Shared underwear in a nursery

MD1 · 2024-10-01T14:48:43+00:00

Please calm me down as I cannot find a place to sit on. My DD started a nursery in Central London and it's fine in general but there is one rule which I was not aware of. If your child wets herself, they change to an underwear which was worn by (many) other children. They reassure me it's washed every time but I cannot calm down (you don't know how other parents wash it and with which other clothes D:). I did ask them if I still can bring mine for my DD every day and they said "No". Is it a common practice in nurseries? Please share your thoughts, experiences, pieces of advice. Thank you.

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Matilda1981 · 01/10/2024 15:50

You’re seriously over thinking this - mine would occasionally come home in underwear that wasn’t hers if she’d run out of clean ones in her bag or if I’d even forgotten to send her bag in with her - this is really a non issue - I mean what is your actual issue?!

TickingAlongNicely · 01/10/2024 15:50

The soares box is normal for when a child has nothing to change into.

Not being allowed to send a child with extra clothes is unusual

Soontobe60 · 01/10/2024 15:50

What? With kindness, get a grip.

gohomeroger1 · 01/10/2024 15:52

My DDs preschool you take spare clothes including underwear in a bag. But when she was potty training she did run out once so they put some of their spares on. Thought that was pretty normal. In fact I dropped off some brand new underwear for their spare collection as DD had grown too big before she could wear them.

Kindly I think you are overthinking it

HighPrecisionGhosts · 01/10/2024 15:58

They do wash them at nursery or the parents wash them and return them clean. Your child will be OK.

We used to always put spares in their bag but if toilet training was a nightmare or a parent forgot, then nursery would find a pair.

We used to take in pants for the 'spares' box to nursery and infant school.for the little accidents.

CrunchySnow · 01/10/2024 16:00

I think its a bit odd you can't just send some in with her. Ours only use spare clothes if they DD runs out of her own.

ButterAsADip · 01/10/2024 16:01

What’s upsetting about it?

You’re worried a different toddler bum has been in these pants before?

Very ususual not to be allowed to send in spares - every nursery we’ve used (four of them!) have said you MUST send spares.

savoycabbage · 01/10/2024 16:05

It's usual to check to see if a child has spare clothes and then to use the nursery spare clothes if they don't.

I've worked in countless nurseries and I've never once come across one where they use nursery clothes where they don't have to. It must cost them money as clothes will not always come back.

Original poster

MD1 · 01/10/2024 16:08

Thank you all for your thoughts ❤

I'm just a first-time mother, brought up in a very strict environment that's why some things/approaches seem quite odd to me, please excuse me.

The issue is how hygienic/safe it is in a first place? I don't know how many children did wear the underwear, I don't know if there is any infection, no one is going to check it, etc.

I understand it's easier and simpler for a nursery but just for a peace of mind, why not let (some 'crazy' like me) parents an option?

OP posts:

CaptainMyCaptain · 01/10/2024 16:12

It's quite normal. As a Nursery and Reception teacher in a school we had spare underwear for accidents and it was always washed between uses. I never thought anything of it and nobody ever complained.

MissMoneyFairy · 01/10/2024 16:12

Where do they get the storeroom pants from, I doubt they buy them so parents must have bought them in at some point. I'd ask for an extra pair be put in their schoolbag and the wet ones bagged up and sent home, sounds a bit bizarre. Do they have their own laundry service at the nursery.

SilenceInside · 01/10/2024 16:12

I don't think any child will have ever caught an infection by wearing cleanly washed pants. Germs are killed by soap.

savoycabbage · 01/10/2024 16:13

Honestly, nurseries are not particularly sterile environments.

Children will throw up or wee on the carpet. They will drop a straw and someone else will stand on it. They don't hang their coats up by the loop so they fall on the floor and then five children will trample over it. They forget to wash their hands after they have been to the toilet. They will peel an orange and lay the segments on the floor before they eat them.

The spare pants drawer is probably one of the cleanest places in there!

autienotnaughty · 01/10/2024 16:14

Odd that you can't take spares in.

Normal to have a emergency box of spares

savoycabbage · 01/10/2024 16:15

MissMoneyFairy · 01/10/2024 16:12

Where do they get the storeroom pants from, I doubt they buy them so parents must have bought them in at some point. I'd ask for an extra pair be put in their schoolbag and the wet ones bagged up and sent home, sounds a bit bizarre. Do they have their own laundry service at the nursery.

Most spare pants are given to nurseries by parents whose children have grown out of them.

The spare pants are washed by the wearers parents at their home.

Most nurseries have a washing machine but it's not for pants. It's for things like when someone falls in a puddle.

InTheRainOnATrain · 01/10/2024 16:15

Weird that you’re not supplying spares. Have you misunderstood maybe? I’ve had my 2 in 5 different settings ranging from American daycare to British prep school nursery and all said you MUST supply spares. But they of course do keep extras in case of a worse than anticipated potty training day! What about if someone is sick or falls in a puddle or something, do they have loads of spare outfits too? It makes no sense. But no it won’t be hygiene issue. Everyone will wash them before returning and this early in the term and given how few parents remember to return them, chances are they’re new out of the pack anyway!

LogRolling · 01/10/2024 16:17

This would also bother me. To not be allowed to put spares in her bag? Understandable if then run out to use the emergency supply but easier to have parents have a Spares bag

InTheRainOnATrain · 01/10/2024 16:17

MissMoneyFairy · 01/10/2024 16:12

Where do they get the storeroom pants from, I doubt they buy them so parents must have bought them in at some point. I'd ask for an extra pair be put in their schoolbag and the wet ones bagged up and sent home, sounds a bit bizarre. Do they have their own laundry service at the nursery.

I asked once and the teacher said they bulk buy them at Asda at the start of the term. All part of the ‘consumables’ charge I guess!

Original poster

MD1 · 01/10/2024 16:17

savoycabbage · 01/10/2024 16:05

It's usual to check to see if a child has spare clothes and then to use the nursery spare clothes if they don't.

I've worked in countless nurseries and I've never once come across one where they use nursery clothes where they don't have to. It must cost them money as clothes will not always come back.

I asked them several times kindly if I can at least put spare clothes AND underwear in her bag and if they have time to check her bag, take it from there (if an accident happens) and they always said "No". They said they have their own system of USED (washed) underwear (and clothes) and they tell all the parents do not bring any spare ones as they will use only theirs (the used/washed ones, provided by a nursery).

OP posts:

DappledThings · 01/10/2024 16:19

This is really not a big deal. Why do you think they'd put her in dirty underwear. It'll all be clean. You're hugely overreacting.

SometimesCalmPerson · 01/10/2024 16:19

You are being ridiculous. If this weren’t fine, nurseries wouldn’t do it.

Original poster

MD1 · 01/10/2024 16:20

savoycabbage · 01/10/2024 16:13

Honestly, nurseries are not particularly sterile environments.

Children will throw up or wee on the carpet. They will drop a straw and someone else will stand on it. They don't hang their coats up by the loop so they fall on the floor and then five children will trample over it. They forget to wash their hands after they have been to the toilet. They will peel an orange and lay the segments on the floor before they eat them.

The spare pants drawer is probably one of the cleanest places in there!

🙂❤

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ButterAsADip · 01/10/2024 16:20

The issue is how hygienic/safe it is in a first place?

I mean, how hygienic is a nursery really overall? 😵‍💫 just don’t think about it OP. It will all be fine.

Ribenaberry12 · 01/10/2024 16:25

No spares does seem a bit weird. I wonder if they had a parent kick off at their kid’s lost Toast/Armani/Gucci clothing and so now it’s just a blanket ‘no spares’ policy. That’s the only reason I can think of. One always spoils it for the rest!

The pants from the pants drawer is standard. I wouldn’t worry about that at all.

Original poster

MD1 · 01/10/2024 16:27

InTheRainOnATrain · 01/10/2024 16:15

Weird that you’re not supplying spares. Have you misunderstood maybe? I’ve had my 2 in 5 different settings ranging from American daycare to British prep school nursery and all said you MUST supply spares. But they of course do keep extras in case of a worse than anticipated potty training day! What about if someone is sick or falls in a puddle or something, do they have loads of spare outfits too? It makes no sense. But no it won’t be hygiene issue. Everyone will wash them before returning and this early in the term and given how few parents remember to return them, chances are they’re new out of the pack anyway!

That's their rule, no spares (it was even written in their guide; once your child started the nursery, they give it to you to familiarise yourself with).
They are definitely not new. We had an accident twice and on both occasions we had used (but, yes, washed) underwear. One was partly broken and another was visibly washed very-many-times.

OP posts: