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Original poster

I did the thing you should never do…

58 replies

NotNowCantYouSeeImBusy · 01/05/2025 12:12

Went back on Rightmove whilst we’re in the middle of a purchase.

We had an offer accepted on a beautiful semi-detached house, top end of our budget, in the middle of March. Everything is proceeding as it should, as far as I know. Searches done, enquiries have just been sent. However, our survey flagged some fairly serious problems (damp, various rots, woodworm, chimney problems) which we’re waiting on costings for before we negotiate. It looked like a turnkey house when we viewed, but there’s actually a fair bit that needs doing.

We haven’t actually seen the house since we offered as we live so far away (looking to move for work) and it all feels very distant, and a massive commitment for something with issues. It would be a massive commitment if it didn’t have issues!

I was worried the cost to fix everything will break our budget, so I went back on Rightmove. There’s a beautiful house just come on for less, but detached and seemingly has a lot more going for it, but in a slightly less nice road. It was stupid of me to look because now I want that one.

I know it’s not daft to pull out of a sale because of a survey, and it’s a lot of money we’d be spending so I need to be sure, but I do feel like an idiot. If we go and see this other house and love it, we’d be right back at the beginning again and it’s a fucking awful process. And what’s to say this other house won’t need all the million hidden fixes needed?

Thanks for reading. This whole house buying thing is a proper headfuck. The idea of starting everything again from scratch is awful.

Has anyone had anything similar happen?

OP posts:
Original poster
NotNowCantYouSeeImBusy · 01/05/2025 14:27

Thanks so much everyone, lots of good advice and understanding. Those of you that have been there, I’m glad it worked out for you!

With the one we’re buying, the issues are pretty scary. I agree, the current owners have lived there happily and it’s been fine. But on the other hand it’s top of my budget and if they don’t want to come down, the cost of getting it sorted will most likely push it over. Plus there’s the faffing.

I’ve phoned the estate agent and got a viewing at the weekend 😬

OP posts:
allthemiddlechildrenoftheworld · 01/05/2025 14:58

@NotNowCantYouSeeImBusy sorry but I would not touch this with a barge pole!! it is going to be a millstone round your neck for years! I would be pulling out of the sale if I was you!

Twiglets1 · 01/05/2025 15:43

I had something similar happen. Went to view the other house, feeling guilty.

We fell in love with it immediately and withdrew from the other purchase. Never regretted it & it’s our home now, but still do feel a bit guilty about letting the other Sellers down.

House buying is a dirty game and you have to do what is right for you ultimately.

INeedAnotherName · 01/05/2025 15:47

I would go and view based on the survey on the other one.

various rots, woodworm,
^ That would have me running away screaming. I wouldn't have negotiated at all but maybe you are made of harder stuff than me.

Olsen · 01/05/2025 17:25

I’d go and see it. A friend has just pulled out of a bad survey purchase in a chain that has taken a long time. Sometimes best to cut your losses and move on.

MaryGreenhill · 01/05/2025 17:26

Go for it OP

Lookingtomakechanges · 01/05/2025 17:43

Ooh dear. If there's any idiotic behaviour, it's buying a house you haven't seen. You can't possibly tell what condition a house is in except by visiting it (the photos are hardly going to highlight the damp patches or cracks), or what the neighbourhood is like without hanging around at different times of day. It could be horribly noisy or have a fly tipping problem.
I'd take this worrying survey is as a sign that you've made a mistake and book a couple of nights in the area to view this new house and any others that look interesting. Good luck.

Original poster
NotNowCantYouSeeImBusy · 01/05/2025 18:00

INeedAnotherName · 01/05/2025 15:47

I would go and view based on the survey on the other one.

various rots, woodworm,
^ That would have me running away screaming. I wouldn't have negotiated at all but maybe you are made of harder stuff than me.

😁 that’s the thing, I’m not made from stern stuff at all and had to be talked down a bit after the survey results. I’m still worried it’ll be one thing after the other and one job will spark off a thousand others. I think I’d accepted that, because everything else is so nice, even though we really didn’t want anything that needed major work. We viewed it twice before we put the offer in and had a good chat with the owners (to the point I feel a bit sick at the thought of letting them down if we like this other one).

OP posts:
mackerella · 01/05/2025 18:07

Lookingtomakechanges · 01/05/2025 17:43

Ooh dear. If there's any idiotic behaviour, it's buying a house you haven't seen. You can't possibly tell what condition a house is in except by visiting it (the photos are hardly going to highlight the damp patches or cracks), or what the neighbourhood is like without hanging around at different times of day. It could be horribly noisy or have a fly tipping problem.
I'd take this worrying survey is as a sign that you've made a mistake and book a couple of nights in the area to view this new house and any others that look interesting. Good luck.

They have seen it - she said so in the first post Confused They just haven't seen it again, since that first viewing and offer.

Doris86 · 01/05/2025 18:49

NotNowCantYouSeeImBusy · 01/05/2025 18:00

😁 that’s the thing, I’m not made from stern stuff at all and had to be talked down a bit after the survey results. I’m still worried it’ll be one thing after the other and one job will spark off a thousand others. I think I’d accepted that, because everything else is so nice, even though we really didn’t want anything that needed major work. We viewed it twice before we put the offer in and had a good chat with the owners (to the point I feel a bit sick at the thought of letting them down if we like this other one).

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Better feeling sick for a few days about letting the owners down, than feeling sick for years regretting not buying the other house.

librathroughandthrough · 01/05/2025 19:04

Don’t buy a house at the top end of your budget that needs extensive repairs.

Chewygummy · 02/05/2025 18:23

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Trytosmilefor2025 · 02/05/2025 18:58

A house is a massive purchase and a huge commitment. You need to be comfortable with your decision to buy. We had a similar experience where we offered on a house that had lots of hidden problems and ended up pulling out of the sale. These things happen so don't feel guilty if you like the other house and have to pull out (and you have a good reason I think).

Original poster
NotNowCantYouSeeImBusy · 02/05/2025 19:06

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The sales history isn’t on Rightmove so that means it’s longer ago than 1995 that it last sold, I gather. So a fair amount of time!

OP posts:
Chewygummy · 02/05/2025 19:12

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FancyCatSlave · 02/05/2025 19:16

Arrange to see them both on same day, the one you are buying and the new one. Trust your gut on which is best.

I always go for location, you can always do up a house but you can’t move it. The better road would always get my vote. But you need to see it.

Livingthebestlife · 02/05/2025 19:26

House buying is a nightmare but very important to get it right and what you want

For me I always say area rather than house, you can make a house how you want over time but you can't change the area.

However the issues you list are very serious and we dealt with damp and never again will I go through that ordeal again, you will need to add on more money because what you're quoted is never enough, always other issues are found or the current issue is more serious. Double the time frame for fixing.

I'd look at every house I liked, I wouldn't care as it's big money you're spending. Get the best professionals to check everything and who are honest with cost and time.

Good luck with it all and definitely put your patience pants on. 😀

Original poster
NotNowCantYouSeeImBusy · 02/05/2025 19:44

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🤣 no that’s not me but I know the thread you mean!

OP posts:
Original poster
NotNowCantYouSeeImBusy · 02/05/2025 19:53

Livingthebestlife · 02/05/2025 19:26

House buying is a nightmare but very important to get it right and what you want

For me I always say area rather than house, you can make a house how you want over time but you can't change the area.

However the issues you list are very serious and we dealt with damp and never again will I go through that ordeal again, you will need to add on more money because what you're quoted is never enough, always other issues are found or the current issue is more serious. Double the time frame for fixing.

I'd look at every house I liked, I wouldn't care as it's big money you're spending. Get the best professionals to check everything and who are honest with cost and time.

Good luck with it all and definitely put your patience pants on. 😀

Patience pants 😁 definitely need some. It’s not my strong point.

Thanks for the first hand damp experience. Do you mind me asking how you solved it? We’ve had a couple of people look, and one has said an injectable damp proof course, but reading around I’ve seen some people say that those make things worse! So I don’t know who to believe about what any more.

OP posts:
Frostynoman · 02/05/2025 20:07

Woodworm is there due to wet wood (the damp). DPCs are useless and many damp specialists just peddle their own products and make the issue worse. The house has to breathe (such as using original methods like lime instead of cement and plastic paints etc.) - what bothered me was alluding to different types of rot. If there is any dry rot then walk away. It’s not worth the headache unless you are 100% wed to the property and have deep pockets.

Area popularity changes. Detached houses are always desirable so fingers crossed for the weekend viewing.

Blueskies25 · 02/05/2025 20:27

NotNowCantYouSeeImBusy · 02/05/2025 19:53

Patience pants 😁 definitely need some. It’s not my strong point.

Thanks for the first hand damp experience. Do you mind me asking how you solved it? We’ve had a couple of people look, and one has said an injectable damp proof course, but reading around I’ve seen some people say that those make things worse! So I don’t know who to believe about what any more.

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Speak to an Architect and they will advise on the best course of action

leavemealonee · 02/05/2025 20:32

We were in the middle of buying a house and saw another one 2 doors down the street for sale. Went in, but inside it wasn’t what we wanted at all, so proceeded with the first house. The family of a second house decided to stay, so now we are neighbours (they showed us round!), but I have no qualms about it and always stop to chat as if nothing happened.

Original poster
NotNowCantYouSeeImBusy · 02/05/2025 20:32

Frostynoman · 02/05/2025 20:07

Woodworm is there due to wet wood (the damp). DPCs are useless and many damp specialists just peddle their own products and make the issue worse. The house has to breathe (such as using original methods like lime instead of cement and plastic paints etc.) - what bothered me was alluding to different types of rot. If there is any dry rot then walk away. It’s not worth the headache unless you are 100% wed to the property and have deep pockets.

Area popularity changes. Detached houses are always desirable so fingers crossed for the weekend viewing.

Can I ask why dry rot would put you off more than wet, @Frostynoman? I need to research my rots more.

OP posts:
Frostynoman · 02/05/2025 20:41

It is incredibly serious and you need to get to it early and cut out more wood than looks rotten to ensure it is okay. The works can be expansive (and expensive).

Obvs look at places better than Wiki but have a glance at it

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dry_rot

You could be talking joist ends and roofing timbers ( that’s floors and ceilings ripped up and replaced)

Dry rot - Wikipedia

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dry_rot

INeedAnotherName · 02/05/2025 20:48

I "think" dry rot starts inside the wood so you don't really notice it until the structure is dust inside, plus it spreads under the surface. Wet rot starts on the outside due to damp or direct water contact such as a slipped tile, and more likely to be visible before a lot of damage is done.

Woodworm spreads easily unless thoroughly treated in every nook and cranny. I once accidentally bought a beautiful second hand piece of furniture with it in and everyone advised me to just burn it and not bother treating. You only need to miss one and it's game over.

Don't buy a house because you feel guilty about letting someone down. A bad house can ruin you.