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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

I've just found out I'm pregnant (with my first) - Any tips you wish someone had told you?

45 replies

RaachelMorrow · 27/01/2020 12:43

I just found out I'm pregnant over the weekend, and although unplanned, it's now a very wanted baby from myself, daddy, and inner family.

My appointment with the midwife isn't until Friday, but I'm just so scared I'm going to mess this up and we're not even off the starting line yet.

Any first timer advice for someone who's only 6 weeks and just found out? And knows NOTHING about pregnancy? - I've none of my friends or family have been pregnant.

What sort of diet should I be looking at? Just balanced? With Folic Acid & Omega multivitamins?

I've been spotting, very light brown, for about 2 weeks, how long does this last and is this okay?

Thank you so much!

Rachel

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fonxey · 27/01/2020 17:44

Don't be paranoid about what you can and can't eat. You'll be fine if you eat a bit of brie or salami here and there just don't go overboard. If your diet consists of salami, brie, duck liver pate then you might need to rethink. Otherwise just chill. Just eat moderately healthy.

During the first few weeks you will be so hungry that you will have to eat now. So keep snacks on hand or you will eat your husband's arm. I couldn't even wait 5mins for dinner to be served i had to eat. I was waking up at midnight taking bites out of random pastries or whatever i could find.

You will have days where you are so tired you can't get out of bed, can't concentrate, can't do anything. Take the day off and stay in bed. Don't feel guilty. Work isn't remotely important.

Exercise. Don't sit around. Be active, keep doing what you'd do normally just moderate it.

Join preggo yoga group. Practice meditation.

Sign up for nct. I wish we had. We decided not to and the nhs messed is around a bit and we ended up not going.

Swat up on nursery rhymes.

moobar · 27/01/2020 17:49

Trust YOUR instinct. Everyone will want to tell you what to do, you have not done it before but neither has YOUR baby. I found it overwhelming and utterly confusing being told hundreds of different ways to do the same thing by everyone who supposedly knew better. You will find your own way.

I don't mean don't listen to advice, but consider it and go with what you feel is best.

RougeVinEtFromage · 27/01/2020 17:52

After you've given birth, you basically have to do it all over again. The after birth for me was horrendous and I was so unprepared for it! I was in agony!!!

IslayBrigid · 27/01/2020 18:15

I'm still early on in my pregnancy too (9 weeks) but would echo much of what people have already said, and also thank you to all, as this is very helpful for me too :) Congrats!!

I would highly recommend the book The Positive Birth Book by Millie Hill - it covers pregnancy AND birth and it's so informative! Really really recommended.

I am taking omega 3 supplements, apparently they are meant to be good! I also take a prenatal supplement with folate, vitamin D and other essentials.

BTW I know a Rachel Morrow in real life and I'm wondering if it is the same person (though imagine your username is probably not your real name - mine isn't haha) :) x

zeeeex · 27/01/2020 18:52

@erised summed up what I came here to say!

Amys136 · 27/01/2020 19:07

Def agree on pregnancy yoga. Made me feel so much better and healthier

NCT was great more for the social side. I’m coming towards the end of my mat leave and still meet up with the mums and babies once a week

KisstheTeapot14 · 27/01/2020 21:21

Enjoy peace and quiet.

Birth will go its own way, like life. Life is what happens while we're making other plans Lennon said. Remember this if drawing up a birth plan.

KisstheTeapot14 · 27/01/2020 21:27

Nursery rhymes and songs to sing - yes

The Gentle Birth Method Book.

Slings can be useful.

Take time to idle about, dream, record your thoughts maybe keep a little diary for you/baby when your older. Its a precious time, and a experience to treasure - you know, between back aches, leg cramp and upchucking. Its still pretty miraculous, you are making a baby in there!

fonxey · 27/01/2020 22:02

@21KisstheTeapot14

Exactly what you said. I told myself not to get too fond of my birth preference and was well aware things could go awry. I even told myself this over and over.

But what i wanted went the polar opposite direction and i think it really effected me more than i imagined.

Hormones are powerful things. I was hugely emotional after the birth and due to my birth not being what i wanted, it fit me risky upset.

Anyway, research what you want and key up on everything that could happen so that you can make your own decisions during labour.

Birth prefs are good in that they get you thinking about stuff but don't just think about what you want, but what your choices might be if things do go tits up. Which i did and I'm glad.

Make sure your hubby knows this plan inside out cos he should be your advocate through all this. He doesn't get to stand in the corner.

Just don't sit there plotting it out in your head. Be prepared. Think about what you want.

Thestrangestthing · 27/01/2020 22:05

Don't stress yourself about getting the perfect matching things, don't spend a fortune on a cot, or swing etc. It doesn't last long and it really doesn't matter what any of the stuff looks like when the baby comes, you won't give a shit, all you care about us them.
Get a good pram suitable for what you will be using it for. Easy to fold, compact, supportive, sturdy, good sized basket. Most are pretty food now but again, you will switch to a buggy within a couple of years so don't break the bank.

RaachelMorrow · 28/01/2020 11:45

Oh my gosh, thank you all so much. Some absolute diamonds of advice in here and also reassurance! Almost cried a one point haha!

My first midwife appointment is booked for Friday!

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RaachelMorrow · 28/01/2020 12:02

Yeah it is my real name - absolute rookie clearly haha!

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robertaforest · 28/01/2020 12:14

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Cherryrainbow · 29/01/2020 07:57

You're probably gunna poop in a room full of people when you're in labour and pushing. Honestly I thought this was a joke in the tv show scrubs. No no it happens lol.

kjhkj · 29/01/2020 08:00

Don't buy all the baby crap. Seriously, you don't need most of it and they grow so very quickly.

ChocoChunk1 · 29/01/2020 08:16

Top and tail baths are a waste of money.
Don't be sucked into buying things that people say you need. A lot of stuff marketed at parents end up in the loft or shed unused.
I was unprepared for the first toilet visit after birth. Shock
Birth plans are nice in theory but rarely executed in practice.
Borrow pregnancy clothes, especially jeans and trousers, if you can, unless you plan to have more after this LO!
Popcorn is good for sickness, alongside ginger tea.

DerbyshireGirly · 29/01/2020 12:00

I'm 32 weeks pregnant so can't offer any advice for when baby is here, but hopefully some of this will be useful for your pregnancy:

I completely agree with the recommendation for the Positive Birth Book by Milli Hill. I was quite anxious about labour before I read this but I'm really excited for it now. Obviously I don't know what will happen on the day but at least I get to spend the run up looking forward to it and I feel like I'm much more equipped to deal with all the eventualities now.

Get into good postural habits now (stop crossing your legs if you do, be conscious of legs lower than hips etc) as it's important for baby's position later on. Helps to avoid back-to-back labour which may be longer and more painful. Birth ball would be a good idea later on.

This one is for second trimester onwards but I've found my maternity pillow an absolute lifesaver. I've struggled with back pain and it's been so helpful. Great for keeping me on my side when I sleep, but I also wrap it round me when I'm sitting all day at work for extra support. I think you can even use it for nursing afterwards and then sitting baby up even further down the line. I got the JoJo Maman Bebe microbean pillow but there's probably loads that do the same thing. I should be on commission I've recommended it that much!

One thing you can really look forward to is feeling your baby move, it's absolutely magical. It's such a tiny strange feeling at first and you'll probably not be sure whether "this is it", but all too soon it's change into seeing their little bum sticking out your stomach as they stretch their legs and feet lodging under your ribs. Probably the most special part of pregnancy for me.

You'll probably go through moments where you think "what the f have we done" and it'll be like your heart is in your mouth. Totally normal, doesn't mean you've made a mistake and nothing to feel guilty about. This is a huge huge thing! Life changing. Normal to have brief spells of panic.

Something I see a lot of ladies worried about on here is loss of symptoms around the 9 week mark. This is around the time when the placenta takes over so if you're lucky you'll start feeling much more like your old self. However it can be quite scary and it's easy to worry that something is amiss. Pregnancy is the only time in your life you'll worry about not feeling ill enough!

Linked to the above point, when I was around 9 weeks I had quite a large bleed which coincided with my symptoms disappeared and I was convinced I'd miscarried - what I didn't know was that bleeding in the first trimester is very common and most of the time it's benign. If it happens to you, obviously get it checked out, just wanted to mention it as I thought it definitely meant I was miscarrying until it happened.

NCT classes I've found really useful so far, the group is very mixed and probably not the kind of people I'd normally socialise with but I do think I'll stay in touch with them and the course information is very helpful.

BananaLeafLady · 29/01/2020 12:03

Don't tell anyone name choices or possibilities.
Consider adding 2 weeks onto due date when tekking people when you are due.

Nannewnannew · 29/01/2020 12:14

I agree with pp who said not to worry about buying expensive matching baby stuff, they are in it for such a short time.
Also, I don’t know if this is true or fashionable nowadays but when I was pregnant I just used to wear normal bikini pants throughout the pregnancies, I ended up with horrible mummy tummy to this day. My friend wore supporting sort of ‘granny pants’ and her stomach is as flat as a board. BUT I think you would need to ask your midwife because maybe I’m talking rubbish! Anyway, Congratulations and wishing you a happy and healthy pregnancy. 💐🍼

Jademoroc · 29/01/2020 20:56

I’m pregnant with my 2nd child and I've never taken pregnancy vitamins folic acid I ate what ever I wanted and I never listened to a health visitor Smile my sons immune system is amazing lol he’s 11 but congratulations remember your the parent do what ever you feel is right for your child.

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