So... tell me I'm doing the right thing leaving London, as I'm having a major wobble!

[sushistar]

Our house has just gone on the market. DH has got a job in the South West, near my mum and dad, lovly country town. We'll have a lot less money stress tere, better schools, near family to help with kids. But I've lived in london for over 10 yrs,. and the house going on the market has just made me feel all worried - are we doing the right thing???

Hiya Sushistar

You've done the right thing! We've just moved out of London (also to Sussex). I just know in my heart it's the right thing. We all feel so much calmer out of the hustle and bustle of London (could never imagine myself saying that pre-DS!) and it's great to see DS enjoying the open spaces.

I grew up in London, these are some of the reasons I think moving is a good thing:

As a child:
I was in the house a lot. I simply didn't have the freedom that my friends who lived in the countryside did. this is important to me for DS.

As a teen:
Where I grew up in London I was constantly hassled by men on the street - literally every time I set out of the door. This started as soon as I grew boobs (age 13), and carried on until I put on weight in my early 20s. Most were just of the "alright darling" type, but over the years there were many incidents involving deranged or nasty men which made me feel uncomfortable, or even afraid.
My (lovely, non-violent) male mates were often involved in violence on the streets, as young teens. Many of them were mugged. My non-white male mates got used to being harassed by the police. I was aware of crack dealers in the area from about the age of 14. I was propositioned by men looking for prostitutes who tried to talk me into it when I said I wasn't for sale.

None of this stuff seemed odd to me. I just accepted it as fairly normal because it was what I was used to. I didn't even tell my mum about most of it.

I know this stuff happens other places too, but certainly not as much in a small towns or villages!

And about making friends, you're two steps ahead. Firstly you're a mum, and so you have an excuse to talk to other strangers with kids too, and to join groups etc / meet mums at school (sorry I don't know how old your little ones are).

Secondly, don't underestimate the difference mumsnet can make! I started arranging to meet the local mumsnet meet-up group before we even moved down. It made the move seem much less scary - even though I've only met them a few times, they're a good bunch of people and I like knowing I can slope off and meet them every so often!

Megonthemoon -we'll be in Horsham. Although at the moment, sitting here surrounded by boxes it's hard to quite imagine it

Keep it coming! I DO feel better now...

Just had the first 2 viewings - seemed to go ok...

Megonthemoon - I've a feeling I could be in the same village as you! Is there a bookshop re-opening on the High Street?
I'm a newcomer too so would be good to meet (if indeed it is the same place!)

I was born and raised in London. I left to go to uni. I miss it not a jot. Not on tinsy wincy little bit.

This afternoon, I went out with a friend and sailed his wooden dinghy on a lake nearby (I am on on ML, so easy peasy, but when working I can do this after work).

We have had bbqs on the beach this year, at dinner time so my working friends and their children can join us. Men folk cooked burgers while the kids i bodyboarded.

How easy is that in London?

Although granted. watersports might not be your bag

we've done it and I can only reiterate what has been said:

calmer, slower pace of life
friendlier people
family life

we can get back to London easily - and dh commutes regularly for work. I love going back but I love coming home even more. I don't miss the anonymity or the hustle and bustle.

Good luck

pcwrold you are moving to Horsham not a little village in the outer hebrides!!! And we'll come if you invite us...

Kew - great! Come and see us!! We LOVE it here best move we could have ever made. Nipped to the coast today - took 25 mins!

tell when you are unpacked - we have some free time in August/Sept!