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Premature birth

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Am I allowed to discharge my baby if I feel he's ready to come home?

33 replies

Icebo · 24/03/2014 12:55

Hi all, I'm a new dad and this is my first post here. Please be nice!

My son was born 3 weeks ago at 34 1/2 weeks gestation and has been in NICU since then. After a few minor complications with feeding (not digesting milk fast enough) he finally got the knack of breastfeeding. We've been rooming in with him for 3 days now and have been looking after him ourselves unsupported by the nurses.

We're itching to get him home now and feel that he is ready, but the doctor wants us to wait a few more days. His only concern is that he's only just caught up to his birth weight, but other than that he's fine.

Can we insist on taking him home? The nurses have been brilliant throughout his stay, but we really feel that he needs no more support from them now.

Thanks in advance!

OP posts:
Dildals · 25/03/2014 21:05

They called it 'rooming in' at our UK hospital too. I can totally understand you want to get out of there. If your baby is born prem but no other issues than to establish feeding and all other normal prem issues are resolved (such as bradycardias, maintaining heat etc) then the best place is home really. Getting on with BFing is much easier at home and there is a smaller risk of picking up an infection.

The nurses do have a checklist before you can be discharged, ie you need to be able to give him his supplements (assuming he's not on any meds), you need to have bathed him a couple of times, feeding of course, general cares, baby CPR etc. They also would want to see baby gaining weight, perhaps that is why you are still in?

I roomed in for one night and was discharged. My baby was 35+6 when she was discharged, born at 29 weeks.

I would speak to the dr to understand what is keeping him in still, then it will be easier to comply!

I have sat staring at the exit sign at SCBU for ages wondering if anyone actually ever 'stole' their baby home!! (apparently that did happen, but staff called security :-) )

One of the other posters mentioned taking baby home for an afternoon, unfortunately that was not allowed in our hospital. One of the surgical babies that had been in there for AGES was only allowed to go for a little indoor walk on hospital premises, it's to do with if something happens with baby while he's technically still in their care.

Another poster mentioned that she found being home v stressful. I didn't find that. I was so happy to be out of that firkin hospital. The first night home I did have a minor panic thinking 'OMG what if she doesn't manage to feed without a tube', but after my DH talked some sense in to me I was OK. I didn't check on her every minute to see if she was still breathing either, to be fair, she slept on my chest most of the time :-), and I just really enjoyed having her home. I am STILL enjoying it actually!

MultipleMama · 29/03/2014 20:00

I understand the feeling of being desperate. I had twins at 31w exactly dtd was in for around 9 weeks and dts was in for 20w exactly. 4 weeks in I was already desperate to go home even though it was not possible. Dtd was ready to go home around 6-7 weeks but they wanted to keep her in and monitored her feeding. She bfs really well and gained decent weight but they wanted to absolutely sure.

There was no way in hell I would have risked my baby's life because I was desperate to have her home and went against the doctors. She was in NICU/SCBU for a reason.

Personally, I would not go against the doctors on this. What's a few more days...

MiaowTheCat · 30/03/2014 11:25

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

newmummy2014 · 02/04/2014 00:10

I had my son 6 weeks early and he was in scbu for 4 weeks near the end after he had passed all his goals and there was nothing keeping him in there I was getting frustrated and annoyed he was my baby and I wanted him own I asked what would happen if I just walked out with him and they said they would get the child protection unit involved xx

Am I allowed to discharge my baby if I feel he's ready to come home?
Am I allowed to discharge my baby if I feel he's ready to come home?
Am I allowed to discharge my baby if I feel he's ready to come home?
SantasLittleMonkeyButler · 02/04/2014 00:19

As far as I am aware, you technically speaking can discharge your child but - if this is against medical advice - you could expect SS/Child Protection to be notified.

IMHO (and I have been there with DS1), this is one of those times in life where you really should take the advice of the professionals.

Bramshott · 02/04/2014 10:58

Hope you have your lovely DS home by now Icebo!

zoemaguire · 28/04/2014 18:01

Late to this thread but for reference for anyone reading at a later date, I come from the opposite perspective and would say at this stage 'go for it' and argue to the skies for immediate discharge unless they can come up with a very good reason to keep you. Hospital is a big infection risk and unless you are with your baby 24/7, at the going home stage the nurses will not be checking on your baby nearly as often as you can at home.

We didn't discharge against medical advice, but we certainly backed the consultant into a corner (almost literally Grin) until she agreed to let us go home - at 36 weeks, 10 weeks after DS's birth. He was in a hospital an hour from home and we had a toddler DD at the time, so we couldn't be in all the time. Meanwhile he was lying alone in his cot, being checked for obs 4-hourly by the nurses! He also wasn't gaining enough weight, because they weren't topping him up enough through his ng tube after I had breastfed him. He only weighed 1.7kg when he came home, ng tube in place. It was scary but he thrived from that point on. We could be with him 24 hours a day and give him as much milk as he needed (under advice from different, competent nutritionist at our local hospital). He put on a lb within a week and has done amazingly well since. He starts school in september!

Sometimes parents do know better than some doctors.

Helpys · 28/04/2014 18:05

Go for it, what could go wrong?
Hmm

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