10 yr old started period today.. questions..

[dol89]

Hi, my daughter turnt 10 literally 6 days ago. She came home from school today and told me she had blood when she wiped.. when we got home I confirmed she started her period.
I am absolutely distraught, she is so little. She's my first and only baby and I've never had to do this before so I have a few questions for parents with children that have recently gone through this.
It's been a long time since I started so I can't remember.

Will this be a proper period?
Will it ease in slowly?
Will she have a period every month now or will it go and come back later on?

Anything else you think would help would be appreciated, I'm so upset 😭

I started at 11 and was regular as clockwork from day one.

I would tell the school just in case she needs to change part way through a lesson.

Get in painkillers and a hot water bottle. Hopefully she won't need them but it is good to be prepared.

One thing I would do is if she is regular then plan holidays / trips around it. It's not much fun being on holiday in spain and unable to use the pool.

Not sure if primary schools have towel bins in the loos now?

Mine did and that was almost 40 years ago.

10 is within the normal age range OP, I feel like this is a you problem really. You should celebrate, it's a milestone!

As others have said, periods initially can be sporadic in timing and duration so just teach her to always be prepared.

I feel that OP is being unnecessarily jumped on by some. It’s perfectly natural to feel a bit sad about a primary aged girl starting her period, no matter how natural it might be.

@dol89 I hope your DD is ok and isn’t in too much discomfort. It’s normal to feel upset about her starting - they have a lot of years of dealing with “grown up” stuff ahead of them without having to deal with starting their period young too.

Personally, I would mention it to her class teacher. I started mine at 9 and there were no sanitary bins in our school toilets so I had to use a teacher toilet which was in another part of the school.

It's a normal part of growing up and 10 isnr really in the massively unusual range. It's not normal that you're " distraught". I can see why it might come as a bit of a shock and make you a little bit sad, it's a sign your little girl is becoming a woman, but try not to show your negativity to her. Her periods might be sporadic or they might be regular. The poster upthread who said that periods can't be regular till 14/15 is wrong. I started at 11 and from then on they were like clockwork every 27/28 days.

Also think the op is being jumped on. I’d be upset too. These are adult things to deal with and periods can cause a lot of pain. The later it’s put off the better. Mine were horrific when I was a teen, diarrhoea and vomiting, had to come home from school in on several occasions.

I was secretly upset too and my dd was twelve. I think it's because you know what an inconvenience it is and you don't want them to have to deal with it. One of mine does a lot of sport she hates it when she has to think about pads. The other gets really bad pains.Nobody wants that for their child.

Please can you tell me the details of which you use. My DD is autistic and has a lot of sensory difficulties, so I'm a bit worried about how she will cope once hers starts. Period pants weren't a thing in my day

My dd started a week after turning 10. I told the school in case she needed help. She struggled to manage pads (didn’t want to change them at school) so we found period pants were the solution. If her flow is heavy she can wear a pad on top and dispose of it at lunchtime. School should have sanitary bins in toilets. If painful she can overlap ibuprofen and paracetamol of course.

Period pants are really widely available now@RosieCosy. When I got my dd some just before covid they were a bit more of a specialist item. I got them online at ModiBodi.

Now you can get them in primark and M&S. probably loads of other places too!

Fine to feel a tinge of sadness that your baby is growing up but if you are genuinely distraught please get help because this isn't normal emotions. Unfortunately people less and less seem to be able to cope with normal life, talk to a professional about managing feelings, do not let onto your dd.

10 is on the earlier side but far from rare, it can also be months or years before full periods start, lots of variation (my DD was 2 years of discharge, not a lot before it really kicked in)

DD was 10.5. I did let her teacher know. She wasn’t the first in the class to have started.

Got her period pants and reusable pads and she hasn’t looked back.

(We aren’t sure how tall she will be having started early. She’s currently 5’ 4” at 13 and hasn’t grown since last summer. Not sure if there will be another growth spurt or if this is it.)

Please do not let her see you be upset, it’s a normal part of life and 10 is common. I would tell the school. See if period pants might be a good option, especially if she’s worried about bleeding unexpectedly

Her face the second month when she looked up at me and asked “every month???” was the bit that broke me. 😢

My DD had her first period when 10.5. That was 6 months ago. She hasn't had another since.

We made it a celebration of her becoming a young woman.

She's now a bit annoyed she hasn't had another one yet.

This. My sister was nine when she had her first period, in 1981, and because no one had explained anything to her, she was terrified — and I doubt my mother, who didn’t even having a language for periods, was much help, because she regarded periods as horrifying and shameful. Very important not to pass on your own feelings about a normal aspect of puberty to a child.

Please inform school. I used to volunteer in a primary, the TAs were 95% female and anyone feeling shit from their period could come out of class and we would often give them a drink of water and sneak them a biscuit.

It was a 90 children year group and there would always be 1 or 2 girls who would start their period in year 4, there were sanitary bins in the toilet in year 4 upwards and a stash of sanitary towels in SLT office where everyone had access ie teachers/TAs so we could always get them,

Period knickers were fantastic for young girls.

I have stocked up with some period pants from M&S for my DD as I think she will struggle with the feel of pads. I got size 6 and they look comfy and about the right size.

Sorry OP, you are perfectly entitled to feel emotional about your DD's early start. You don't have to explain yourself to those just coming on with disingenuous posts asking why.

I don't think OP sounds like your mother @PollySolo Her DD knew about periods already and OP has supported her.

for M+S boycotters I can recommend the CheekyWipes hotshots. Recently got her some sleep shorts too and they’re great.

@RosieCosy M and S they are soft and wash really well, come in packs of three. Usually go for a size 6/8

Make sure she knows they may get heavier. My first was really light so when my 2nd was a normal period it freaked me out. I was pretty regular from the start.

DD started in Year 6, and had heavy regular periods from the get go. We did tell her teacher, and this was great, as she arranged for DD to use the teachers toilets, which had supplies of pads and bins. There was another girl who also started that year, and it prompted class discussions of all things period related. This was a girls school though, so perhaps easier to facilitate.

Boyshorts.

Hi OP. I completely understand that you may feel distraught. Women who haven't had a difficult time with periods don't understand. I have had decades of pain so horrendous I faint and/or vomit, a week of dreadful PMT rage and depression and 10+ days of bleeding which may or may not leak through whatever sanitary protection I'm using. I started my periods age 12 and have been used to trying to minimise the debilitating symptoms for over 30 years now but no medical intervention or medication has truly worked. So when my primary-aged daughter started her periods I knew what lay in store and I feared for her.

So far we've had several medical appointments (and confirmation, via scan that she does not have endometriosis) but she too goes month to month on painkillers and doubling up on towels and period pants.

The 'it's just normal stop making a fuss' brigade have a very patriarchal attitude.

Practically, ibuprofen is best for pain (you'll likely know this) but there's a risk a child-sized dose won't be adequate and she can only take an adult dose age 12+. My daughter took time out of school when the pain was constant and made her vomit (thankfully only usually 1 or 2 days), school were very understanding.
Period pants are brilliant and my daughter prefers them - but there is still risk of leaks on heavy days.
I informed primary school as I was unsure whether there were sanitary bins in the girls loos (there were not!) and it was during covid when there was a stupid 'no bags allowed in school' policy which we had to get around so she could bring stuff in.
We have put together a small cosmetic bag of spare pants, pads, wipes and Sani bag for disposal which she carries in her school bag.

Your feelings are completely valid and so long as you don't share your distress with your DD she'll be fine with you looking out for her x

[edited for typo]