DP and I are on the verge of splitting up. we have a two year old dd and have been together 4 and half years.
He snooped at my phone a couple of weeks ago and saw a conversation I had with my sister. It was basically a link to an article about narcissists behaviour and explained why I haven't been able to be intimate with him for a while (the never apologise therefore never resolved part). I say snooped because my phone is in a flip case with a magnetic clasp and pass-coded. He claims it fell off the drawers and flipped open to the conversation with my sister.
HUGE back-story is that every time he's kissed me/cuddled me/said he loves me during the last few months it's made me cringe inside. Having spent the last few months mulling over this I realised it was down to the rows we've had where he called me a c&*t and another time where he just kept on and on at me for over an hour about something totally insignificant. Another time he shouted when our daughter was nursing. and another time he came right up to my face nose-to nose.
Following the snooping, which was while I was putting daughter to bed, He didn't tell me he'd seen it, he just went all uncommunicative and snippy and went to bed in the spare room. it was only when I told him the following day that I suspected what had happened that he owned up.
He has never apologised for any of the things he's done. He'll just wake up the following morning and act like it never happened and if I mention any of it I'm the one causing the problem. I just feel nothing ever gets resolved and I'm not allowed to express my hurt and unhappiness at his actions. During the last few months I've felt so lonely and unloved. We no longer have ANY physical intimacy, not even holding hands.
He's never had a high sex drive and I do wonder if the only reason he ever had sex with me was to produce our daughter (we're both early forties so was pretty much last-chance saloon). We've had sex only once every 3 or 4 months since dd was born and these were at my instigation.
Another thing he does is say something deliberately contentious then when I pull him up on it say that he was only joking and that I've no sense of humour. I've got a sense of humour if it's funny!
Currently we're at loggerheads. He says all our problems are of my making and I'm just desperately wanting him to be sorry.
I don't want to have to uproot dd and I hate the thought of not seeing her on dps weekends.
I'm just so lonely and at my wits end.
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Relationships
Should I just End this relationship?
HalloumiToastie · 13/12/2015 20:18
Thank God you got out! Can you change your no.? Does he know where you are?
You totally need to change your no. cos the more poisonous BS from him you read/hear, the more hold and influence he will have over you.
The latest crazy behaviour of his you described was just plain unhinged, scary and it was only a matter of time he hit you. The bloke sounds mental!!
PLease cease contact with this fucking psycho. Clearly the front he used when he was the man you fell in love with was just a guise to reel you in. What you´ve described on here, his most recent behaviour, THIS is his true colours!
They never start out as batshit psychos, obv they don´t! Or they´d never snare their victims would they? 
Wishing you strength and I hope you´re getting lots of support from your family and friends. I hope they all know the situation by now.
Have been a lurker for a while. So glad you are out and safe.
Good luck
I was worried for awhile reading your posts that you hadn't made it out. So relieved that you have. Still not clear if you're home or at relatives but please just stay away from him. So good you got police involved on 101, That creates a trail, a record. I guess you know now this is the end of the relationship, eh? You woke up and things can never stay the same when you do that 
Womb and OP of course this is the same guy. His post read as if he was trying to continue to abuse his wife via MN. OP you are being watched on here by your ghastly ex. Take care what you say. Good luck. Get lots and lots of protection in real life as he is abusing you. I would print off his posts and keep them for future use. He has admitted he was abusive but it was the fault of everyone but his. Take care Halloumi
So the guy yesterday eve wasn´t a Troll then??
No offence to the OP here but now I´m thinking if ¨she¨ is also a T or indeed the same ¨guy¨ from last night!
It´s a huge coincidence though.....
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