Hi, have posted about this before. I allowed dh back home after only a few days back in March, when I had asked him to leave temporarily while he got some help for his alcoholism. He claimed to be totally shocked, intended to change and went straight to AA. Stayed completely sober for 2 weeks then started to slip, and has been slipping more and more ever since. He hates AA, and has stopped going. He has not looked into any other kind of therapy, counselling, hypnosis, etc. but has got anti-d's from GP which he has been taking for a month, just increased the dose. They seemed to help at first but now he is just drinking on top.
I have been attending Al Anon for a year, have read Co-Dependent No More by Melody Beattie, learned a lot about alcoholism and talked to both recovering alcoholics and partners of active and recovering alcoholics, and I have really struggled with making 'detachment' work when I just will not tolerate him drinking around the dc or coming home drunk, even if not very drunk. I had given him leeway by saying, look I know stopping is hard, but just please stay away if you want a drink after work or something. (He commutes over an hour away)
He let us down again last night, and there were two empty wine bottles in his backpack. He swore he hadn't been drinking.
I have just told him not to come home tonight or this weekend, except to collect some stuff and go to his mum's, and if he gets some real help there may be one more chance, but that is it. If he comes home tonight I will go to a solicitor tomorrow. I hate the thought of it.
If I knew he would comply quietly, I would feel little but relief. I just know he his going to try to talk me round again with promises and pleading - that's the bit I am dreading.
Any support, also 'shares' from those in similar circumstances, would be gratefully received.
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Relationships
Just asked alcoholic dh to leave (again)...
halfcaff · 12/05/2011 15:17
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