Angry 9pm emails to teachers of Independent schools

[jeanne16]

This is very common apparently, according to Daily Mail article. After a glass of wine, parents fire off angry emails to teachers, expecting instant replies.

So have you ever done this and if so, what was your complaint?

[MidLifeCrisis007]

I sent an email (of a very routine nature) to my DD's headmistress at 11.00am last month. She responded at 1.11 am! Now that's what I call dedication....

[Badbadbunny]

I don't know why this has been made into such a big deal. I run my own business and can get emails at all times of the day and during weekends from clients with unrealistic expectations. It must happen in all walks of life - more often when people are paying for a service and they think they "own" the person providing it. Why do people think it's newsworthy just because it relates to education?

I have a simple way of dealing with it. I just don't open/read emails outside work hours. They get dealt with asap on my next working day. To be honest, I never give it a second thought what time of day it was sent or even what day - I barely look at the times/dates - I just work through them in the order they are received down my screen.

I do it this way because I've had too many evenings and weekends ruined by people who have embraced the entitlement and "me, me, me" culture. I've had sleepless nights when I've opened an email late into the evening and couldn't get the matter out of my head. It's just not worth it, so now it's working hours only!

[Jeremysfavouriteaunt]

I didn't realise that me emailing at 2am meant that it was assumed I expected a reply then. I email when I get a chance, no expectation of a reply until the teacher has time.

[LottieDoubtie]

Members of the Association of Teachers and Lecturers said that staff at private schools were expected to respond to emails and phone calls ‘24/7’.

I am both a member of the ATL and a Teacher at an independent school. This doesn't reflect my experience at all. We are expected to respond to parents within 24 hours of receiving the email- but this can be a holding response as long as we are then proactive about following up whatever the problem is and responding appropriately within a reasonable time frame.

I have worked at several different schools in my time and this has always been the email policy.

[ZedWoman]

TBH, I find that emails from students are far more demanding (secondary). Our students can access anyone on internal email, which is great for submitting homework and questions. However, they seem to think that any questions they have should be answers NOW regardless of when sent. By flagging a message as 'high priority' they seem to think it should actually be answered before they've hit the 'send' button.

I personally love the emails from students that start with 'I hope you are enjoying your holiday' and end with 'can you send me this during the holiday so I can prepare'.

[LottieDoubtie]

zed Yes, I agree! Sometimes students are very demanding by email. I don't have any hesitation in ignoring them if they are rude though!

[Heartbroken4]

Jack can you link?

[FanDabbyFloozy]

Am I in the only school that doesn't give out the teachers' email addresses to parents? Teachers are very good at calling you back if you leave a message though, which works well, and also great at arranging meetings if you need to speak for 10 minutes on a serious matter.

[apple1992]

Fan - ours doesn't give out email addresses unless individual teachers offer it. I occasionally give it out, but not often.

[Hulababy]

I've never sent an email of complaint etc to dd's school. To be honest, especially at primary, I wouldn't have thought email was the best form for a complaint personally, but have been lucky to not need to do so regardless.

I have sent emails to school but I tend to save to draft and then email in normal work type hours, rather than 'unsocial' hours.

My work emails come to my phone so do arrive as and when. If I got a complaint through I would probably feel I should respond straight away but would try not to - it would be better to wait, digest, discuss and then respond.

[PiqueABoo]

"Am I in the only school that doesn't give out the teachers' email addresses to parents?"

Nope, but all the children at DD's school have an e-mail account in the same e-mail system so I just get her to logon and look up the one I want.

That said I've yet to send an e-mail that wasn't invited in person e.g. teacher suggested it at parents' evening, except for a genuinely urgent/significant query re. a trip.

[Clonakiltylil]

I've just come out of hospital after having collapsed at the end of term through exhaustion. And although I am on holiday, I am working, preparing schemes and marking A level and GCSE exam questions, predominantly, I am not checking emails. And I won't even log on until 8am on my first day back -which, given my health, won't be when everyone else goes back, Nothing is that urgent, in my opinion. And if I am out of the loop, so be it. My mental health is more important.

[crazycatguy]

I work at an indie. Our head has told us that he would never expect an email sent after 6:30, and so when a parent emails, to turn it round within 48 hours.

6:30 is the time the school closes and kocks staff off site and therefore any time in the 2hr45 mins after the kids go home is ample time.

In an attempt to look after my own wellbeing, email stops for the day at 7:30 (though marking often goes on after!).

[YesThisIsMe]

We get a letter at the beginning of each year from form teachers giving the teacher's email address and pointing out the bleeding obvious fact that it's very difficult to get through to a teacher by telephone during the working day so email is preferred which she can reply to when she's free. I'd be gutted if I thought that my late night emails were construed as expecting an immediate reply. I assume that she runs through them first thing in the morning on the train in in order to see if there's anything important coming up that day, and to whizz off instant replies to trivial "Jocasta needs to be excused to go to the orthodontist on Friday" messages - because that's what I do.

I feel that that the OP/journalist doesn't understand the difference between email and telephones. Maybe she's new to this century.

[happygardening]

We are provided with the email addresses of every member of staff in the termly diary we are sent. I send emails when I've got time to send them so it could easily be late at night but I never "fire off angry ones". If I was angry about something I'd sent an email to our HM in the first instance asking him to call me at his ealiest convenience (probably also detailing times when I was free as I'm not always available to answer the phone) to discuss an issue I was concerned about (just need to add I've never had to do this). Personally I think firing off angry email to anyone is inappropriate it's easy for the recipient to misinterpret what you're writing face to face or if impossible by phone is always much better for both sides. Ive probably sent him 40 emails in five years most of those are apologies for not completely travel arrangements on the schools website, I understand from a friend who's an HM (different school) that this is unusual most parents send a lot more. Over the years I've also very occasionally (no more than four times) emailed specific subject teachers I'm always stunned by how quickly they reply be it evenings weekends or even holidays usually 2-3. Our HM frequently emails at 2 in the morning. Just to add I don't expect an instant reply obviously being at a boarding school means that staff are available 24/7 but for non urgent stuff 2-3 day would be fine as far as I'm concerned.
The question is do we need really staff emails? Obviously at a boarding school you need the HM's email but do we need all the other teachers emails? Obviously in the pre email era we couldn't do this. My friend who's the HM was saying the other week that he was talking to an old HM about this. He was saying that in his day parents wrote letter instead unless it was life and death. The letter took two to three days before they landed on his desk, he'd then think about it for 2-3 days before composing a reply in 85% of cases by then the problem had generally resolved itself!

[happygardening]

Trying to say they reply in 2-3 hours.

[happygardening]

That doesn't make sense! Most staff at DS's school reply to email in 2-3 hours I would be happy to receive a reply in 2-3 days for non urgent stuff.

[Perseus]

I send emails to our private school at night because that is when I have got to grips with the problem after talking to DS etc.

I don't expect a reply for several days.

[RalphSteadmansEye]

We're not routinely given staff email addresses at ds's independent school. I email the SENCO periodically and she me.

I have 'collected' a few more addresses since ds had a week off with an injury and core subject teachers emailed work home. For everything else, I write a note in his planner, which is what they are for.

I work in a secondary school (not a teacher) and have students and occasionally parents emailing at all times of night. I reply to students and parents in the daytime only, even though I reply to colleagues at all times of night.

[loosechange]

I send emails at night as that is my Jon work administration time. Haven't sent a ranty one. I have been flabbergasted to get replies on the weekend.

I would expect to receive a reply within the next few working days.

Madness.

[loosechange]

Sorry, no Jon. One. Predictive text seems to be writing a novel.

[blaeberry]

I have had a complaint with our state primary and prefer email to telephone as I then have a paper trail and they can't deny something, I also summarise any face to face meetings and email this, However, these emails are with the head not the individual teacher. I normally write my emails in draft and ask my DH to comment on them then send the next day as being emotional or ranting just undermines the complaint.

I expect replies to my emails within a few working days, not immediately.

[AppleSetsSail]

I'm always bemused by any attempt to draw meaning from the time at which someone sends an email, as though there's some expectation that the recipient is standing at his computer hitting refresh.

I am generally reserved when it comes to emailing my kids' school. That said, I sent one grenade; I told the head not to expect my son for the next 1.5 weeks because I'd be teaching him the maths curriculum in advance of an 11+ exam. They didn't respond, and marked it 'excused'.

[Gobbolino6]

40 is a low number?!? What are people emailing about? Genuinely interested.

[LottieDoubtie]

Independent school- sample list...

-Child has drs/dentist/orthodontist/whatever appointment.
-Child is sick so won't be in.
-Child is still sick, panicking about exams can he have work sent home.
-Thanks for work sent home, but no Geography yet, could he have some? That's his biggest worry.
-Can child go on X trip he's lost the form?
-Permission for Child to go on Y trip (lost form)
-Permission for Child (boarder) to go into town at weekend
-Permission for Child (boarder) to go home with Z friend for Exeat.
-Could Child (boarder) not share with AB next term and they do not get along and worried that AB and child together is not a suitable mix for revision.
-Child needs to be off games next week he's hurt his ankle.


That's ten! And several of those could feasibly happen more than once over a 5 year period

Oh and one more for luck (my favourite)

-Child must miss first XI Rugby match on Saturday as it's Granny's 90th Birthday so I will be picking him up after prep please can you inform the head of rugby for me.