Archers thread #158: Te Rum? You numpty, numpty, Tom! Empty tearoom follows. Christmas coming, farmers’ stand up, will it make us LOL? No! Discuss The Archers here.

[Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g]

Thank you, @PseudoBadger, for kicking off this long, long series of Archers threads.

All views on The Archers welcome here! New blood welcomed, and of course we are always delighted to welcome back former or occasional listeners/posters. We don't all agree on all points, although we do mostly try to be civil about it. Most of us are posting tongue in cheek a lot of the time, so don't worry about revealing that you think Tom Archer is a great businessman, or other unusual views.

Spoilers: not on this thread, please! We don't wait for the omnibus to discuss the weeknight episodes, but we do try our best to avoid cross-contamination from www.mumsnet.com/talk/radio_addicts/4636789-the-archers-spoilers-thread-7-cant-wait-for-702pm-join-us-here, where spoilers are positively welcomed!

For newer listeners, lurkers or those who just have no idea what we're talking about, @DadDadDad has created this useful thread: //www.mumsnet.com/Talk/radio_addicts/3557323-For-Archers-fans-a-guide-to-acronyms-on-the-long-running-discussion-threads-and-any-other-meta-thread-questions-you-may-have - BOOP point for him! (See thread for explanation.)

Thanks to @LillianGish for the title idea, which may plant an earworm if my scansion just about holds up. @BeatriceBatchelor wanted 'plebby coffee' inserted in reference to my Bolivian coffee anecdote on the last thread, so I'll mention it here instead. Here's hoping Fallon and Emma decamp to the charging station or Grey Gables, or both, to run the type of coffee shop/tearoom people actually enjoy spending time in. Tom's cauliflower eclairs and kale criossants approach sounds more likely to drive the casual trade away from the farm shop and cheese window as well as the Google Translate-named Te Rum.

Feeling very uninspired by TA at the moment, so I have nothing more to say for now. Over to you!

[harriethoyle]

Checking in!

[Bruisername]

Thanks - and good title. I’m sure we will have a bit more numpty tom!!

[EBearhug]

Checking in.

[LillianGish]

Thanks @Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g - brilliant scansion. Love it!

[EmmasBirthdayEarrings]

Thanks so much @gasp for keeping the show on the road!

Is the cafe still open while the place is being refurbished?

[TottersBlanklyIntoBimboCore]

Thanks @Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g! Brilliant as ever.

Pinch, punch! (I’m pinching Harry, until Ed is more financially stable, and punching Tom - obvs.)

[LillianGish]

My kids are bilingual - in neither language do they sound anything other than a native speaker (in English they get called "posh" because apparently my accent, which they also have, is "posh". It's not.) just picking up on your comment from the last thread @Brefugee to say your kids sound exactly like mine (it’s not particularly the accent which is posh, just their extensive vocabulary and tendency to use "posh" words which their peers might not).

[Voltefarce]

Checking in, thanks for the new thread.

[JayAlfredPrufrock]

Checking in.

Is it me or has nothing actually happened for ages?

[BoreOfWhabylon]

Thanks as always Gasp0de

[Fink]

@LillianGish

My kids are bilingual - in neither language do they sound anything other than a native speaker (in English they get called "posh" because apparently my accent, which they also have, is "posh". It's not.) just picking up on your comment from the last thread @Brefugee to say your kids sound exactly like mine (it’s not particularly the accent which is posh, just their extensive vocabulary and tendency to use "posh" words which their peers might not).

The other thing which makes bilingual kids (or people in general) sound posh is if they've only lived long-term in one of the countries/languages, and the other language is from parents, books, and holidays - but all their day-to-day interaction with other people their own age is in the other language. Their English (or whatever language it is) might be at native-speaker level, but they won't speak the same way as other children their age: they won't pick up the latest slang and ways of speaking that their peers have, they won't know which grammar 'rules' are routinely ignored in informal chat ... Which, as a shorthand, gets called posh. It might be that they don't have a solid grasp on a familiar/vulgar register at all, even though they're completely fluent in other registers (e.g. maybe they know the word 'fuck', but not how vulgar it is compared to other swear words in either language, which social groups would find it appropriate, which uses of it are more or less offensive etc. - because they only speak English with parents, or watch age-appropriate English-language media, where it doesn't come up), or it might be that their familiar register is dated because they use the slang that their parents use rather than what people their own age living in the UK would say. It's not the accent that's posh, it's the register.

[WitcheryDivine]

Brilliant title.

I'm trying to think what other mashups Tom might come up with. Sprouts would fit almost TOO well in a profiterole.

[Fartooold]

So..... Fallon goes into GG , taking her second hand furniture and ready to roll croissant pastry with her.
Ian throws a hissy fit and goes to work making artisanal pizzas at The Scandi Kitchen, and Joy joins his team to provide the cake and shoulder to cry on.
Probably more realistic than what we're listening to at the moment !

[Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g]

Some veg/bakery crossovers work very well. Carrot cake is probably the best known example, but beetroot can work well in a chocolate cake, beetroot powder can be used to create the red colour in a red velvet cake, I believe, and courgettes often pop up in cake recipes (probably devised in desperation to get rid of them at the end of the summer). Mashed parsnip was used during the war as a banana substitute. I will admit I'm struggling to see how any of the brassicas could be used in sweet baked goods, but I bet somebody's tried.

[Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g]

I forgot about pumpkins. I see potatoes also appear in gluten-free recipes. Fair enough, I can see how a bland starch would work. But this is one I won't be rushing to try out:

[Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g]

No words. I'd rather starve than try this. https://searchingforspice.com/cauliflower-chocolate-mousse/

[Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g]

There are many deranged people posting recipes on the internet.

https://www.yummly.co.uk/recipe/Kale-and-Orange-Cupcakes-with-Orange-Icing-2030199

https://www.yummly.co.uk/recipe/Brussels-Sprouts-Cake-Pops-9444682

https://trimazing.com/broccoli-for-dessert-chocolate-broccoli-cake/

[WitcheryDivine]

Oh no Gaspode please stop!!!! Feel quite nauseous at the cauliflower vomit pudding.

[MereDintofPandiculation]

@Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g

Some veg/bakery crossovers work very well. Carrot cake is probably the best known example, but beetroot can work well in a chocolate cake, beetroot powder can be used to create the red colour in a red velvet cake, I believe, and courgettes often pop up in cake recipes (probably devised in desperation to get rid of them at the end of the summer). Mashed parsnip was used during the war as a banana substitute. I will admit I'm struggling to see how any of the brassicas could be used in sweet baked goods, but I bet somebody's tried.

i was in a Portuguese B&B, and there were three home-made jams on the breakfast table - tomato, pumpkin and carrot

[Brefugee]

@LillianGish

My kids are bilingual - in neither language do they sound anything other than a native speaker (in English they get called "posh" because apparently my accent, which they also have, is "posh". It's not.) just picking up on your comment from the last thread @Brefugee to say your kids sound exactly like mine (it’s not particularly the accent which is posh, just their extensive vocabulary and tendency to use "posh" words which their peers might not).

well, i was recently visiting friends in UK, with others from the USA and individually at some point each of them said "but you know, you do sound posh" and tbh i know that i don't have an accent, and i know that i do speak more on the RP side of SSB so i probably do sound posh to a lot of people...

but I'm seriously not posh!

[Brefugee]

we have made really fantastic, moist, chocolaty brownies with beetroot in them. :)

As for the bilingual children: it's weird. My two have never ever lived in the UK. But they consider themselves British, like us, and culturally in particular are very british. And thanks to the internet they really don't have issues talking with their (northern English cities, complete with accents - one of which is the same as their fathers) cousins and my friends (London mostly, with a mix of Estuary English and MLE) children. It is a wonder to behold, tbh.

[iratepirate]

@JayAlfredPrufrock

Checking in.

Is it me or has nothing actually happened for ages?

Not just you.

[Minimammoth]

Where will all this food get cooked? Surely the show kitchen is being ripped out and the femme du jour kitchen being installed.
unless Linda is cooking.
ian is so flouncy, they won’t need a turkey for Christmas.

[WitcheryDivine]

Just realised I've conflated La Femme du Monde or whatever it's called with Les Soeurs Hereuse which I think was the one Jill protested about years ago. How many pretentious French named restaurants ARE there nearby?

[Bruisername]

Is it femme du monde or fin du monde?