How are places at state boarding schools allocated?

[BikeRunSki]

DM lives close to a very good state boarding school (we live 200 miles away).DS will be starting secondary school in 2 yrs time, and asked if we’d considered sending him there? Its not something we’d ever thought about (we are rural and there is only one high school we can feasibly access), but DM has got me thinking.

Is state boarding reserved for looked after children and children of military/crown servants working overseas, or can anyone apply?

Thank you for all your input. I really don’t know if this is something we will pursue. DS is not against the idea. He has a very close relationship with DM, and is always desperately sad that she never sees his concerts, sports matches etc. Until a few days ago. I hadn’t even realised that this was an option. As we are rural, with only one state high school available to us, or was/is interesting to have another option to consider. My initial question was not whether to send DS to boarding school, but to explore whether this is a was a realistic option for people with no boarding need. DS’s secondary application will need to be done this time next year for Y7 entry*. It is something we will look at as a family, to see what works best for us.

• to complicate matters further, where we are, children change schools at Y6 and Y9, so going to a secondary school would mean changing at Y6 and then Y7.

Our SBS has intake at Y7, Y9 and Y12.
Do you want to name the target school?

The school close to DM is Sexey’s.
Since I started thinking about this I have discovered Burford school, about as close to my PIL, is also a SBS!

Co-ed, good proportion of boarding pupils, will accept boarders in any year from Y7 upwards. Sounds good!

Burford has a tiny proportion of boarders (90 out of 1137).

There's a state boarding school near me.
I know many parents use it as an alternative option. Eg they work long hours, child would have long journey anyway so save 2-3 hours a day travelling etc.

I'd say is a fantastic option for families of lesser means than public boarding school but who need the flexibility of boarding due to lifestyles.

I'm baffled by this thread. Why do neither you or your mother want DC living with them? Why does he need to be sent away? I think you'd find a high number of children in that kind of establishment with emotional difficulties at the very least. Why subject him to that for no reason.

Babymama troll off. State boarding schools are excellent and most are highly academic. Educate yourself before making such ignorant comments.

Babymama
Where did I say that I didn’t want DS living with me? I have repeatedly said that we live rurally and can only access one high school, so the concept of state boarding could given us more options.

DM wouldn’t want DS living with her, because by the time he is high school age she will bf in her 80s, I think that’s fair enough. She is widowed, but already has one adult dependant. She really would but appreciate a teenager too.

I'm not a troll- quite the opposite. I just strongly feel the best place for most children is with their parents. I'm not trying to be offensive with that. I was raised by a boarding school product ie my father and I believe the experience honestly stunted his emotional development. Anyway clearly I am not the input you wanted on this thread so I will leave it.

Yes Babymamama, that's your view not a universal one.

OP was perfectly clear she was just exploring options. Now can you help,her with her question about boarding, or are you just going to criticise her for even thinking about it?

What would you do, if you had Hobson's Choice for schools but were unable to move?

And if course you cannot use grandparents for just a tee time address to apply for a more 'desirable' school. Your DC would have to live their as main residence year round. So would be far more cut off from parents than one who goes home for holidays exeats etc.

Of course, not every DC wants to board, and it would be utterly wrong to put a child not suited for boarding into a residential school unless there was really no other option. By secondary age, DC can usually state their opinions on this quite strongly.

I was raised by a boarding school product ie my father and I believe the experience honestly stunted his emotional development.

He was probably at boarding school half a century ago so is that input at all relevant? It would be equivalent to my brother warning against grammar schools because they throw blackboard-rubbers at you. Or me warning against primary schools because they make you drink milk that is going off because it has been left out in the sun all morning.
OP wants to know what may happen in the future, for her DS, not what happened in the past, to your DF.

Wouldn't it be lovely if we could have just one thread about boarding without it being derailed by headless chickens shrieking about emotional damage and harking back to a distant past.

Be warned OP, when you have DC at boarding school you have to deal with numpties like this a lot.

OP you need to distinguish between "need to board" and "suitability for boarding". There is a strict oversubscription policy that covers "need to board" (LAC, military and so on). However if you look at the admissions policy you will see that the first thing they talk about is "suitability for boarding". This is a woolly assessment (how can it be anything but) of the child's character and trying to figure out if they and the school are a good fit.
You and DS need to concentrate on 'suitability' and not 'need'.

Thank you for all your input ladies.
My dad, step dad* and uncles were all products of a 1940s/50s boarding school education, so I am actually well aware of what Babymamama is alluding to.

I’m going to hide this thread now, as it has become a little detailed. I have had a lot of food for thought, and all you with recent experience of state boarding have been extremely helpful sharing your experiences and advice. I will consider DS’s secondary edication options in the context of my family and what would suit my son. The school we could go to locally is not a bad school (in fact is Outstanding), i’m just not convinced that it’s a great school for DS. I went to a school that was convenient, but a terrible fit, I was miserable for 7 years and left with some very poor A levels (thank God for the old polytechnics!). Obviously, Sexey’s may not be a great fit either, but it could give us an option.

Thank you too to flourypotato for pointing out the difference between “need” and “suitability” to board.

*the reason I have a step dad is not because boarding school made my dad was emotionally damaged by boarding school, but because he died. Of non emotional causes. His mental health was fine.