How do people save a mortgage deposit?

[Bananapuppy]

Exactly that- any advice welcome please!
Three children and associated childcare costs, renting, two incomes but at the lower end of the salary scale (£27K & £20K). We just don’t seem to have any money to save and we’re desperate to buy our own home.
All the very helpful advice online suggests not drinking (we don’t), not going on holiday (again, we don’t), not having an expensive car (you get the picture…). Basically, a whole range of cuts to luxuries which are out of our means anyway.
Any tips on real-life savings/ mortgage planning would be so gratefully received.

I will just add, in anticipation of the comments, that this isn’t simply a case of hideously bad life planning. I met my exH at 16 and spent 10 years in an awfully abusive relationship.
I left at 26 with nothing, but now 4 years on have a lovely DP, secure job, and am trying to get my life in order. Buying a house is the next sensible (yet seemingly out of reach) step.

The amount you need is not so bad if you split it into monthly amounts ie £600 per month extra for 2 years would give you roughly what you need to save.

Could you save a proportion eg £100 from salary, and one of you get an additional job or freelance weekend work to make up the remainder? Put it away in an untouchable account.
Anything will help, look at your skills and find something you can offer to do freelance, bookeeping/dogwalking/proofreading/tutoring etc..
The longer term focus should be on a higher income but you are already doing that .....

You can do this OP!

What does your DH do? Is there any 'side hustle' he can do at weekends short term? Helping build pre pack furniture? Garden clearance? General handy man things?

Go through house with fine tooth comb and sell stuff you no longer need. It's time consuming but if you could scramble £50 from some old toys / bikes / scooters then every little helps!

Meal plan for your life! What cheap nutritious meals can you do? Jacket potato and beans is a decent balanced meal that I'm sure could feed your whole family for £2-3 max. Bulk up dinners with frozen veg so there's no waste.

Carefully planned free events with the kids. Not sure where you live but museums / park picnic / forest walks / craft days / rice crispy cake making etc are all cheap ways to fill up weekends.

Scour charity shops for children's gifts. Might be a little trickier as they get older and the requests roll in but I've got so much for my LO from charity shops for Christmas abs birthdays but it took planning and looking often and doing so consistently throughout the year.

Cut down on any subscriptions you don't 'need' such as sky / check phone bills / Netflix etc.

Whilst your workload is high at the moment, as it tapers off could you consider swapping your study hours for some tutoring for teens looking to go into a similar career / training path?

'Pay yourself first' make a detailed list of outgoings and carve out what you can in terms of savings and plug that straight into a savings account on day one so it doesn't get eaten up during the month.

Make a rather boring pact if you haven't already that you and DH do no presents for eachother for Christmas or birthday. You can still mark the occasion by being treated to a lie in / dinner cooked / few hours alone whilst he takes kids out / a nice walk / sweets and a film at home.

@mullmaraand @AllTheUsernamesAreAlreadyTaken

Re your points about young people, and it being about what your parents did and not being able to afford the basics (housing) when you work full time.

I do think about the social impact of this on the future. Both in terms of masiive social devide and potential unrest.

But also of we have a huge population renting into olda age how will that work financially? I feel for many people retirement only works because you're no longer paying for housing costs. Especially with the state of pensions right now. How will people who are stuck in private renting retire?

I think it's an area I'm interested in, so think about it more, but honestly think it's a huge brewing social issue.

I’m another one suggesting shared ownership - would that work for you? It was the only way I could buy somewhere, I needed a 5% deposit of an overall 40% share of the property, and even if it’s now 10-15% deposit of your share it’s much more achievable and I bought in a lovely area.

The disparity between those that can and those that can’t buy is just so depressing, and I feel like it will only get worse and worse. I’m 40 and have just been able to buy a flat on the open market finally. I have friends who, with the help of parents, bought places at 30, have paid off a huge chunk of their mortgage by now and seen their house almost double in value since then. The difference between our respective positions is now hundreds of thousands of pounds, which is staggering.

Yaykyay
Genuinely no hate on you. But we can't honestly say we live in any kind of equal society when people can have this happen.

Not saying this poster said this. Just an example.

Also the people who make the laws on this and decisions on housing policy area mainly all the type who had their deposit gifted. So Iwam it doesn't take a genius to realise policy won't reflect actual need.

Agreed. We had a politician come out a few years ago here and basically say that young people should ask for the bank of mum and dad to help them out, instead of trying to fix the housing crisis.

The arrogant assumption being that most parents have tens of thousands to just hand over to their children. Some of these politicians are living on a different planet!

It's going to be tough for you, and unfortunately, I don't have any good advice other that what has already been suggested, but one thing you can do is encourage your kids to save early (when old enough obviously!) so that they don't end up in the same position as you and repeat the cycle.

My parents never had any money or owned a house so I understood from a young age that I'd have to save. I got a part-time job at 16 and worked after school, weekends, school holidays etc. I had plenty of energy at that age so it never bothered me, I had lots of friends at work, and it enabled me to save the first 5k or so of my deposit before going to uni at 18. I then spent most of my 20s living in cheap house shares etc so that I could save most of my salary. I'd hate it now, but it didn't bother me at that age. I don't think I missed out on anything. I still went out at least once a week, bought clothes, had occasional holiday etc, but I was sensible as it was always in the back of my mind that I didn't have parents who could support me.

Kids should learn that a few sacrifices early on can change their future, and that saving even a small amount regularly can make a huge difference if they start early enough.

Does anyone follow cult of youth jewellery on Instagram. Her house buying 2021 highlight is a very sobering watch, as a single mum trying to buy in London. She works such long hours to try and save that she blacked out, hit her head on the sink and woke up the next morning caked in blood and had to do the school run.
I wish politicians would see stuff like this.