Independent School in London

[mljainldn]

Me and my family just moved back to the UK this summer from Hong Kong and my 16 yr old son is currently in the lower sixth boarding school but is extremely miserable. We hope to move him to an independent co-ed day school in London and realised that it is an extremely challenging situation. We are looking for schools with a cosmopolitan demographic, nurturing and with good but not overly strict discipline. Most importantly, a school that is genuine care about the wellbeing of children. Both me and my husband are unfamiliar with schools in London after being away for 30 years, and we could only rely on information on the internet but worry that we might make the wrong decision. We wish to reach out to all mums and dads with young teenage children on this forum, and would be most grateful if you could please share with us any recommendations and reputable schools that you may have in mind. Any feedback and advice will be greatly appreciated.

I think you are going to have to look at smaller schools a bit further out. Kew House, Radnor House, Halliford boys only. Hampton court House. Rochester independent College. Mill Hill as previously suggested. Thames Christian school.
has your son been doing the British curriculum so far. If not also look at international schools.
what is your local state school?

Potential international schools
https://www.southbank.org/
https://halcyonschool.com/?utm_term=&utm_campaign=&utm_source=adwords&utm_medium=ppc&hsa_acc=7463673200&hsa_cam=20213638784&hsa_grp=&hsa_ad=&hsa_src=x&hsa_tgt=&hsa_kw=&hsa_mt=&hsa_net=adwords&hsa_ver=3&gclid=EAIaIQobChMI4ZjG1tqgggMVFWHmCh1QEgotEAAYASAAEgIuUvD_BwE
no idea what they are like

Other schools to look are Ewell Castle and The Hall school Wimbledon which has a new untested sixth form but may have space.

Try state schools- Kings Maths School in Kennington if he is really good at Maths and Physics and willing to do Computing.

The trouble with private schools is that they are essentially businesses so they might think it strange that your son is quitting another private school where you presumably have to give the full notice and will be out of pocket. So personally I would go state and your local authority will have to find you a state school place.

A lot of independent schools do not have a problem with students changing part way through their A levels, it's whether they have space and point in the year. A friend's DC moved from a boarding school to a London day school for sixth form in January and repeated Yr 12 (should have been in Yr13) and it wasn't too stressful. Some will only consider taking a Yr 13 student into Yr 12 at the beginning of the academic year.
The same friend had zero response from the three state schools & colleges she contacted.

The trouble with private schools is that they are essentially businesses so they might think it strange that your son is quitting another private school where you presumably have to give the full notice and will be out of pocket.

Actually I’ve heard the opposite - private schools can welcome the chance to do a better job than one of their competitors, especially if it’s clearly not a problem with the child (ie not someone kicked out for awful behaviour).

Thank you for all the information, much appreciated

OP I would also get to the bottom of why he is so unhappy e.g. bullying. In that case, the school should let him go immediately with no notice if he has trauma from that although you might have to fight your case. Anyone bullied/teased at boarding school is in a terrible environment because there is no getting away from it into a safe space. Sometimes a school might let you change house if you stand your ground and that is a feasible option.
The alternative if the school is also day, as well as boarding, is to rent a studio flat next door and for you to live with him there (if you can afford it). That may be the least disruptive option for him.

I want to express my heartfelt gratitude to all who came to me with all the information and advice, I contacted all of them. We have now three potential offers:

Kew House
Fulham
Kenaington Park

do any one of you have any advice to share with me on the above please ?

I have no experience of those schools but just wanted to say I am pleased MN could help. Just having options must be a real weight off everyone’s shoulders.

Ah that’s great OP! No personal experience here either but if you do a google search for “mumsnet <name of school>” you may find some views. Are you able to visit the schools - appreciate time is ticking but visiting on a school day can be really helpful.

For those suggesting Highgate or Latymer Upper - sorry, but I think that's VERY misguided. Both schools, particularly Highgate, extremely sought after and competitive. It's massively unlikely they'd take a student midway through A-level.

Misguided? Is there any downside to ask 2 more schools?
Sorry, OP is also looking for the cosmopolitan outlook, of which the schools have a higher chance of places due to international movements.

Kew House parent here. It's a small but friendly school. Excellent pastoral care. DT is a big focus for them but I don't know if it's offered in 6th form. Not super selective so there's a range of academic ability. Fairly diverse in terms of interests and personalities but it's a private school so you won't get a fully diverse experience. Support for things like Oxbridge and medicine isn't the same as top privates but it's still ok. We have been very happy with it (first child started there in 2015 and his sister followed a few years later).

Thank you for the sharing your own experience and information, really appreciate it.

If in North London I'd say it's worth getting in touch with KAS (King Alfred's School - no uniform, very gentle and understanding about unhappy kids) or possibly DLD or MPW - they're former crammers but can suit kids who don't like the school

OP, where was he at school in Hong Kong - SPC/Harrow/Kellett ? I also used to live in HK.

Coed highly academic independent schools are very rare in London. Would you consider looking at single sex schools that have a track record of welcoming HK and Chinese mainland children? Dulwich is the one that comes to mind. But yes, it may well be that your DS should restart his A levels next year.

It sounds like you will pick one of the 2 who have made offers (I haven't heard of those). MPW (tutorial college) for sixth form as someone else mentioned above might be another option (in Kensington., mixed)

I live in Kew. Kew House is one of the local privates and know a few friends with happy kids there. A bit cramped would be the main downside (it is a urban school after all). Of those three I think Kensington Park is the less established one and would be bottom of my list. But also depends on what kind of crowd you are looking for, KP will be more transient / international / Londoner and expats. Kew House and Fulham more catering for the locals, especially KH.

Could also contact St Christopher in Herts. They have taken on kids who have struggled in other schools and turned things around for them. Very good pastoral care. Lots of buses into London and can flexi board if he wants to do the odd night. Worth seeing if they have space.

He has been an Co-ed since commencing school so I don't think it will be a wise choice for him at A Level. Has checked Dulwich but unfortunately it is full.

Understood.

Have you tried Epsom/Reeds, not as cosmopolitan but might be able to accommodate? I think both are coed in 6th form.

I feel for you OP, this is obviously a difficult situation. Is there anything that can be done to help him in his current school environment, or is there no choice but to move schools? Can pastoral care get involved to support him? It sounds like you’re stuck between a rock and a hard place - moving him will be a big upheaval too. Good luck.

Thank you for your kind words @Yellownotblue . As you may be aware that in HK international schools, it has a very cosmopolitan demographic, less strict. but this is not the case in the new environment, mostly local kids with a small percentage of overseas students but not too many in his year group. nothing wrong with this, it just that he is finding it difficult to integrate. Teachers are very supportive and understanding, no complain about the pastoral care, regretably, the switch from an international day school to boarding does not help him to cope with the regimented boarding lifestyle and he is really unhappy and did not thrive and lost motivation in his learning.

Yes, that’s a big change to adapt to. Is he at one of the boarding schools that are popular with HKers (Eton/Harrow/Winch/Rugby)? Either way, it sounds like boarding isn’t for him, which is perfectly understandable, but you are now in a difficult situation.

What about some of the better state sixth form colleges, a friend’s son is at Godalming in Surrey and seems happy. They have a Design A Level, I don’t know if this is the same as DT? It would be a long commute, but might be worth it for his mental health.

Also - a HK family I know had their boy unhappy at Hampton, he moved to Whitgift and is now very happy. Might be worth a try? But would be boys only (not co ed)