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Original poster

Carpark Scrape - I drove off...

136 replies

MaryPoppinsMassiveSack · 16/04/2013 19:59

Hello,

Marginally late for the school run this morning I managed to touch the car parked next to me whilst maneuvering. I checked and there was very little damage / no dent and (being a bit late) I think no one saw.

So I drove off smartly.

But what if the school has cameras or someone did see, touching another car is just one of those things, isn't it?

OP posts:
MrsOakenshield · 16/04/2013 21:30

This reply has been deleted

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MNHQ
JulieMumsnet · 16/04/2013 21:31

Evening.

We'd like to remind you of our fabulous Talk guidelines

TantrumsAndBalloons · 16/04/2013 21:36

Ah I missed the part about the private, fee paying school.

Of course it's ok to scrape the teachers car, after all you pay their wages don't you?

Silly me. Mine go to a state school you see. We don't tend to give up being decent people along with the school fees. Luckily enough, most parents at private schools don't either. But I suppose there always has to be one.

WMittens · 16/04/2013 22:20

unlucky83

"...a minor scratch that hasn't broken the paint (so won't rust) is not the end of the world..."

What about a deep scratch on a Jaguar XJ or an Audi A8? They're aluminium bodied, so not going to rust - does that make a deep scratch OK?

BabylonReturns · 16/04/2013 22:31

Some kind sole took the wing mirror off my car today. It's ok, it's only about £250 for a replacement, the DCs will get new shoes eventually.

Own up op it's the right thing to do.

unlucky83 · 16/04/2013 23:47

WMittens My first sentence was 'I think you should confess' -
I would confess and neither I nor my children open doors into peoples cars etc..we do respect other people's property....
However a deep scratch wouldn't be the end of the world on my car (and it isn't aluminum) -I would be a little miffed but only a little because it is a box for getting from A to B and it will still perform that function...
I have had my wing mirror smashed whilst parked on the road - more than once - which upset me more because it is something you HAVE to fix - then again I have a 'sensible' car so these things aren't that expensive...(and I wouldn't claim for that on my insurance...)
(BTW Babylon Sad- is it a whole new mirror (hanging off) ? -or just the glass - you can get a mirror that sticks over the broken one from places like Halfrauds for less than £10 IIRC- I've done that once and it worked fine...before someone then tried to knock it off completely ... and (depending on your car) you might be able to get one from a scrap yard/or not manufacturers original for a lot less than for your main dealer and get a local garage to fit (or do it yourself - not v. difficult)

Each to their own etc but...personally I really can't get my head around why people spend a fortune on any car - I'd much rather keep my money in the bank - even earning the current rubbish 2% interest - so that hopefully my children can buy somewhere to live without a mortgage and never have to worry about money ...or even just have a good holiday - rather than buy something that has halved in value as soon as you drive it out the showroom..unless of course you have more than enough money ....
I think the adage if you can't keep it safe and can't afford to lose it - you shouldn't have got it in the first place...applies...
If you have a precious classic car etc - just for fun/ playing with at the weekend - then don't leave it unattended in a public place where it could get damaged - it could easily happen and there are some not very nice people out there - and especially not if you are going to get really upset by that because you really feel it in your pocket to sort it out ...

chickydoo · 16/04/2013 23:51

I knocked a cars wing mirror off in the school car park, I felt dreadful! Left a note, and my details with the school.
The woman concerned was so glad I had owned up to it, she said she could never had afforded to get it fixed. It cost me £80, was my fault so I paid the price... That's life.

featherbag · 17/04/2013 08:04

OP I sincerely hope a police officer turns up to arrest you for leaving the scene of an accident. You are a criminal and I hope your private school manages to teach your children some morals, as it appears unlikely you'll bother/be able to do so.

Original poster
MaryPoppinsMassiveSack · 17/04/2013 08:57

Ok, I survived the night with no police roundup. So that was nice. Today I shall be speaking to the school. Thanks for worrying me uneccesarily about the police at my door mn. I'm now tired and scared.

OP posts:
austenozzy · 17/04/2013 09:02

yes, it's all the fault of an anonymous online forum, 98% of which said you're culpable for a minor criminal act.

featherbag · 17/04/2013 09:07

It was far from unnecessary, the police turning up was a very real potential consequence of what you did. Hopefully you'll think twice before behaving in such a dishonest and reprehensible manner again.

Caitycat · 17/04/2013 09:24

Glad you are owning up! My sister when she was young and scared damaged someone's car in a Sainsbury's carpark. She drove off in a panic, realised what she had done and then drove back to look for the car but couldn't find it. She got a letter from the police two months after the event so just because noone came to your door last night doesn't mean noone will but reporting it should mean they will call off the feds!

MandragoraWurzelstock · 17/04/2013 09:34

I think some of you are enjoying this a bit too much!! Smile

OP, I hope you manage to sort it out. I agree that your approach of 'did anyone see' was a bit misguided, I think you realise now that it's something that affects other people. But I am sorry you had a rubbish night.

often it pays to speak up when something happens, people sometimes respond well to honesty - good luck.

WMittens · 17/04/2013 13:26

I think the adage if you can't keep it safe and can't afford to lose it - you shouldn't have got it in the first place...applies...

Personally I go by, "respect other people's property".

"Don't leave it unattended in a public place" - I should be able to park in a supermarket carpark, do a bit of shopping and return to my car without it having a fuck off great scratch down the side because someone else doesn't "get" my interests.

difficultpickle · 17/04/2013 13:31

OP your worry was completely self inflicted. If you had done what you should have done then you would have had nothing to worry about at all. I assume you won't bother owning up in RL unless someone has actually seen you do it and reported it. If you had any intention you would have dealt with this properly at the time.

MandragoraWurzelstock · 17/04/2013 13:34

I agreewith you there WM. The thing is t hough, which I can't understand, is that cars DO get bumped - it's so common - yet people still appear to be so attached to their vehicle that they get very upset by this.
If you're going to drive a very heavy, very powerful metal box around on the same roads as thousands of other metal boxes, all with rather fragile paintwork, and a good few proper eejits among them too - isn't it a bit like setting yourself up for misery? Surely it's going to happen at some point.

Not saying you shouldn't love your car and I hate it if people are really dishonest - it's their fault not yours - but can you see what I'm getting at?

Why are cars not made a bit more robust, to start with (is it a weight issue) and why not anticipate that they will get a bit bashed on occasion, and adjust your thinking so it doesn't make you so angry?

Fragglewump · 17/04/2013 13:35

Wtf??? I would be boiling mad if someone scraped my car then buggered off!!!! How horrible!! Own up and don't be so spineless!

MandragoraWurzelstock · 17/04/2013 13:36

fwiw I am a bit upset that our car has so many scratches INside it. I don't know why they're not made to cope with carrying things like wood, and having dirty children in them. I want a car you can hose out. Not rubbish plasticky fascia and nylon carpet you can't get stuff out of.

cheesesarnie · 17/04/2013 13:43

I got really upset when someone did this to my car.
It isn't the best looking shiniest car but I brought it myself! after i left dh i brought my car, the first that belonged to just me and no one else. i sorted tax, mot and insurance for the first time ever and then someone scrapped it! i was so upset! obviously i had bigger things going on but it was the principle!

well done for doing the right thing in the end though op.

WMittens · 17/04/2013 13:44

...cars DO get bumped - it's so common - yet people still appear to be so attached to their vehicle that they get very upset by this.

That is true, but it is because the eejits don't give enough of a stuff that it is common; if the drivers who don't take care, took care, then bumps would not be so common. So I don't see me being at fault for caring, I see them at fault for not caring.

In honesty I don't give a shit that they don't give a shit about their cars, that's their prerogative (and I own/have owned/kept cars that I didn't give a shit about), but I always give a shit about other people's property, and respect them and their choices.

If I did make a mistake and damage someone's car I would own up, I wouldn't dream of doing anything else, and I'm glad to see the OP has had a change of heart.

unlucky83 · 17/04/2013 13:47

WMittens - I said (again) I would confess and I do respect other people's property -but lots of people don't...

If you left a £50 note on a park bench - some people (me included) would hand it in to the police -other people wouldn't - that's life...
If it was mine I would think I was lucky that someone handed it in and I should have kept it safe...been more careful.

Of course in a perfect world you should be able to leave your car where you like ...but this is the real world - my solution - get a car that you don't have to worry about...less stress...and if you want a 'special' car accept that you have to take special care of it...and not leave it in a supermarket carpark ...

WMittens · 17/04/2013 13:52

Why are cars not made a bit more robust, to start with (is it a weight issue)

I don't know why they're not made to cope with carrying things like wood, and having dirty children in them.

Cars are very robust (and very heavy) and it's mostly due to safety legislation. However, body panels are often there to absorb the shock so it isn't transmitted to the occupants.

Aside from that, it comes down to cost - paint quality varies from manufacturer to manufacturer, but in any case if something is harder than the paint (or rather, the clearcoat) it is going to come off worse - so a metal screwdriver beats paint, paint beats soft plastic, etc. etc.

WIth regards to interiors, it comes down to demand - you can by a completely utilitarian vehicle that you can hose out, etc. - it's called a Ford Transit Double Cab. No one really wants a vehicle that basic, they want comfort and an appropriate level of (perceived) quality for what they've paid. There may be a solution that covers both, but it would cost so much no one would buy it.

WMittens · 17/04/2013 14:00

and if you want a 'special' car accept that you have to take special care of it

I do take special care of it; leaving it in a car park (the clue's in the name) is not an unreasonable thing to do with a car. I have successfully avoided Mercedes, Porsches, and even a Ferrari, along with every other car; is it so difficult?

I understand perfectly that accidents happen, and that is not my issue; my issue is the attitude of, "oh well nevermind, it's only a box on wheels," or, "well you shouldn't have such an expensive car." It is selfish and inconsiderate, maybe slightly jealous and shows a childish lack of responsibility - mistakes get made, no problem - own up to the fact that you* may be wrong.

*The royal 'you'

MandragoraWurzelstock · 17/04/2013 14:12

I agree that people should own up if the damage is more than very tiny.

Thanks for the tip about Transits...my first car was in fact a LWB 4 litre 1971 transit, so looking back you're right.

I am seriously thinking of getting another Smile

MrsSpagBol · 17/04/2013 14:14

^ what WM Mittens said.