Fantasise with me… about villages

[Lavenderfarmcottage]

I am a single Mum with a child aged 8. We live in Australia and my child doesn’t love seeing his Dad that much - it’s a chore and that’s a whole other story. We also have very little family here on my side at all. I feel quite isolated & have had tragic things happen beee.

I often dream of moving to Europe or the UK. I love the English countryside and the first village I ever saw near Bath made me want to cry it was so beautiful.

My secret dream is to move there when my son is 13 and starting secondary.

I have an EU and Aussie passport. I could afford a home that was around 450,000 pounds.

I would want to send my child to a good school.

We would want to live somewhere with kayaking, good walks and friendly people etc.

Is this dream possible ?

You have no idea how validating this is. I was sure agents did this in my affluent country town did this and felt gas lit for saying. They essentially control the market here and get their friends in first. Also about single Mums and judgments- it’s not everywhere but I really felt it in my conservative town - in Australia you’d be gas lit and told that it’s your own insecurity. The English are a bit elitist but at least they’re aware of it and there’s a clear rule book & places to go to avoid it.

We've viewed so many houses and spoken extensively with one of the estate agents, who even admitted to showing a property to his friend, a property developer before anyone else. A friend of ours, who lives in the village we're trying to move to, had to write a letter to his sellers highlighting his character and lifelong connection to the area. We're looking at countryside villages near Sheffield, South Yorkshire. While they're not necessarily biased against single mums, they tend to prefer selling to locals they know and are resistant to "townies" buying properties. Being in our mid-30s with a baby, we feel they're less keen on buyers like us and seem to favor elderly couples instead. Whenever we go to look at property
neighbours will be out doing their gardens watching who goes to look around it even if it's -1 outside ... It's annoying but we are doing it for our son and know it will be worth it, I hope it works out for you too!

I moved to a village not long before secondary school.

It was hell!

-being an outsider
-bullying
-school work far behind what I'd been used to
-education just for farmers, not for those wanting uni

• having to be driven everywhere

-nearest friend 20 min drive away

• not seeing friends outside of school

-very long commute to school

• having to travel 40 miles to shops to buy clothes, toiletries you can't get in local chemist/ supermarket
• didn't go to the cinema/theatre for years
• almost 100% white British and Christian
• no takeaway shops, so no curry/Chinese for years
• had to have huge chest freezer in case we got snowed in

-only shopped once a week

• no gas central heating
• old houses cold & draughty
• difficult to learn accent
• no bookshops
• poor phone signal
• need to learn to drive asap then danger of roads
• everyone's related
• gossipy
• ambition frowned upon
• being watched everywhere
• lack of safe pavements to walk on
• inaccessible farmland, no country parks for nice walks
• lack of competition means local prices are higher
• no nearby hairdresser
• kids are fatter as they are driven everywhere
• terrible bus services
• often no subject teachers so poor quality education
• bad tourist driving/parking
• air b&bs taking up houses do little stable population
• long cold winters
• no shopping centres to hide from the rain in
• the smell of manure in the fields
• farms are noisy!

We live in a beautiful rural village, a shop, a school, 2 pubs, beautiful countryside and a lovely community, I’d say I am in first name terms with 90% of residents. It was amazing for my children when they were in primary school, especially once old enough to play out unsupervised, the village green is surrounded by houses mostly occupied by older generations of my children’s friends, it always felt very safe and I had no worries. My girls are now late teens and they hate living here. Public transport is terrible, there’s nothing for them to do locally. We have a small market town 5 miles away, biggest nearest city 30 miles away, getting to college involves me driving them to local town then an hours bus ride. As adults we are very happy hear but my girls will be off somewhere more fun as soon as they are able. I certainly wouldn’t move to a village with a teen from the other side of the world

I was going to suggest the same - we are a friendly bunch here! Lots of lakes around for kayaking too, plus lots of beautiful walks on the wolds and beaches.