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Original poster

Experience of teenage girls bedroom in garden build?

63 replies

Putyourfeetup · 05/01/2015 22:19

We live in a lovely yet inner city Victorian street. We have four daughters in a 3 bed house and the eldest is fourteen. We are in desperate need for more living space (4 year old twins currently in 2nd reception room). Unable to afford a loft conversion, currently we are contemplating a build at the bottom of our small garden to create a bedroom/hangout for eldest with storage space. The twins could then move into her room thus freeing up much needed communal living space downstairs at relatively low cost. DH is concerned for daughters safety saying he wouldn't be so concerned if it was for a boy. His concerns mainly lie in 'weirdos' figuring out she is in there and trying to get in. It is however an enclosed square of gardens and only overlooked by a few houses. Also we are aware of building regs and that such spaces should only be used for occasional use. Just wanted to gauge what people think about the safety/appropriateness/pitfalls of a teenage girl living in a space a short distance from the house. If you have any experience of it even better...trying to figure out if it is a realistic plan...thanks x

OP posts:

Somethingtodo · 06/01/2015 13:40

*keep

PrimalLass · 06/01/2015 16:16

There is zero chance I would isolate a 14 year old from the family by having her sleep at the end of the garden.

Surely you'd be better to just move?

PrimalLass · 06/01/2015 16:17

Build a conservatory for living space?

IssyStark · 06/01/2015 16:28

When i first read your question yesterday, my initial thought was 'what about the planning permission?', let alone the isolation. You can't simply build insulated sheds and have people sleep there. Councils take people to court over this and that would cost you far, far more.

If it is living space you need, then make that by building a conservatory onto the back of your house or making the insulated shed into a playroom with all the toys and the youngest three share, rather than breaking planning laws.

SoupDragon · 06/01/2015 16:34

How would you like to sleep at the end of the garden?
How would you like to have to walk down the garden in all weathers to go to bed?

SoupDragon · 06/01/2015 16:37

we are aware of building regs and that such spaces should only be used for occasional use.

And yet you are still considering it...?

aged 9 and 14 they are utterly incompatible room sharers!

At 9 and 14 they should be able to understand that they have to share and make the best of it.

Bowlersarm · 06/01/2015 16:37

I think at 14 she still needs to be in the family house, with the rest of her family.

Maybe when she's older it may be ok.

Edenviolet · 06/01/2015 16:48

Surely it would be easier to just have a single storey extension to the back of the house and have a downstairs bedroom there?

ilovechristmas1 · 06/01/2015 18:45

op i was thinking of doing this for my 15yr old son

we already have a shed/summer house and are thinking of boarding out/insulate for the summer autumn months

reading with interest

also if the council is so hot on this "sheds for beds" especially in london why arent there loads of prosecutions going on,its well known some london boroughs are teeming with them

Original poster

Putyourfeetup · 06/01/2015 19:22

To be honest soupdragon I would rather like to have a den at the bottom of the garden to call my own whatever the weather though I appreciate that wouldn't be to everyone's tastes.
Thank you all for all your input. Aside from the moral judgements (anyone would think we were thinking about throwing her into a Siberian workcamp by some of the comments) you have provided food for thought. Some of which are genuinely insightful and helpful. Due to the configuration of the house and our finances there are not many options avaliable to us so we are just trying to muddle our way through. House prices have gone potty locally and bigger houses are rare though we are keeping our eyes peeled. I too knew friends in my youth who lived in caravans etc on their parents property quite happily and safely and still remained an integral part of family life. Quite the opposite of feeling pushed out they valued their independence and space and were no less a part of family life. In fact they spent more time at their homes than out and about and all the socialising went on there - with their families often included as a result - which is why it came up for us as an idea. I think you're right shabbycabby I think it does go on far more than people would admit. And of course if she was poorly and needed to be close at hand she would stay in the house. It is a given that our daughters health happiness and safety is of prime importance. As mums I'm sure you would agree? A bigger concern would probably the legalities and loss of money which would follow if anyone reported us - although from what I know of our neighbourhood this would be less likely than in other areas though I know it could still be a possibility. I wonder how many of you would report a family who's daughter was living at the bottom of the garden?! Anyway thanks again. I have been duly put off but will consider it further. As a newbie to mumsnet I'm impressed by the response and now have a fairly good idea as to the general demographic.

OP posts:

PrimalLass · 07/01/2015 08:17

Well that's a bit rude.

MythicalKings · 07/01/2015 08:23

A bigger concern would probably the legalities and loss of money which would follow if anyone reported us - although from what I know of our neighbourhood this would be less likely than in other areas though I know it could still be a possibility. I wonder how many of you would report a family who's daughter was living at the bottom of the garden?!

I would in the blink of an eye. Out of concern for her safety. I have lovely neighbours and we all get on well but I wouldn't hesitate.

iwantgin · 07/01/2015 08:24

We have recently converted some old buildings at the bottom of our garden into an office space.

It's v nice - all insulated, has electric, water and double glazed windows, doors etc.

However it is cold. DH has to set the heater to come on an hour before he goes to 'work'.

We have put a sofa bed down there - in case the DSs (older teens) want to use it as a hang out, have friends over. So far no one has wanted to sleep down there ;) (there isn't a toilet, so would have to come into the house for that).

Is there no way to add on to the back of the house ? Conservatory, summer room? That way there will be an extra living room so all could spread out some how?

Artandco · 07/01/2015 08:29

9 and 14 year olds. Of course they can share. Tell them once they earn enough money to rent own flat they can have own bedroom.

Build a space at bottom of garden as playroom/ den so they can use when friends over etc as private space

LineRunner · 07/01/2015 08:37

DP and his mate have just built one of these from scratch - an insulated three bedroom cabin in the mate's garden. The total cost of materials came in at well under two grand.

LineRunner · 07/01/2015 08:38

I think the issue about building it directly onto the house, or free standing, is the necessary ground preparation works. Free standing is so much easier.

OddBoots · 07/01/2015 08:48

A bigger concern would probably the legalities and loss of money which would follow if anyone reported us

It may not just be money you would lose if you were reported for having a child sleep in an unsuitable place.

LineRunner · 07/01/2015 09:04

Even if you only use such a cabin for very occasional sleepovers, they need to be fire resistant and hooked up to smoke alarms btw.

wowfudge · 07/01/2015 09:36

I can envisage a posting in AIBU: 'Neighbours' daughter sleeping in garden shed; WIBU to report them to social services?'. Pretty snotty answer from the OP who did, after all, canvass opinion. Don't forget insurance OP - you might invalidate it if someone in sleeping in your garden room.

radiobedhead · 07/01/2015 09:40

The costs you might be asked to pay to demolish it (take down, removal, plus any court fees and fines) plus the amount spent purchasing may come to more than the loft extension.

LineRunner - you are definitely not allowed a three bed home in the garden without permission ! Two grand won't seem cheap once they pay costs and a fine when asked to tear it down.

LineRunner · 07/01/2015 09:48

radio Slight typo there! I meant three rooms. No-one's permanently living in it! It's more of a big tree house without the tree.

Mate is nevertheless making it as fire retardant as possible though, as undoubtedly it will be used as overspill accommodation during family visits at some point, and/or for garden parties and storage.

I just thought the relatively low cost if you can do it yourself is interesting.

RiverTam · 07/01/2015 09:49

you move or they learn to share, as children have done for years and years and years. It's against building regs anyway, so why even bother contemplating it?

Floggingmolly · 07/01/2015 09:53

You cannot put your daughter in a shed in the garden . Muddle along as best you can while you say for a loft conversion. Or move.
Why are you only starting to deal with this now??

Floggingmolly · 07/01/2015 09:53

save

Floggingmolly · 07/01/2015 09:58

Btw, 14 year old's won't necessarily "value their independence and space" by living in the garden outside the family home...
Why on earth didn't you see this coming when you had twins?

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