer room (new midwife on duty).

Eventually after about 20 hours I was 8cm but was only dilating on one side and DS' head was swelling up where it was getting bashed against my cervix (because there were no waters to pad it due to their evil persuasion earlier) so we went for the emergency CS.

The doctor who delivered him said she thought his head wasn't correctly positioned (he had been breech and had been turned with an ECV) and that was why labour hadn't started naturally, and why I hadn't dilated properly. At the time, I was so tired that I didn't care how he came out.

But 2.5 years later, I still cry whenever I hear of a friend who has delivered naturally, and I feel like such a failure for not being able to do it the normal way.

urrgh, I 'm hiding this thread
too many awful memories
I"d rather focus on the positive results

Littlemy, I actually called up the Birth Crisis Centre to speak to a counsellor to get closure over my feelings similar to the ones you describe
Perhaps it's not too late for you to do the same, it really helped

Might be tmi !

ds (1st dc)' delivery was worse than dd. Neither especially big but ds was op and had cord around his neck. Had ARM each time plus a stimulant with dd (small tablets dissolved in the mouth so no idea what) and they couldn't fix the drip in time . The senior mw coming along while I was struggling with ds and quipping "That's why they call it labour , love" was a real treat as his heart rate decelerated with each contraction. He ended up being ventouse but next day the mw who had looked after me on admission for about 2 hours (bearing in mind ds was born some 5 1/2 hour later) congraulated me on not having had a c- section as she'd expected. Anyway with each it was as if they'd got stuck at the u bend near my coccyx/pelvis - ds was yanked down by ventouse and dd by some careful, er, digital manipulation by the OB/GYN.

Went overdue. Was brought in for induction. Had four doses of prostin pessary over 4 days and still hadn't dilated at all. They were unwilling to get the syntocin drip started because my cervix wasn't 'ripe' at all. Was bullied into a c-section - had no idea about 'expectant management' at the time and the way the information was presented to me by the hospital staff made me think I had no choice in the matter.

My opinion? Due dates are not a science. I wasn't as overdue as they thought. And being strapped to CFM on my back in bed didn't help matters anyway.

I was a having a normal labour, afer 19 hrs I was 10 cm dilated and started to push. Then the contractions started to slow down and I given Syntocinon.

I felt the urge to push but when I pushed I couldnt feel anything. I told the MW I wasnt pushing against anything and she said I was. I told her I needed the toilet but she told me it was the babys head. I told her it wasnt but she wouldnt listen. (TMI .. but a little while later I proved I had needed to go to the toilet)

I kept reepeating that I was pushing against nothing but no one would listen.

After pushing for two hours the MW called in her supervisor who gave me an internal. She told me I was pushing well and called in the consultant who gave me another internal.

She told me I had to go to theatre, have an epidural so they could try forceps. They gave me a block at the same time as the epidural.

The doctor in theatre told me my baby was stuck on my pelvic bone and was too high up so I would have to have a c-section as he would damage me if he tried to use foreps.

Then a bit of panic set in and I think baby was in distress.

DD was born by c-section a while later, thankfully healthy.
I lost a pint of blood so I must have been hemoraging

1st time, after 36hrs of labour I was only at 8cms (and completely knackered). The hospital wouldn't let me eat at all so I had no energy. Doctor decided that I had been too long, I had my waters broken, nothing happened, Oxytocin, nothing happened! Ended up with an emergency CS and a lot of pain.

2nd time, 5 hrs labour I was desperate to avoid another CS but doctor said I wasn't progressing quickly enough (I was at 6cms) then DH heard MW outside saying they needed the room so I would be taken for a CS as I had had one before!!!

3rd time, baby coming by elective CS in November!

Thanks ever so x

a nice one now - i had dd at home, with a birthing pool. labour was quick to establish and progressed nicely. But the pool was so supportive and relaxing, and it was so lovely to be at home, and the midwives and my friends and my dh were so helpful, and the gas and air was so effective, that i just kind of slowed down and the contractions stopped being as strong or effective and my dialation slowed down at about 8cm.

Hopped (well, not quite) out of the pool, demanded my waters were broken (contrary to specific instructions made before and earlier in my birthing plan), jumped back in the pool and got back to work.

Stage 1 of labour - 5 hours; stage 2 - 2 contractions; dd fit and well at 9lbs 12 oz, everyone happy.

contractions started at 40+1

irregular but strong contractions for 2 days

Got to 8/9 centimetres all on my own by day 3 . MW was sure thath the baby would be here within a couple of hours.

Waters broke while midwife was giving me an internal (i suspect she tweaked them - as she was in the middle of showing me the hook thingie!)

Couple of hours passed - cervix now pretty inflamed (just saw my notes recently) and dispute whether I was 8 or 9 cm!

Put on Oxytocin drip for another couple of hours - no change

Ended up with emergency C-section which I was so grateful for - had had enough by then!

55 hours in total - ugh!

never had the urge to push - turned out dd was back to back and pretty well stuck - she came out with a very squint head and now her jaw still gets a bit squint when she is tired.

Want an elective C-section this time round!

I had my waters broken, and then I had to have a syntocin drip because I failed to progress after having diamorphine. I am under the impression that it was the diamorphine that made things grind to a halt.

labour ward staff were all very calm and professional, and explained things pleasantly, so I don't have any bad memories of the labour. Postnatal ward care was another matter though

Waters broke.

6 hours later agonising labour started.

12 hours later finally got to 3cm and had bucket loads of pain relief, except an epi cos no anaesthetist available.

6 hours after that finally got an epidural. Had made it to 5cm dilated at this point.

2 hours later still only at 5cm so had syntocinin drip.

2 hours later no further progression and mutterings about Em CS began.

2 hours later (so 24 horus of labour in total) still hadn't dilated any further so wheeled down to theatre ofr CS.

No specific reason given - dd was in right position, my pelvis is OK. DD was even quite a small one for a 39 weeker (les than 6lbs). Her head had gone partialy through my cervix though and the Dr had to pull her back up again. She was ne of the few CS born babies with a cone head!

Dr advised that next time I have an elective cos could well happen again (he mentioned mal-something?)- and I joyfully agreed!

Oh my care was fine, dd's oxygen levels were monitored and had dropped a bit towards the end. After care OK too - own room, remote tv etc!

with ds1:

2 days of horrid stop-start painful contractions initially misdiagnosed at labour ward as IBS

at 3cm dilated persuaded to have epidural

10cm within the hour

then all stopped. completely and utterly stopped.

ARM + syntocin. not a lot of help

pushing

ventouse

ds1 did have a big head for his gestation (38 weeks) and size, but it wasn't that. I reckon not enough moving around initially (I believed the IBS and lay down for a day ) + too much intervention later on.

ds2 ventouse too but because of sudden distress after very speedy labour that would have been unplanned HB and probably horrid emergency had I not had a monitoring appt for overdueness that day.

Eeek. I had an induction and ended up with ventouse delivery - think I was too tired and in the wrong position to push effectively by that time, I'd been given an hour to do it (at the Whittington, like SuzyWong but not as bad an experience). My labour was very slow, I don't think it ever stopped progressing it just wasn't moving at the speed they thought it should. I think the oxytocin (?) drip was part of the problem, as it meant I was hooked up to a monitor and lying on my back, or partially so, for the 20 hours in the delivery room (started contractions about 6 hours or so before that).

I'm shocked by the stories of insensitive comments on caesarians.

I also think my induction was a little too early - it was coming up to a bank holiday weekend and they'd just accepted LMP date as due date - this time round my scan date is nearly 2 weeks later than LMP. The problem with oxytocin/syntocin is that you have to be hoooked up to a monitor, rules out all the ideas you might have had about an active birth.

with dd i had mild on and off contractions all weekend and went into full labour at 9pm on sunday night. at 12 my contractios were less than 5 mins apart so headed to hospital rather naively, only to be told i was half a cm dilated and would be a while yet. i went home as i couldn't stand the thought of a night in hospital and spent all night having serious contractions every 1-5 mins, eventually went back in at 12pm the next day to be told... you're 3cm

they broke my waters at that point and found blood in them so i was put on continuous monitoring. once they broke my waters things flew along fairly rapidly, contractions came thick and fast and really felt like they were productive for the first time. however dd's heartrate started to plummet and they manually stretched my cervix at 8cm to get her out asap and she was born flat at 14.53 and had to be resusitated, the cord had been around her shoulder. i now believe she must have been back to back and turned mid labour which caused her to get tangled in the cord (she had one arm up over her face as well)

with ds i started having very irregular contractions at 5/6am and went into hospital at 9pm that night thinking i must be far enough alone by then..... 3cm they broke my waters again and he was born at 23.50 facing the wrong way with one hand over his face just like big sis!

with both of mine i found that once my waters broke things flew but i still think i'd rather avoid that with dc3 as i've read up on posterior labours and it can cause more problems than it fixes in those situations.

Waters broke Fri evening on due date. Midwife came round to check me and I was about 2cm dilated. Mild labour started Sat lunchtime and I popped into hospital to meet midwife to go on the machine quickly so she could check all was ok still. Went home, actually went for a drink at DH's footy club first, and then had to leave as contractions were getting stronger. Called the midwife from home about 8pm to let her know we were moving on. She came over and I think we went to hospital about 11pmish. Had g&a, then diamorphine but was still not getting anywhere dilation wise. Had an epidural so I could be induced. Again, no change in dilation. Baby went tachycardic so discussions started and I was advised to go for an emcs. Turns out the little wotsit had the cord wrapped round him so could have been there a month of sundays and not got him out. Was desperately upset about not pushing him out at first until my midwife pointed out that in previous times, babies with the cord round them were the ones they lost . This brought me swiftly to my senses about the whole issue and made me realise that as long as we were both ok it didn't matter how he arrived. Then, to really cheer me up, she looked at me, smiled naughtily and stage whispered "Remember - you'll always be honeymoon fresh down there because of it" and gave me a wink. Love that woman.

weds evening: waters broke spontaneously, nothing else. head not engaged, not dilated.
thurs evening: gel induction + gas and air
no further progress despite many midwives shovign their arm up.
fri evening: more gel + g&A
still no progress. more examinations.
sat evening:syntocin drip (not allowed epidural, blood test not done) + g&a + that injection that makes you sick (forgotten name sorry)
a person came with a big hook and shoved it up to 'check whether waters had broken' well i had been in a puddle for four days and with hindsight i should have told him where to shove his hook.
mw forgot to label the drip and got disciplined. i'd much rather she'd got into trouble for not giving me enough to drink, not letting me have a wee, strapping the monitor on wrongly and telling me i wasn't having any contractions and to stop making a fuss, and putting the bed on an incline which meant i had to cling on with my toes for 9 hours, but this was not important apparently.
sunday morning: cs.

i had no sleep from thurs evening onwards and no bf support after the birth, although one of the mw falsified the notes to say that i had. one also taunted me "why's your baby crying eh? EH?" because i wouldn't give him a bottle. they took him away and gave him one in the end, wouldn't even let me do it.

all the gel inductions were given at night so dh was sent away and i was left alone in the ward trying not to keep everyone awake.

i have no idea why things didn't progress but do surmise that being stuck on a bed for five days without sleep and terrified wasn't exactly encouraging things along. i did complain but not about everythign, because i didn't have any evidence.

I was induced at 39 + 1 as I had been having small bleeds on and off during my pregnancy. First baby, very excited, and had written my no drugs/ dim lights/ active labour birth plan, went to labour ward in crisply ironed white linen shirt, my best trousers, and a light make up applied. who knew?

I was monitored, taken to labour ward, told to get in the bed, had my waters broken and was hooked up to a monitor, and given a synto drip.

within half an hour, i felt as though i was being repeatedly smacked against a brick wall , every 3 minutes, and I had no idea how to deal with the pain

MW offered me diamorphine, at no point was I encouraged to mobilise, or use gas & air, and work with the contractions. I was given drugs that made me sick and dizzy and i lay in bed.

after several hours, i was assessed, and not progressing, so was told to have an epidural as labour was going to be long and i would not manage it

aneasthatist tooks multiple attempts to site it, i was so afraid , i needed the epidural as the MW had said i would not manage otherwise, and i was terrified. and my ctx stopped and never really restarted.

i was taken in for an emergecny c.s as DS was pressing on my bladder and my catheter bag was filling with blood.

baby was fine, no distress though

trying to sign consent, take off nursing bra and my jewellery and have the MW remove the top inch of my pubes with a bic razor.. aneasthatist faffing with the epidural ,and getting in the way . MW told him to leave the room so i could take my bra off..

convinced i would die

wheeled into theatre, looked at ceiling which was splashed with iodine, remembered asking if it was blood and everyone laughing.

just about to ask them to recheck i was numb, when the doc said, look, here;s your baby ! and there he was

i then spent the next 45 minutes shaking violently, vomiting and feeling horrific, whilst DH held my fully washed and dressed baby next to my face , but all i could touch was his face.

i remember going back to my room and passing out with all the drugs and tiredness and waking up several hours later alone, in the dark, in a pool of blood , i agony and my baby was not in the room

i was cleaned up, given some water, and told the midwives would look after my baby, not even asked if i wanted to breastfeed.

this was friday, and i did not hold my baby on my own until sunday evening.

i was 2-3 cm for the whole labour due I think to being induced too soon and being immobile for the whole time.

i was traumatised , especially afterwards, when i kept being told that i should be glad to have had a c.section, so i didn't have to go through all the nasty pushing. because major abdominal surgery is a walk in the park

and the stupid health visitor who did not do the PN questionnaire with me at 6 weeks as i felt so unwell, so she wanted to wait until i felt better

it took 4 years to recover from the PND

on a happier note, I had a wonderful, positive and inspiring VBAC with DD almost 6 years later and have made helping other women with birth trauma my mission! It also got me on the path to being a doula and childbirth educator, and i gave a talk recently at a midwifery conference about the very different impacts my two births had on my life

and breathe !

i had an MRI scan postnatally to see if my pelvis was too narrow. it is not, it is normal.

i strongly believe i had an OP baby, who was simply not ready to be born, my bishops score at induction was 5, which is low, and with the lack of mobility, malpositioned baby etc it was a hiding to nothing.

DD was OP and i had hours of ctx before active labour started . i was 2-3 cm for days before i went to the latent phase, and that was 15 hours long, then she was born after 2 hours 45 of established labour, with no intervention and no problems at all.