Collecting sick children from school - expectations

[2ndSopranosRule]

I had a call from breakfast club to tell me dd2 had been sick and can someone get her as soon as possible (clearly!). I'm 10 miles away - at work - and my dh who works 15 miles from school was in the car so he turned round to get her (I'll take tomorrow off before anyone asks!).

I had to get dd1 last week too.

On both occasions school have bristled for want of a better word when I've told them it'd be at least half an hour. Neither of us have a particularly huge commute but by the time we've told managers, rearranged the day etc. time will march on. It's never been a case of "no, we are at work and won't leave", we just can't teleport ourselves!

My parents live near school but dm isn't in the best of health and df is in his late 80s: I really don't want them dealing with a vomiting child. MIL lives 10 miles in the other direction and although she's always willing, it'd take her just as long. Besides which, she and SIL share a car and if SIL's using it she'd be looking at 2 hours on public transport.

I'm curious to know if the school thinks we're bad parents for not having anyone very local to pick up in instances like this. We're trying our best.

[bibbitybobbityyhat]

Clam, I don't think a single person on here has suggested schools should provide medical care, all they ask is that school doesn't get arsey when you aren't able to appear instantly to take your child home.

[clam]

There have been numerous previous threads where posters have done so, however, which is what I was alluding to.

[bibbitybobbityyhat]

How helpful is it to allude to previous threads, I wonder.

[clam]

Because it could be relevant here. Some schools might be perceived as being twitchy about parents taking a while to collect ill children because they have had experience of people complaining (and there have been threads confirming this) that those children have "been made to sit on hard chairs in a draughty corridor" whilst waiting.

[bibbitybobbityyhat]

Yes, well that's miserable for sick children isn't it? It would be nice if all schools had a proper sick room where children could wait in comfort for an hour or two. I doubt anyone complaining was blaming an individual for the lack of facilities, so no need to be touchy about it.

[clam]

"Yes, well that's miserable for sick children isn't it?"

Exactly, which is why as a parent, I would make jolly sure I had something in place to minimise that misery as much as possible, if I knew my husband or I were unlikely to be able to get there quickly.

Touchy with good reason, actually. So many people look to blame schools for everything nowadays.

[OffRoader]

We do this because we are concerned and worried about your child!

They are ill and crying for you. Believe it or not we care about your child and want them to get to the docs/home to bed as soon as possible.

I've felt pissed off on behalf of a child in my care many a time, some days I hide it better than others.

[pourmeanotherglass]

30 mins isn't bad. When mine were at primary, I could have got there on my bike in 20 mins, but would have needed another 10 to hand over at work. I don't imagine many people could get there much quicker than that.
It hasn't happened at secondary yet, but that will be trickier, as the school is 30 mins walk from home, so if they are too ill to walk I would need to pick them up by car, and I never have my car at work, so would need to remember whether DH took it to work or not and then pick it up. Could easily take an hour.

[clam]

If a parent is OK with their child waiting for them for a possibly lengthy period of time in what might well be a relatively inhospitable environment (e.g. outside the office on a hard chair with a sick bucket nearby) then that's kind of up to them. The vast majority of state primary schools do not, however, have sick bays nowadays.

In the OP's case, it sounds to me as though it was because it was the breakfast club that there was potentially more of an issue, as it was presumably about to close.

[bibbitybobbityyhat]

But parents don't want their children to have to wait in an inhospitable place, they usually don't have a choice about it! I imagine there might be a miniscule number of irresponsible parents who don't rush to pick up their sick child. Surely the vast majority (just like op) get there as soon as they possible can?

I was more or less a full time sahm or working from home when my children were at primary school but I was out shopping with a friend in the middle of London when she got a call about one of her children. It takes 1 hour to get from there to school ... there was absolutely nothing she could do about it. If one of the staff had said to her "that long, can't you get here sooner?" I fully expect she would have given them a mouthful!

[Yokohamajojo]

Well if you don't have an Au-Pair, child minder, parents in the same city what choice do we have? I surely can't ask my elderly neighbours or other parents with small children to pick up a sick child can I? I am lucky to only have 30 mins to get to school and in an office where I could up and leave within 5mins if need be. Also lucky to not have had many bugs with the children and a very nice school secretary that doesn't get annoyed or doesn't show it at least. I just don't know what parents who work away could do differently?